Text | Zhuying
"Let's divorce."
Zhang Rumei finally agreed to divorce, and also took the initiative to file for divorce, everyone breathed a sigh of relief, and the lawyers were celebrating that they had completed the case.
Sun Jianye's hanging heart finally fell, and he finally got his wish to be single again and could choose his marriage again.
Everyone is happy, only Zhang Rumei has endless loneliness in her heart, but she has to pretend not to care.
Thirty years of marriage
Zhang Rumei and Sun Jianye have been married for thirty years.
In thirty years of married life, Zhang Rumei spent almost in the snub of her husband for more than twenty years, and Sun Jianye filed for divorce very early, but all failed.
The first time was because of the child. The child was young, and the two agreed to divorce until the child was eighteen.
The second time was because of the old man. The child reached the age of eighteen, but Zhang Rumei's mother was sick, and Zhang Rumei did not want to make her mother sad and postponed the divorce.
The third time all the conditions were negotiated, but Zhang Rumei had a master tell her that she could not leave that year, so she postponed it again.
So judging from the above divorce process, Zhang Rumei never thought about divorce, and she made excuses again and again that she felt that there was love between herself and her husband, and their marriage could go on.
But all this is just wishful thinking on the part of Zhang Rumei.
Her husband Sun Jianye did not love her at a very early age, but she always felt that there was love between them, which was Zhang Rumei's greatest sorrow in this marriage.
In fact, she understands Zhang Rumei very well, because she accompanied her husband through nothing, accompanied him to start from scratch, and later she returned to the family and devoted herself to this family.
But suddenly one day her husband told her that there was no love between them, which made it difficult for Zhang Rumei to accept this reality, and also made her unable to accept the divorce of the two.
Because she did nothing wrong, and her husband had to abandon her when he became famous, which made her unwilling and made her very painful.
In this way, their marriage dragged on for thirty years, and during these thirty years, Sun Jianye slowly avoided Zhang Rumei, and finally separated.
Sun Jianye's career is getting better and better, while Zhang Rumei's marriage is becoming more and more unhappy, because she is becoming more and more lonely, both her husband and children hate her, and even hear her voice.
Unconsciously, in time, Zhang Rumei became an abhorrent and disgusting grudge.
All this is due to the unfortunate marriage that caused her current appearance, and she cannot communicate peacefully with her husband, because they quarrel as soon as they meet, and those quarrels hide too much of Zhang Rumei's grievances and loss.
But the pain in her heart, Sun Jianye has never really understood, because he doesn't love, so he doesn't care anymore.
Sun Jianye's unloved
Why does Sun Jianye insist on divorce?
Because he is not in love, because he has an affair, because the affair wants him to divorce, because he wants to be with another woman.
The reason is so realistic and cruel.
Sun Jianye said that he liked flowers, but Zhang Rumei was a tree, and the tree could not become a flower no matter how much effort he made.
In other words, Sun Jianye has never liked a woman like Zhang Rumei.
When Sun Jianye said the reason, Zuo Na asked him why he chose Zhang Rumei, who was originally a tree, when he was young, since he liked flowers?
Sun Jianye said: "People used to not know themselves, I used to think that I liked trees, but when I was my age, I felt that I didn't like trees."
In the beginning, she was strong, I thought it was good, I don't like women moaning and crooked without disease.
But later, she became stronger and stronger, more and more powerful, how to say, it is like a fire that burns more and more, burns more and more, roasts you, you don't run, you don't run and you will be buried in the fire. ”
In this regard, Sun Jianye just said that he didn't understand himself when he was young, and fluttered lightly to cover the mistake of this marriage, and also brought Zhang Rumei's affection for him lightly.
At first, he chose Zhang Rumei as his wife, and it was Zhang Rumei who accompanied him to start from scratch and bear children for him, but later he found that he never liked a woman like Zhang Rumei, and even he denied his choice when he was young, affirming the mistake of this marriage.
