Don't watch "London Family", single people want to get married after watching it, and divorced people want to remarry after reading it

Text | Thirteenth sister

Asking "what's the point of getting married" all day long is so boring, there is no point in getting married, what is the meaning of life, what is the meaning of living, to put it bluntly, it is a group of cells combined and endowed with different genes in the world, everything is this group of cells full to find something to do, in the final analysis, everyone comes to experience the suffering of the world and finally turns into ashes.

As a woman, I especially hate that some girls warn other girls all day long, "You shouldn't get married" or "You should blablabla", are you God or the Queen Mother.

It's good to let others choose by themselves, anyway, there is a high probability that no matter how you choose it, there will be regrets or regrets in the future... Everyone only lives a lifetime, why listen to you.

Now there are many female boxers on the Internet to educate everyone to look forward to the so-called "independent and dashing life" of "no men and no children", I don't know where they come from this confidence. Let's just say that in China, the proportion of women who can independently live comfortably does not exceed 1 in 10,000. Note that I say "too comfortable", not just "alive".

I know I'm going to be barred when I say that, and their idiomatic phrase is "You're going to die if you leave a man" or something. In fact, I don't know about others, but no one will die if I leave, I can live independently, there is no problem at all, my family is solid, wealth is free, thinking is independent, and the ability to live is also above most people. But even so, I still think it's nice to have my own home and my own loved ones, even if it's a lot of waste, but that's my choice.

This is exactly what independent women should be. The problem is the black-and-white boxers, whose concept of "family" is unusually vague, and their distorted interpretation of "independence" is a stain on the era.

But first of all, today I am a serious academic article, not here to quarrel.

Well, if I have to talk about "the meaning of marriage", I think it is "the meaning of home". Chinese children have always been rarely "educated in love", most of them only have "high scores" education, and the concept of "family" is actually very ignorant. The theory that marriage is to create a home for yourself is very straightforward, but rarely talked about.

But it is useless to say that no amount of theory, life is like this, the simpler the more real. I would like to recommend a British movie called "The London Family", which can probably explain what the real life of ordinary people who are in love and married, raise children, experience the difficulties and happiness of married life look like, and answer the ultimate philosophical question: what is the meaning of marriage.

It's an animated film where girls can watch and know what they might face after getting married, of course, just maybe, maybe the story you will face is much more wonderful than the movie. Boys should look at what basic qualities men need to have after forming a family to make the marriage better.

This is a video shared by the professor of my "Advanced Developmental Psychology" course, which contains many psychological themes and theories related to "lifelong development", and we watch it as a "teaching aid", but after watching it, I want to say that there are endless rich good films hidden under this blandness, which is worth sharing with more people.

I don't want to spoil, I can only say that this movie, which looks like a running account, has also become a sensation abroad, almost flatly and directly telling most of the family's life, but it has a lot of stamina.

Simple, simple, sad and happy, bitter and sweet, three meals and four seasons, twilight snow and white heads... Just like every ordinary person of us, they are quite poor, they have no noble occupation, their children are not very worry-free, their lives are not easy, and they have encountered social turmoil, the outbreak of war, hiding in Tibet, ups and downs, hardships, life and death decisions... When the general environment is quite bad, what is the meaning of small home, this is exactly its focus.

But what struck me even more about this film was that it made me start thinking about how we should educate our children to make choices about their future lives, and what abilities and qualifications they need to acquire to make choices.

Is it happier to have a partner and children, or is it happier to live alone?

Optimism, sunshine, kindness, tenacity, emotional stability, hard work, and empathy are the necessities for a good marriage. If I am such a person, and the other half is also such a person, then entering into marriage is likely to be better than a single life, because there is someone to share in joy, someone to rely on when you are in pain, someone to spend with you in difficult situations, and thoughts, hope... However, if the other half is not such a person, will the marriage still be happy?

Maybe everyone thinks they are very good, but they are afraid that they will not find a very good partner, so they dare not get married.

I don't want the next generation to start spurning the ordinary but potentially happy way of life, and one-sidedly and instigated to choose the so-called way of thinking that is in line with the current trend. We lacked this kind of dialectical independent thinking, thinking that we should consider marriage at a certain age; But now there are also some people who lack this kind of thinking, thinking that they must not consider marriage, otherwise they are asking for hardship.

They are all thousand-year-old foxes, and if you can't afford to play chatting fast, don't think you can become fine.

There is no need to dominate so many frameworks and theories, people with the right people naturally have the right people, and those who do not have themselves to appreciate themselves, and non-interference with each other is the best era.

What I hope more is that every child can understand one thing: plainness and suffering are the background of life, love and warmth are to beautify it, and ordinary people can also have the ability to get more love and happiness through their own values, cultivation and self-improvement and hard work in the background. Under this premise, the right marriage is our backer in the cosmic flood, not the mountain that crushes us.

The greater meaning of married life is not to pursue the maximum, but to focus on the minimum. The maximum value is to make you happier when you experience happiness, and the minimum value is to give you a bottom when you are confused and miserable.

The original picture book of "London Family" is also good

You can read with your child