About two weeks ago, a shocking domestic violence case broke out in the UK -
Sheree Spencer, a former British executive of the Royal Penitentiary and Probation Authority, who claims to have a good relationship with Boris, has been beating, abusing and PUA her husband, Richard Spencer, for the past two decades.
According to evidence provided by her husband, Richard, he was brutally abused every day during the marriage.
His wife would spit in his face, grab a cell phone or remote control and throw it at him.
At one point, she even hit him in the ear with a wine bottle until it was permanently deformed.
Instead of remorseful for these atrocities, Sheree has been brainwashing Richard into believing that this punishment is because he has failed her.
She then defecated on the floor and forced Spencer to clean her up like a slave.
Even the judge said it was "the worst act of control and coercion he had ever seen."
After the incident broke, Sheree was finally punished, sentenced to four years in prison and banned from contact with Richard again.
In a recent interview, victim Richard reviewed for the first time what he had suffered over the past few decades.
Surprisingly, even he couldn't tell why he never chose to divorce.
The long period of abuse seems to have numbed his heart -
"A few times when I caught a glimpse of Sheree, I didn't feel anything at all. I don't feel anger, I don't feel fear. I don't have any emotions. ”
In fact, before meeting Sheree, Richard was actually a very successful "sunny and cheerful big boy" in the secular sense.
Although Richard's mom died when he was nine years old, from an early age, his dad poured out endless love for him and his sister and did everything he could to make their lives carefree.
Growing up in this environment, Richard is very close to the entire extended family.
Even the stepmother whom his father later married was quite good with him. Maternal love also returned to him in another way.
Richard, bathed in love, has no negative energy in life.
He grew up smoothly along the way.
After graduating from Leeds Beckett University with a major in computer science, he successfully entered the British Telecom Group and got an offer for network design, which is equivalent to entering a state-owned enterprise as soon as he graduated.
With his outstanding ability in the professional field, Richard quickly made a name for himself in the company and began to attend various international conferences, becoming a "child of others" in the eyes of others.
Moreover, in addition to his career achievements, Richard also knows how to enjoy life and is very charismatic.
Outside of work, he enjoys spending time with his family, going to the gym and occasionally traveling.
It can be said that Richard then and now have completely opposite personalities.
He is outgoing and confident, and is a sparkling presence in the eyes of others. The people around him are very happy to make friends with him.
However, no one could have imagined at that time that such an honest and excellent person would be completely destroyed because of a marriage...
In 2000, 23-year-old Richard met a charming blonde girl in a nightclub and quickly fell in love.
Yes, she's 22-year-old Sheree.
She was beautiful, funny, lively and kind.
He will prepare gifts for everyone, will smile wide at Richard, and will become a shining presence at the party because of that confidence.
After becoming acquainted, Sheree also told Richard about his unfortunate family and childhood.
The opposite is true of Richard's family.
She has alcoholic parents, has witnessed abuse from an early age, and has had to live a life of displacement.
Sheree was the first person Richard fell in love with in his life.
Therefore, he silently told himself in his heart: "I must help her, I must make her happy." ”
However, in fact, instead of saving the other party, he was dragged into the abyss by the other party. This is where the nightmare life begins...
After just a few months together, Sheree's kind and lively mask was torn apart.
Richard gradually discovers that Sheree becomes irritable, irritable, and constantly finds fault and throws fire on himself when he drinks alcohol.
At first, she just dropped things, or pushed and slapped him.
But afterwards, she would immediately write a note apologizing, telling how much she loved him and promising never to do it again.
Then she came up with a classic PUA phrase to excuse herself — "If you don't, I won't do that."
In the face of this, Richard, who still loves Sheree deeply, has repeatedly chosen to believe and forgive.
Even he really reflected on his behavior and self-examined that he shouldn't argue with Sheree.
However, countless cases have proved that understanding and tolerance in the face of people like Sheree will only escalate the situation again.
Sure enough, Sheree's behavior began to go to extremes and become more and more uncontrollable.
In January 2007, Richard discovered a devastated fact – Sheree was cheating on him behind his back, and the adulterer was still a good friend of his.
Richard can't accept the fact that he was betrayed by someone he loved. But when he wanted an explanation, only Sheree's accusations were greeted by the splitting face.
Sheree only listened to her words and said that the cheating was all because Richard didn't listen to her and insisted on going to his aunt's party, so she chose to sleep with someone else that day.
"You put your family before me, and you are also disloyal, so you deserve all this." Sheree said viciously.
But just after the cruel words, Sheree sent a lot of emails to Richard like a split personality, telling him over and over again: she loves him very much, he is her soul mate, and she can't do without him.
Richard was completely confused by her. And then...... Once again, I chose to believe in Sheree.
He was successful by PUA and even "raided" himself, believing that Sheree's cheating was indeed all his fault.
Because he was busy working to make money and cared too much about his family, he neglected Sheree's feelings.
As a result, instead of breaking up with Sheree, Richard distanced himself from family and friends at Sheree's request.
At this moment, the sunny boy Richard, who loves his family and has many friends, has ceased to exist.
To this day, looking back on the day he married Sheree in December 2009, Richard still thinks it was wonderful.
Although at that time he heeded Sheree's words and sneaked to Thailand for a wedding ceremony under the pretext of vacation. There were no relatives or friends at the scene, and no blessings were received.
And on the wedding day, Sheree was drunk, punched the makeup artist and ordered the other party to get out.
But he still found an excuse for Sheree and comforted himself that Sheree must have done it because it was too stressful to get married.
Richard naively thought that the palace of marriage could be a new starting point for the two.
He hoped that Sheree would change, but all he had to wait for was her to change.
