There is a saying on the Internet: a good mother-in-law relationship is not necessarily helpful for the maintenance of marriage; a bad mother-in-law relationship is definitely the last straw that overwhelms marriage.
Whether the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will crush the marriage depends on the performance of the man, after all, the woman marries a man and wants to live with the man for a lifetime, not with the mother-in-law. If the man is good, loves his wife, has responsibility, will protect his wife, women feel that they have not married the wrong person, often will not worry about their mother-in-law, big deal not to live with their mother-in-law, keep a certain distance, and let men get things done.
However, if men do not act, it is not suitable for entrusting life, so that women can not see the slightest hope of happiness, even if the in-laws are good, they cannot let women have the confidence to continue to go on.
If the man can't figure it out, the in-laws are still unreasonable, that is to say, the woman encounters the best combination of the scumbag and the evil mother-in-law, then there is no way out but to leave quickly.
As Liu Liu, the screenwriter of "Double Sided Glue", once said: "In the trivial life of chicken feathers, what women care most about is often not how to resolve the contradiction itself, but in the process of resolving the contradiction, whether the husband is standing behind him." ”
But if Li Yaping can carry it clearly and can help Hu Lijuan, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will not intensify to that step. From beginning to end, Hu Lijuan targeted the wrong person, and the person who really harmed her was not the evil mother-in-law, but Li Yaping!
"Wife, the house has been found, hurry up to pack up your things, ready to move." , pack your clothes and books. The landlord aunt said, allow the cat, turn around daddy to hold a kitten for you to come back with you, okay? ”
"Well, long live Daddy, Daddy's the best."
Hearing Mr. Wang's words, her daughter cheered and immediately began to pack her things. However, seeing his daughter smile, Mr. Wang cried and shed tears.
When his wife, Ms. Lin, saw the situation, she patted her husband's shoulder and also went into the house to clean up, leaving Mr. Wang with a space to be alone and let him calm down.
"I forced him to move out, and I said, if he doesn't move out again, I'm going to get a divorce and leave him with my daughter." It's not that I'm excessive, I have to let him fall out with his parents, but my in-laws are really disrespectful to the old, even if they are not good for me, they are not good for my daughter. Living with them again is definitely not conducive to my daughter's growth, and as a mother, I can't continue to endure it. ”
01.
Thirteen years ago, 24-year-old Ms. Lin met Mr. Wang when she was working outside the home, and the two fell in love.
Because Mr. Wang's family is generally poor, his hometown is too far from Ms. Lin's home and belongs to the distant marriage, so their relationship was opposed by Ms. Lin's parents, and Ms. Lin's brother even found Mr. Wang, beat Mr. Wang, and forced him to leave his sister.
However, Ms. Lin has been stubborn since childhood, and she cannot tolerate interference in her own affairs, even her own relatives, and insists on marrying Mr. Wang. In the end, Ms. Lin's parents compromised and agreed to the marriage.
"Now that I think about it, my mother is not wrong, there are many disadvantages in marrying far away, marrying so far, there are no familiar people around, and the mother's family is far from being bullied. In addition, I fell out with my parents for the sake of marriage, and I was embarrassed to go to my parents for help, feeling ashamed. ”
When Ms. Lin got married, her in-laws cried and told her that the family's economic situation was average, and she really couldn't afford to buy a house for them, and Ms. Lin didn't think much at first, so she didn't want a house and lived with her in-laws.
However, three years later, the little uncle got married, the in-laws not only gave the daughter-in-law a dowry of 200,000 yuan, but also took out money to buy a marriage house for the young son, seeing this scene, Ms. Lin understood, dare to be affectionate, the in-laws just feel that they are bullying and cheap.
Because of the different treatment when getting married, the relationship between Ms. Lin and her in-laws deteriorated rapidly, plus they lived under a roof, they did not look up and look down, it was easy to have friction, it was easy to have friction, it was a big quarrel for three days and a small quarrel for two days, and the relationship was naturally difficult to reconcile.
02.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have a conflict, Mr. Wang is very difficult to deal with, his wife and mother are looking for their own complaints, let themselves judge, help who will offend the other side, Mr. Wang also feels very worried.
Ms. Lin loves Mr. Wang very much, in order not to make her husband feel distressed, she has relented a little, tolerated a lot of her mother-in-law, hoped for the family and everything, what she did not expect was that she tolerated it, and the mother-in-law had to make progress.
