22.04.21 10:00PM Miss you.
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The sweetness of love often makes people lose their minds. Many people would rather give up their careers, time, and circles in order to stay with their loved ones and make desperate bets.
However, giving everything you want may not be able to get what you want, and the more you obey a person, the more he does not know how to cherish.
As the writer Suzen said:
"If you take a person too seriously, it is easy for the other party not to take you seriously." When you never bear to refuse, the other party will start to snub you. ”
Running a relationship well is about the way, and sometimes rejecting these requests from the opposite sex makes him love you more.
01.
Refuse to build intimacy too quickly
There is a lyric in Tornado:
"Love comes too fast, like a tornado, inseparable from the storm circle, too late to escape."
In today's era of fast-food love, there are always some young men and women who rush to establish intimate relationships when they do not have a clear understanding of each other.
I thought that everything would be as beautiful as I imagined, but I plunged into it and was bruised all over my body.
Just like in "Ode to Joy", Qiu Yingying, who is simple and cute and a little silly, fell in love with her boss, Director Bai, but the other party invited her to eat fast food twice, and after sitting on the subway several times, she posted it upside down without hesitation.
Even before the two formally confirmed their relationship, Qiu Yingying agreed to the invitation of Director Bai to live together, and as a result, she was cheated of money and deceived, which affected the happiness of a lifetime.
Being together too quickly will run the risk of not knowing people; things that are too easy to get are destined not to be cherished.
In any relationship, we must correct our attitude, but also understand the principle of "doing something, not doing something".
Don't give yourself easily because of a whim or the other party's soft and hard bubbles, if you encounter a non-good person, if you are not careful, you will be damaged, physically and mentally injured.
Only by staying sober enough, rejecting unreasonable demands, and keeping your own bottom line can you win respect and be more worthy of being loved.
02.
Reject excessive dependency
Getting along with the opposite sex, being overly dependent or being depended upon, is a disaster.
In intimate relationships, in addition to women will unconsciously rely on the other half, in fact, many men will slowly rely on their lovers in life.
Moderate dependence can narrow the distance between each other and enhance feelings, but once excessive, it will inevitably lead to imbalance in the relationship and it is difficult to go far steadily.
When the TV series "A Tree of Peach Blossoms" was broadcast, many netizens said that the male protagonist Luo Yaohui was a proper "bottle man", getting married and decorating the house, buying home appliances, washing and cooking, living expenses... It was all done by the wife.
He had a car accident, his wife stayed up all night at the bedside to take care of him, but he spoke coldly, often like a child to his wife unreasonable, to meet all his requirements, a moment can not leave.
Blooming kindness and compromise, Luo Yaohui's excessive dependence and gratitude, eventually led to the end of their divorce. The best state for two people to be together is not to overbear or cling to, but to be able to support each other and achieve each other under the premise of maintaining their independence.
Good love, not only has the determination to share happiness and hardship, but also the righteousness of taking care of each other, in order to love each other on the long road of life, hand in hand with the white head.
03.
Refuse to give up your own independent circle
Love is fascinating, but it is also easy to get lost.
After many women get married, they become gentle and virtuous good wives, meticulous and good mothers, and they are bent on circling their small families.
Gradually, the contact with parents decreased, the relationship with friends faded, hobbies and interests were not adhered to, and even careers were delayed.
Day after day of tedious life, the in-laws' parents are short, the husband's occasional complaints and disputes will inevitably make you want some breathing and relaxing space, at this time you find that you do not even have a complainer, regret.
Love is never the whole of life.
You can love someone wholeheartedly, but don't give up your independent circle for him and put all your time and energy into men and family.
Because once he changes his mind and abandons you, you not only lose love, but also lose friends, and lose the ability to live alone.
Moreover, women who are independent and keep pace with the times are always more able to attract men's attention, return the focus of life to self-cultivation, and strive to improve themselves, so that you will be full of confidence and charm, and your feelings will be more energetic.
Good love is what makes you a better version of yourself, not losing yourself completely.
For the rest of your life, may you be a wise person, not trapped by emotions, not disturbed by others, seeing through and living beautifully.
Author | Uncle North
Source | Northgate Night Listening (ID: bmyeting)
Image | Network, if there is infringement, please contact in time to delete
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May you meet a better version of yourself
「Good Night」