Because Sheree desperately wanted to have children, she failed to do so, so she transferred all the pressure and responsibility to Richard.
Before getting pregnant, she drew a flatbread: "As long as we have children, I will be very happy, and I will not mind that you work for so long." ”
She was furious again when she failed to get pregnant. Not only scolded Richard for "not being a man", but also laughed at his "size".
Under this suppression and brainwashing, Richard became more and more inferior, and even desperate to buy drugs such as Viagra online.
Sex has long ceased to be a pleasure for him, but has become a painful task.
But he believed so much in Sheree's pie that everything could be solved if they had children.
In this way, he kept moving towards that ethereal future.
Until 2015, they actually had a daughter. But...... Sheree still crushed his hopes.
She started working on Richard.
Knowing that Richard's work is related to the Internet and that the computer contains a lot of information, she will deliberately damage Richard's computer, forcing him to replace it with five or six, and finally hiding the computer in fear.
Of course, Sheree was also violent against Richard.
At first, Sheree would hit Richard on the head with a wine glass, causing him to get several stitches in a row.
Later, she beat him for hours, leaving him covered in bruises and finally relying on makeup to cover up his bruises.
What's even more infuriating is that Sheree will open the window schemingly, pretend that he was beaten, and shout outside: "Richard, don't hit me, you're hurting me!" ”
When the window is closed, she will show her hideous face again: "I told you, you can never beat me, I am much smarter than you." ”
But even so, Sheree wasn't satisfied.
She continued to torture Richard mentally and threatened him with her daughter: "I would smash her face into the mirror, disfigure her, and then call the police and say you did it, so you would never see her." ”
Perhaps worried about his daughter's safety, Richard began taking photos of his injuries, quietly leaving various pieces of evidence in case he needed them.
But in the process, he still has a glimmer of hope that Sheree will repent.
So when Sheree asked for a second child and painted bread with him again, Richard believed it.
"If we had another child, maybe we would be able to get through this."
This is ridiculous indeed.
But to this day, Richard himself can't tell why he gave Sheree the opportunity again and again without considering divorce.
Every night, he could only endure the pain while feeling deep guilt and despair.
He began to fear the arrival of tomorrow, but he was worried that if he died, he would have a negative impact on his family and children, so he could only choose to grit his teeth and bear it.
Originally, Richard thought that he might live like this for the rest of his life.
One day, Sheree gets drunk again and goes crazy and calls Tony, an old friend Richard hasn't seen in years, falsely claiming that Richard has abused her.
In fact, she just wanted to stink Richard's reputation, but she didn't expect that Tony was a gendarmerie, and out of professional habits and concern for his friends, he didn't believe it, but decided to come to the door to find out the truth.
Facing his old friend, Richard, who had an emotional breakdown, finally revealed everything.
He told Tony that the person who was abused was actually himself, and showed Tony the videos and photos he had taken earlier.
Seeing this, Tony immediately said: "As your friend, I have to do what I think is good for you and your children, even if you hate me now, I hope that in the future you will feel that this is the right choice." ”
He then called the police.
But when the police came to investigate, Richard still subconsciously defended Sheree.
It seems that over the years, it has become his habit to rationalize her atrocities.
But after seeing 36 videos, 43 photos and 9 audio recordings filled with a large number of sadistic images, the police immediately arrested Sheree.
Police also told Richard how Sheree reacted when he saw images of his violence:
They first deliberately played the silent picture, and Sheree thought that the video had no sound in the first place, so he wanted to lie and muddle through.
Later, the police showed the sound footage. But she just shrugged, without the slightest hint of remorse or apology.
At this moment, Richard finally saw clearly, or was finally willing to admit how bad the woman he had loved for half his life was.
After that, Richard finally made up his mind to end his deformed relationship with Sheree and formally filed a complaint with the police.
He also finally called his father and stepmother.
They immediately rushed to Richard's side. The moment he hugged his family and cried, Richard felt the warmth of his long-missed family.
Now, Richard bravely reveals his hellish encounter for more than two decades.
And his story also aroused the sympathy and anger of the majority of netizens:
"Well done Richard! Don't be ashamed... Take care of these children and show them your love well. You are not alone! You've had a horrible experience worse than most, but you've also helped a lot of people... I understand all these emotions and feelings that you have experienced. I've felt these too! Now I have peace and love in my life. Every word in your story touched my heartstrings... That feeling of shame, how did this come about? How can I protect my children while continuing to work... I wish you and your family a wonderful life and savor all kinds of happiness. ”
"His wife is disgusting. I hope he can find a good woman who is more worthy and reap happiness. For him and all other survivors of domestic violence, it's great to speak out about these experiences. ”
"I know exactly what he went through because the same thing happened between me and my ex-husband. Even after 25 years, what I've experienced still affects me. I don't have the self-confidence to think I'm worthless. I hope you can live a happy life, Richard and the kids. Keep telling yourself: It's not my fault. ”
"It's one of the most painful and memorable stories I've ever read. These injuries are terrible. She shouldn't have been released. Richard, if you are reading this, I am sorry and hope you can be healed in the love of your family. ”
Currently, Richard is working hard to get out of the haze with the help of his family.
However, he has also said that it may take many years for him to completely heal his mental wounds.
And now, he just wants to do his best to give his lovely daughters the calmest and most stable life before Sheree is released from prison.
They were also victims of this marriage.
"I can still hear the girls crying and I want to tell them that life shouldn't be like this."
But fortunately, the past has been marked with unbearable words.
In the future, Richard will strive for children to "thrive in a safe, secure family." ”
I also hope that all victims of domestic violence who have similar experiences to Richard can get rid of the torture as soon as possible and repair their inner scars.