Marriage between men and women seems to be a matter of two people, but in fact it is a matter of two families, whether the relationship between the mother's family and the in-laws can be properly handled is also a very important thing, a good family can be a bowl of water, the husband and wife together to face the trivial things in life, jointly maintain the relationship between the two families and the parents of the two families, feelings, can become less, reduce unnecessary contradictions.
However, for the elderly, their children are always their own heart meat, no matter when they are their most beloved people, in many cases will consider their children, but when the real face of children's happiness and their own good and bad, many parents will still be mainly children, even if they are bitter, tired.
A 52-year-old aunt cried that living with my relatives in my daughter's house was the stupidest decision I made
I am 52 years old this year, my wife died a few years ago, the family has always been my life alone, but over the years my health, but also optimistic, everything in life is very plain, but also very happy, there is a daughter, but the daughter has been married for five years, the place where the daughter married is next door city, each time to visit the daughter also needs a lot of time, although today's traffic conditions have been very convenient, but the road also needs three hours, and the daughter also has her own work on weekdays, I don't want to bother my daughter, Every time I went to my daughter's house, I didn't live long and left until this year.
After the end of this year, I moved to my daughter's house to live, because my daughter said that the child is now in school, the mother-in-law's legs and feet are not good, and picking up the child is also a problem, and the couple does not have time to pick up the child, or need Aunt Wu to help in the past, Aunt Wu originally wanted to refuse, but the daughter said:
"It's okay, they all told their family that their mother's legs and feet are not good, it is not convenient to walk, his father has not retired, so he can only let you pass, and you are bored at home alone, our mother and daughter have not lived together for a long time, and this time there is also a chance." 」
Looking at my daughter's request, I also agreed, and only then did I move to my daughter's house.
On the first day of my daughter's home, I felt dissatisfied, but the mother-in-law who lived in my daughter's house for many years posed as a hostess, and did not seem to have much welcome for my arrival, that night we were eating outside, and when I returned home after eating, I just wanted to rest, but my relatives said:
"Dear family, the family is not well taken care of, the place is also small, you may have to be wronged to sleep with your girlfriend today, let Xiao Zhang (the daughter's husband) sleep in the living room."
In fact, the family is indeed relatively small, three rooms and a living room, a daughter and a son-in-law, a child, a mother and a father, but the father only comes to live on the weekend.
In the face of this request of the mother, I actually did not have much thought, after all, this is also the best arrangement, I agreed to it, the next morning my daughter got up early to make breakfast, in fact, I did not expect my daughter to get up so early, I thought I cooked it, but my daughter was earlier than me, when I asked my daughter, my daughter said:
"I'm used to it, I still have to catch the subway, finish it early, eat it, I'll leave, they get up late."
My daughter's words made me feel a little dissatisfied, complaining:
"Your mother-in-law can't get up to cook?" She's so idle throughout the day, let her cook breakfast, and you can sleep more. ”
Daughter said:
"She's not in good health, just let her rest, I'll prepare my own breakfast."
During the conversation, there was movement in the family one after another, everyone also got up, and after eating, they went their separate ways, and just when I wanted to clean up the dishes, my mother suddenly said:
"Dear family, don't pack up first, send your children to school first, otherwise your children will be late, and on the first day, they will learn to take a taxi at the door and recognize the road."
I was really caught off guard by this sentence of the family, because I really did not know the road, and on the first day, I wanted to let her accompany me on a trip, I recognized the road, but when I saw her say so, I could not ask for it again, so I had to agree.
Fortunately, the distance is not very far, or recognize the road, after sending the child home on the way to think that there is no big deal, I walked back, bought some vegetables by the way, but when I returned home, I did not expect that the dishes and chopsticks in the morning had not been cleaned up, after cleaning up the dishes and chopsticks, the mother of the family entered them, after some inquiry, I knew that she had just walked down the road and went, looking for friends downstairs but basking in the sun, which made me feel very uncomfortable, but in order not to make a contradiction, there was not too much to talk about.
Lunch was prepared by the two of us, but at noon I and my own mother, plus the three children to eat, I still have to rush to pick up the child at noon, after eating everyone will take a lunch break, in the afternoon I went to send the child, pick up the child, come back and clean up the house, and then cook, eat, wash the dishes, this day is also so plain past, and the mother of the family went downstairs to find someone to chat after sleeping well in the afternoon, and went to square dance after eating in the evening, these kinds of performances made me have to complain to my daughter at night:
"Your mother-in-law is in good health, she is still walking downstairs every day, and she still dances square dance at night, so why can't she send children?"
But the daughter said:
"Then what is the way, the old man said that her health is not good, I can say that I don't believe it when I am a junior, and I was also there when I went to the hospital for examination last time, and the doctor also suggested that she walk less, and more or less listened."
I smiled helplessly, and I stopped talking, and the state of life for the next few days was basically like this, the daughter was still very busy, and the son-in-law also slept on the sofa for a long time, until one day the mother said:
"If we don't rent a house, there are not a lot of rental houses near our community, it is not expensive, let's rent a house, so that the place is bigger, and everyone can rest well."
Although the words of the mother-in-law also make sense, she goes on to say:
"Mother, if you don't rent a house, it's not far from our house, it's less than ten minutes to walk, and you can sleep there at night and sleep more comfortably."
I also never expected my mother to say this, but my daughter was not satisfied:
"My mother came all the way to help deliver the children, which can make my mother go to live in a rental house."
Saying and touching the son-in-law, let the son-in-law go to live, and the son-in-law also laughed at this time:
"I don't have to rent a house, this house is enough, I don't feel uncomfortable sleeping on the sofa, it's okay."
Although this matter ended quickly, but then there was already an discomfort between me and my mother, she felt that this home is not mine, I came to live here just a guest, everywhere in life is a face, reflecting that I am the master of the family, but I also feel unwilling, my daughter's home, why should I bow to people, and this estrangement and contradiction between us has gradually affected life, so that my daughter is not very good.
Finally, after living in my daughter's house for two months, I put forward the idea of going home, on the one hand, I felt that the body of the mother could go to pick up and drop off the child, not so serious, on the other hand, it was inconvenient to live at home, and it also brought trouble to the daughter, so I found an excuse to say that there was something at home, I wanted to be friends, I went back, although the daughter was very reluctant, but the mother also said a sentence before I left, she said:
"Dear family, you don't care about the children when you go back, I really envy you, a free and carefree life, even like me, I have to worry about this family when you leave, the next time you come to live for a while."
I don't know if her words were complaining or polite, but they always made me sound a little uncomfortable, and finally left.
On the way home, I also decided, after the pension will not go to the daughter's home, even if I live alone at home, even if I have money to live in the nursing home, do not go to the daughter's home, living with my relatives in the daughter's home is my most stupid decision, although the daughter's husband and wife feelings are very good, the child is also obedient, but this mother-in-law still has to let them give the pension later, if I move in the future, I can't help but quarrel, but also add trouble to the daughter, and the last difficult thing to do is the daughter.
Write at the end:
Aunt Wu's life experience does not sound satisfactory, for Aunt Wu's decision is actually understandable, which also gives a lot of old people a wake-up call, living in the daughter's home, the relationship between the family and the family still needs to be well grasped, well understood, to get along well, this can also reduce the contradiction, so that it can not bring trouble to the children, make life easier, what do you think?