For Sun Jianye, he is a man, he can choose to start over again if he is not in love, but for Zhang Rumei, marriage is all she has, and the breakdown of marriage is a huge blow to her.
Zhang Rumei's relief
Finally, they finally sat down to talk with the help of a lawyer, and this time Zhang Rumei finally recognized the reality that her husband had long ceased to love her.
Thirty years of loveless marriage, long-term indifference, this moment she chose to let go and chose to let go.
In fact, Zhang Rumei let go I think it's a good thing, but at the same time, I also deeply sympathize with her, because of her relief, her letting go means that this thirty-year marriage is just a dream and a joke for her.
This is the saddest thing about Zhang Rumei.
The two were finally able to sit down and have a good conversation, and Zhang Rumei complained:
"I think just after giving birth to your son, you still come back every day, and then come back a little late, but what about you? It comes back a few times a month. ”
Yes, for Zhang Rumei, she is very aggrieved, she has done nothing wrong, but her husband is inexplicably far away from her, more and more indifferent to herself, and finally simply does not go home, which hides a huge grievance in her heart.
In response to Zhang Rumei's questioning, Sun Jianye explained: "At that time, the group encountered a huge crisis. A team was poached as a whole, the capital chain was broken, and the salary was only enough for one month. ”
Zhang Rumei asked, "Then why can't you tell me?" ”
Sun Jianye defended that he was afraid that she would worry, and Zhang Rumei knew that it was because Sun Jianye felt that even if he told her, he could not help.
Just when the two were about to quarrel, Pan Yan went in very cleverly and poured tea to adjust the atmosphere.
Zhang Rumei calmed down and continued: "During that time, you were temperamental and irritable, and you exploded as soon as I asked you, and I specially went to the company to ask. ”
At that time, Zhang Rumei did understand, but what she knew was limited, and not everything she knew.
Zhang Rumei continued: "Actually, do you remember? I have reminded you more than once that I said that if you are too tired, we will not do it, enough. I have a particularly low desire for materials, you say we have a house, a car, children, enough, but if it doesn't work, I will close the company. ”
Speaking of this, Sun Jianye said: "I am angry once you say it!" ”
Yes, there is a reason why Sun Jianye does not tell Zhang Rumei about the company, because his wife Zhang Rumei does not support his career, and it can even be said that the two of them are not the same kind of people in essence.
At this time, Zhang Rumei asked very incomprehensibly: "Why?" Did you already have someone outside at that time? ”
I have to say that a woman's sixth sense is very accurate, at that time, Sun Jianye did have someone, and to be precise, it was not the kind of bloody cheating junior.
He and the woman were like-minded, because they appreciated each other, because they shared common goals in their careers. They went from partners to life partners, and it can even be said that Zhang Rumei accompanied Sun Jianye to start from scratch, but that woman accompanied Sun Jianye through the dark moments of his career and took his career to a higher level.
At that time, Sun Jianye's company encountered a crisis and went home to tell his wife that his wife told him to give up, but the woman had been accompanying him, helping him, and helping him revive his career.
In the end, slowly Zhang Rumei and Sun Jianye completely became people in two worlds.
Later, with the help of Pan Chen, Sun Jianye admitted that he had an affair, saying: "How to tell you, there was indeed such a person at that time, but it was definitely not the kind of relationship you imagined." She helped me borrow money, helped me find someone, and she told me, you can't lie down, you have to hold on. ”
Yes, at the beginning, the two were indeed not emotional, just partners, but later they were moved, and they experienced too much in time and had feelings.
Zhang Rumei listened and asked, "Why should she help you?" Why would she lend you money to find someone? ”
Sun Jianye said: "She saw that I was a person who did things. ”
Yes, that woman appreciates Sun Jianye's talent and agrees with his view of career, Zhang Rumei said that the woman is gambling, she is indeed gambling.
