Wen | Purple Leaf Girl
When it comes to marriage, people who are not married always think that it is difficult to find a marriage partner, but they do not know that marriage is the simplest thing, and what is really difficult is that it is difficult to stay together after marriage.
The process of love and marriage is almost the same, and the only difference between the two is that love is romantic, and marriage is a day.
The same is that we all have to go through the period of love and the period of flatness, how much love, lost to the plain, and how many marriages, lost to the "seven-year itch".
Here, we have to praise Mr. Qian Zhongshu's book "Siege of the City", which can be described as a Chinese-style marriage textbook, but anyone who reads it can avoid the breakdown of marriage. Second, it can also avoid falling into the wrong marriage.
01 If two people can get married, they may wish to travel together for a month
In "The Siege of the City", Qian Zhongshu once wrote such a quote:
"The honeymoon trip after marriage is in reverse order, and it should be traveled together for a month, and after a month of boats and cars, the two parties have not yet seen through each other, disliked each other, have not quarreled and turned their faces, and maintained the original marriage contract, and such a couple promises that they will not divorce."
Almost all people get married, and they put their honeymoon after marriage to celebrate the two people entering the palace of marriage and cultivating the right results. This seemingly sweet and romantic trip, sometimes, only backfires.
Because, before marriage and after marriage travel, men's attitudes are completely different, at this time, it is also the most clear that this man, suitable for himself, can not marry each other.
Perhaps, some people do not approve, tourism, is a happy thing, even if there are unpleasant things, will be because of the happiness of tourism, forget all the troubles.
However, this is not the case, because the mood is not good, and there is no interest in even having fun.
Well, back to the point, why get married and go on your honeymoon?
The mood of the newlywed and the tourist is almost the same, at first the excitement, full of joy, but after a long time together, the problems of both sides are easily exposed.
Travel and marriage need to test a man's patience, whether the other party has you in his heart, whether he cares about you, whether he is willing to spend money, in the process of travel, it is easy to show.
On the contrary, if you are traveling after marriage, you have been married to the hand, and then you have discovered the shortcomings of the other party, and it is too late to regret it.
As the saying goes, see people's hearts for a long time, before getting married, as long as you hide your shortcomings a little, he in your eyes is all an advantage.
I remember someone once said that to see a person, you only need to look at four points: the control of emotions, the measurement of interests, whether there is love to take advantage of small advantages, and whether there is patience. Do you agree with it?
02 Marriage, not love twists and turns great is enough
Marriage, no need for great love, the parties are really suitable, no pressure is enough. Qian Zhongshu also said in "The Siege":
"Love is a twisted and great feeling, not so easy and simple. If this is the case, then love is so easy that it does not believe it, and it is easy to make itself unconvinced. ”
Deeply believed, this great and tortuous love, seemingly very romantic, is actually like a dream;
Love, can not imagine too beautiful, how much love, after entering the marriage, there is a "married to another person" like the illusion. Besides, how many marriages, can withstand the blandness, you can ensure the perfect love, after marriage will not be a chicken feather.
A good marriage is the first time to see the joy, not tired for a long time, travel for a month, at first is excited, halfway will be tired, the back will be tired, these three stages experienced, you can see clearly, two people are not suitable for together, suitable for marriage.
03 The author's emotional summary
In love, all romance, in the end, is nothing more than chai rice oil and salt; do not take the romance of love as a lifelong determination, a good marriage, is the need to see how bad he is to you when he is not good.
Woman's heart, the needle under the sea, the man's heart, the soul needle, whether the man is sincere or hypocritical, relying solely on the communication of three words and two words, it is not as good as a long time;
Why many couples can't go to the end after living together, some men shout love in their mouths, just want to get you, once they get it, it may be another face.
Marriage, like the siege of the city, is always between gains and losses, like the new and tired of the old in and out, if you do not see a person, hastily enter the marriage, it is easy to meet the "Siege" in the same way as Fang Hongwei, marriage, and eventually fail.