When people reach middle age, most people will develop midlife anxiety, especially for women.
Generally at the age of 3, you may encounter the double attack of family and career.
Often at this time, the pressure faced by women will also be higher than that of men.
As adults, each of us has our own vulnerabilities.
It is often said that "to be a mother is to be rigid", but women are also the children of their own parents.
As the saying goes: "Wounds on the body are easy to heal, psychological wounds are difficult to heal." ”
I deeply agree with this, and the injuries that women have suffered, sometimes unwilling to reveal to the outside world, does not mean that their hearts will not be painful.
Women over the age of 3 often experience these 3 kinds of trauma.
1. Childhood is not taken care of by parents
There is a saying: "People who have a childhood will be happy all their lives, and people without childhood will heal their childhood all their lives." ”
It is true that the impact of childhood on everyone is far-reaching, but some people can walk out on their own, while some people can only spend their lives under the shadow of their original families.
Just like Su Mingyu in "All Is Good".
As an adult, she has her own career and successes.
However, her childhood was full of misfortune, and she would never be able to get the kind of love that her mother had for her two older brothers.
Therefore, after being admitted to college, in order to provide for his brothers to go to school, he could only apply for the teachers' college, and when he grew up, he had to pay his family every month.
It is as if he has not enjoyed the warmth of his family, but he still has to be "exploited" by his own family.
Such examples are not uncommon in real life.
The advent of a new era has made everyone begin to accept the concept of equality between men and women, but in remote places, there may be girls who are not yet underage, and they will lose the opportunity to drop out of school and have their families early.
Therefore, girls who grow up not only lack love, but also appear weak after encountering love.
Childhood wounds to women can be healed with love, but there will also be a long period of healing.
2, love is not understood by the partner
Women are in their early 2nd year and have just graduated from college, so they are often hurt in the face of all kinds of people and things in society.
Especially when it comes to falling in love, it may be that feelings that are not understood by the partner will make a woman cry to the point of collapse.
There is a saying: "Understanding others begins with understanding oneself, and understanding others begins with never seeking to be understood." ”
Deeply believed, this is the basic principle in love, you can love each other, but also, you can not forget to love yourself.
In "A Year Without Work", Da Yu and Song Zelin fell in love for 1 year, and Da Yu originally arranged a very romantic scene on Song Zelin's birthday.
However, a phone call made Heavy Rain leave his boyfriend and run to the company.
Song Zelin complained about this, feeling that his girlfriend was busy enough to have no time to date with himself, and even, usually, his life was still chopping and searching, and he was reluctant to spend money.
Obviously, there is no need to be overly frugal and frugal, but the heavy rain always uses the excuse of buying a house to make Song Zelin endure.
Therefore, in this lack of understanding of the relationship, Tang Rui took advantage of the void, causing Song Zelin to propose a breakup to The Heavy Rain.
At that time, Heavy Rain was facing a career, and even his boyfriend was robbed by others.
I have to say that in the relationship, it is really too difficult to meet a person who is worth trusting.
Sometimes, when we see a woman who is successful in her career, we will feel that she must be happily married.
In fact, this is just our own opinion.
Many times, when women are in love, they want to take care of their careers, and they often don't get the understanding of their partners.
Because, men's machismo, let them feel: women should not show their faces, and they need to use the success of their careers to make women worship themselves.
Such love will make women feel suffocated. Therefore, trauma that is not understood by the partner will become the last thing a woman wants to mention.
3. Social over-weakness and tolerance
There is a saying: "A moment of forbearance is called kindness, and a lifetime of forbearance is called cowardice." ”
I strongly agree with that.
Women over 3 years old, have seen a lot of people, and have gone through a lot of things.
Even if we reject useless socializing, it is inevitable that we will be overwhelmed by some social interactions.
Whether it is in the process of study or in the work, there will always be some people who do not know how to measure up and have to make progress.
Perhaps, the biggest mistake of women is to take kindness as a way to cater to the outside world, just blindly pleasing the other party, and forgetting to please themselves.
Excessive consumption in social interaction, for women, is a trauma that cannot be recognized.
Therefore, don't let your kindness become a chip for others to hurt themselves.
Being kind to yourself is also the best protection for yourself.
Xiaoyuan's message: When people reach middle age, youth is no more, and a woman's ability is her own confidence.
Perhaps, in the past, we have suffered many injuries, but these injuries should be our solid backing, not our reasons for rejecting the outside world and others.
We may not have been loved, but the people and things we encounter in the future are the most solid backing for us to grow up.
For the rest of your life, may you go all the way to the sun and be a wise woman.
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Topic: What trauma do you think middle-aged women generally have?
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