But she still won the bet, because Sun Jianye still fell in love with her in the end, whether it was gratitude, or moved, or really liked, and in the end there was no doubt that Sun Jianye fell in love with her, and she won the bet.
Zhang Rumei asked Sun Jianye to close the company every day, because she felt sorry for him and worried that he was too tired, Zhang Rumei is a woman who is easily content, she does not seek great wealth and nobility, but only hopes that her husband can accompany her to live a small life.
But Sun Jianye is not this kind of person, it can be said that from the beginning she knew that Sun Jianye was not this kind of person and could not give her this kind of life, but she still fell into it.
Finally, Sun Jianye said: "It's my fault, you should really find someone who can accompany you all the time, accompany you to walk your dog, accompany you to visit the mall, accompany you to live a small life, understand life, can plant trees and raise flowers, I am not that kind of person." ”
Yes, the most fundamental reason for their marriage is because Sun Jianye has never been able to give Zhang Rumei the married life she wants, and Zhang Rumei can't give Sun Jianye the support she wants.
Zhang Rumei said: "Then why didn't you say it earlier? ”
Sun Jianye: "I can't say it. ”
Zhang Rumei: "Then why did you say it now?" ”
Sun Jianye: "Because we had already quarreled before we talked about it.
I'm not the one who can accompany you to breakfast, lunch, dinner. Not only can't I accompany you, I can't accompany anyone, I'm not that type of person.
Sometimes it's painful to think about me, I will always miss your good, you don't like entrepreneurship, you follow me to start a business because I like you, in fact, you don't like it in your heart, so you are wronged.
You are a person who likes to live your life, someone to talk and laugh with you, I really want to hope that you, you can live the life you want. ”
Sun Jianye's words completely made Zhang Rumei recognize the reality, and at that moment she let go, relieved, and said: "Let's divorce." ”
Zhang Rumei was so uncomfortable at that moment, but she really realized the fact that Sun Jianye had not loved her for so many years, and realized that it was a mistake for her to choose this man to wronged herself from the beginning.
Her thirty-year marriage has only come to understand today, and it is both fortunate and unfortunate to let herself go.
Fortunately, they finally broke up peacefully and saw each other again, if not lovers, but relatives, and she finally let herself live the life she wanted.
Unfortunately, this kind of life came thirty years late, and the price of relief from thirty years of youth is too great.
How many thirty years can there be in life? How many women have Zhang Rumei's courage and luck to start over?
How to avoid Zhang Rumei's tragedy?
Zhang Rumei's marriage is undoubtedly a tragedy.
Her marriage went from passionate love at the beginning to indifference at the end, but the reality is that Sun Jianye never really loved her.
When we are young, perhaps we all make mistakes, do not understand ourselves, and choose the wrong partner, such as Sun Jianye chose Zhang Rumei.
We will also choose to wronged ourselves for the sake of our lover because of the love brain, give up the life we want, and make him happy, so Zhang Rumei chose to start a business with Sun Jianye, but from the bottom of her heart she didn't like entrepreneurship, what she wanted was always that kind of ordinary little life, but she wronged herself from the beginning.
In the end, she was wronged for a lifetime, and Zhang Rumei's fault was to wronged herself from the beginning.
Therefore, in the relationship, be cautious and cautious, especially in marriage, before getting married, you must first understand what kind of life you want in the future, what kind of life partner you want.
If you want to live an ordinary life, then you find someone who is as willing as you are to be ordinary in a small county; If you want to have a different life, then you need to find someone who is willing to work hard in the big city.
Don't be aggrieved because you like it at that time and don't want to be wronged, because people can wronged themselves for a while, but they can't wronged themselves for a lifetime.
So when love comes, when you are about to enter marriage, you may wish to ask if you want to live the same life and want the same future.
Some people may be suitable for love, but not necessarily for marriage, such as Sun Jianye and Zhang Rumei.
So I hope that all girls can understand themselves first, and then find the most suitable person to live your happy life.