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Text/A Zi
No matter how capable a person is outside, when he returns home, he is an ordinary wife or husband. In marriage, the maintenance of the relationship between husband and wife does not rely on the strength of individual ability, but on the unity and cooperation between each other, so that the relationship between the two can continue to develop.
The management of marriage, there is no comparison, only cooperation. Husbands can make money again, and without a wife to handle family affairs in the back, no matter how much money they make, they will lose their faces. Similarly, if the wife is very capable and the husband is averagely capable, but the husband is considerate of the wife and takes care of the family, his contribution and dedication are equal to the wife. It's just that the way two people contribute to the family is different.
Therefore, it is crucial to grasp the balance point in marriage. If you grasp it well, you will think in a different position and know how to understand each other's difficulties and difficulties. However, if the grasp is not good, the stronger party is raised very high, but the weaker party is degraded. Then, the relationship between husband and wife will be unbalanced, resulting in many contradictions and gaps.
In real marriage, the role of most couples will be "strong men and weak women" or "strong women and weak men". So, with such an unbalanced relationship, how should husband and wife get along?
The following is to share a story of "strong women and weak men", I believe that after everyone listens, they will have their own answers in their hearts.
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In Li Fen's family, the large house of 200 square meters, the cost of her daughter attending a private high school, and the cost of home decoration are basically borne by Li Fen.
In marriage, whoever has stronger financial ability usually has a relatively high status in the family. Li Fen's family is also like this, basically Li Fen has the final say.
Compared with Li Fen, her husband Haoming is very ordinary. He earns five thousand a month and is an ordinary employee of a company. Working five days and eight hours, the promotion space is also very limited. Plus Hao Ming is the kind of man who is content with the status quo. More than ten years later, he is still an ordinary middle-aged man who can no longer be ordinary.
The husband and wife relationship between Li Fen and Hao Ming is a typical example of "strong women and weak men".
At the beginning, Li Fen felt that she was busy with work, Haoming was relatively idle, and she could have more time to take care of her family, so she didn't say anything.
However, with the continuous extension of the time they spent together, coupled with his daily contact with many middle and high-level people, Li Fen began to slowly dislike Haoming's dangerous and short-sighted vision. Although the time for the two to meet is not much, the time has been long, and when the two meet, there are fewer and fewer topics that can be exchanged.
Li Fen is an impatient woman with a very bad temper. When she returned home, she moved the set of reprimands for her subordinates in the company to her home to treat Haoming.
Although Hao Ming plays the role of a cooked man in front of the family, Li Fen looks up to him more and more, and often mocks him for not showing up. Sometimes, Li Fen will also proudly say: "If this family does not earn money, relying on your five thousand yuan monthly salary alone, where can you afford to buy a 200-square-meter house, where can you afford to buy a good car, where can you live like this?" ”
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What Li Fen said is true, and Hao Ming also admits that in terms of economy, Li Fen has made a great contribution. Therefore, even if Li Fen's attitude towards Haoming is getting worse and worse, Haoming will still choose to silently endure Li Fen, not to respond to her, and not to argue with her.
However, one day, Haoming took out a divorce agreement and said to Li Fen: "For so long, you have always felt that this family is what you are paying, and you can't see my payment." I am tired. Let's get a divorce. ”
Li Fen thought that Haoming was joking with her and said to him: "I earn millions of dollars a year, you only earn five thousand a month, and you will regret the divorce." ”
However, Haoming seemed to have made a great determination and divorced Li Fen.
After the divorce, Li Fen wanted her daughter to live with her because she felt that she could provide better material conditions for her daughter. However, the daughter refused her request. The daughter said to her: "Mom, divorcing your father will be the biggest loss in your life, because you have lost a man who loves you." For so many years, you have never cared only about making money, not about this home. I want to live with my dad, and with him, I feel at home. ”
Listening to the words spoken by her teenage daughter, Li Fen suddenly felt that her heart was very uncomfortable.
Six months after the divorce, Li Fen suddenly felt that what her daughter had said to her was right. She is living in a luxurious and comfortable big house. But when she came home from every business trip, she was the only one in the empty house.
Back in the past, every time she came home from a business trip, Hao Ming would always carefully prepare a large table of delicious meals. Looking at the clean and tidy house, her tired body and mind will suddenly relax.
Although Hao Ming could not interject about her work, Hao Ming would always smile and patiently listen to her. Now that I think about it, everything that used to be so beautiful. This is the feeling of home!
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Because Li Fen has been traveling for a long time, her diet is not regular, and she has always had stomach pain. On a recent business trip, Li Fen's stomach disease was committed again. When she saw the last bag of stomach medicine in the suitcase and a small note written next to it, "Remember to eat on time", Li Fen's nose was sour, and tears "rushed" out.
Without Haoming's days, she didn't have a good life at all. She began to miss Haoming non-stop, wanted to remarry Haoming, and remarried as husband and wife.
Li Fen told Hao Ming about the request to remarry. Haoming still loves Li Fen, and with the matchmaking of his daughter, the two eventually remarried. After remarriage, Li Fen appropriately adjusted her work, reduced her workload, and bought more time to spend with her family.
In marriage, if a person with strong ability and a lot of money will have such a mentality, feeling that he is the one who pays the most money, then he will not care about the other half, disrespect, and even mock his cowardice. In fact, comparing your own strengths with the shortcomings of others, the sense of self-superiority in exchange for this is easy to hurt the feelings between husband and wife.
Just think, if there is no support from the other half, how can you make money outside with peace of mind? The relationship between husband and wife is more emphasis on the relationship of complementarity.
For example, li fen and Haoming's husband and wife, Li Fen has the ability to go out and make money and give the greatest support to the economic aspects of the family. And Haoming? His abilities are there, but he is equally contributing to the family because he takes care of the household chores and takes care of his wife and daughter.
Therefore, in terms of family contribution, husband and wife are all contributing money, but more or less, in different ways. Couples get along, there is no need to look down on the other half who makes less money because they make more money. You pay, I pay, and everyone works together to run the family better.
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