"Living with my in-laws, how depressing. Like my husband, I need to go to work to earn money to support my family, and I can't come back until seven or eight o'clock in the evening. However, no matter how late I came back, my in-laws did not cook, waiting for me to come back to cook, I came back late, they would scold and grin, and my mother-in-law was even more broken, saying that I did not do a good job outside. ”
Ms. Lin can only rest one day a week, but it is difficult to sleep until she is lazy, her mother-in-law gets up at six o'clock every day, and the first thing after getting up is to wake up Ms. Lin, make her breakfast, direct Ms. Lin to do housework, and let Ms. Lin serve their old two.
Although the little uncle has a marriage room and does not live together, because of the proximity, he often runs to his parents with his family to eat, but no matter how many people eat, cooking is Ms. Lin's job alone.
"My husband is still good, although it is not good to quarrel with his parents, but he also knows how to take the handle and help me work together, but as I give birth to a daughter and a sister-in-law gives birth to a son, my relationship with my in-laws is even worse."
03.
Ms. Lin's in-laws do not want to see Ms. Lin, let alone See Ms. Lin's daughter, and their eccentricity is extreme.
"From my grandson's kindergarten to my daughter's school, it was only a ten-minute walk, and they didn't help me pick up the children, but fortunately my daughter and the neighbor's daughter were classmates, and the neighbors picked them up together." The grandson improved one, they generously rewarded, what they wanted to give, my daughter took the first place in the class, they came to a sentence about what is the use of girls reading, angry at me. ”
Grandparents treat themselves and their cousins with a double-standard attitude, and Ms. Lin's daughter naturally found out, crying some time ago and asking Ms. Lin: "Mom, do grandparents not like me, only like my brother?" ”
While comforting her daughter, Ms. Lin felt that this was not a way to go on, and she moved the idea of moving out.
"I wanted to move out, but my husband hesitated, saying that it was not good to fall out directly with my parents, and just when we were in a stalemate, one of my mother-in-law's actions completely annoyed me and made me mad."
On that day, the family of 8 people gathered for dinner, and It was Ms. Lin who cooked alone, and Ms. Lin was busy in the kitchen, and she heard her mother-in-law and sister-in-law talking and laughing outside, which was even more angry. After serving a few dishes, Ms. Lin heard the voice of her mother-in-law cursing, scolding her own daughter, and quickly came out to check the situation.
"Your family of 8 people have a dinner, I 1 person cooks without saying, my daughter wants to eat shrimp, your mother even took the plate away, and scolded my daughter for being the same as her mother, useless fart, hungry, like words?"
It turned out that Ms. Lin made a dish of garlic shrimp, this dish is the daughter's favorite, the daughter just wanted to clip, the mother-in-law even brought the plate to the grandson's face, to help the grandson peel the shell. Seeing that the delicious food was gone, Ms. Lin's daughter cried, and the mother-in-law not only did not feel that she was wrong, but scolded her granddaughter.
Ms. Lin couldn't bear it and forced her husband to give herself an explanation, otherwise she really had to consider divorce. Fortunately, Mr. Wang gave an explanation, rented a house, and moved out with his wife and daughter.
"Seeing that we were going to move away, my mother-in-law was crying and making trouble at home, and wouldn't let us go. The family can't live without my free nanny, right? No matter how you make a fuss, I'm done. ”
Mr. Wang also stood on the side of Ms. Lin, fiercely counting down the mother's behavior of preferring sons to daughters, bullying daughters-in-law and granddaughters, and finally, their family of 3 had their own nest.
04.
Psychologist Zeng Qifeng once said: "The relationship between husband and wife is the needle of the family, as long as the husband and wife relationship is the core of the family and has the first right to speak, then the family will be as stable as a rock." ”
Man, whether the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can ruin your happiness depends on your inaction. If you don't act, help your relatives and don't help, connive at your mother to bully your wife, make your wife feel insecure, and have the feeling that I am an outsider at home, she can't see the hope of living with you, how can she not leave you?
If you are willing to act, be kind to your wife, and fulfill your responsibilities as a husband and father, when your parents are old, your wife may be willing to give you face and not worry about your parents.
Running a marriage requires husband and wife to work together, and if you can't grasp your own happiness, you can't blame anyone.
END.
Xiao Qiqi asked you to comment: If your husband is still good, are you willing to look at his face and forgive your in-laws who have bullied you? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.