At a party some time ago, a married little sister complained to us: It is too difficult to live with my mother-in-law, no matter how I do it, I will be told, and how to do it is wrong.
For some mothers-in-law, it seems that they are born to deal with their daughter-in-law, no matter what kind of temperament and personality the daughter-in-law is, in the eyes of the mother-in-law, it is impossible to fall behind.
If we meet such a mother-in-law, then we just need to be unashamed and do our duty as a daughter-in-law.
With such a mother-in-law, the more you please her, the more you do not put you in the eyes, sometimes a daughter-in-law with a bad temper, but can still get the respect of this mother-in-law.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is sometimes too much and not a good thing. Don't want to be so intimate as mother and daughter to be unscrupulous, what to say, because if you really do that, in the end it is very likely that you will find that all your sincerity has been wasted, and the other party has not paid attention to it.
Some people say that a woman who is a mother-in-law and a woman who is a daughter-in-law, why do the two of them get together? In the final analysis, it was only because of the common man, the son of the mother-in-law, the husband of the daughter-in-law.
Because of this man, even two women who are no longer in a good relationship must become a family and live together, which will naturally have a lot of contradictions to happen, which is inevitable.
Therefore, if you can, it is better to try to live separately between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, give the husband and wife two independent space, give them enough world for two, and also help the operation and happiness of marriage.
If the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live under the same roof, then it is enough to remember a truth, remembering that you are not related by blood, but do not forget your responsibilities and obligations.
Giving too much sincerity will not be respected, and thinking only about yourself will be scolded for being selfish, so how to find a balance is crucial. Stand in your original position, do your duty, don't go too far, and don't have to be too indifferent.
First, "the grumpy mother-in-law is seriously ill and bedridden, and the sister-in-law has not come to see it for half a year"
Ms. Fang's mother-in-law is a person with a short temper and is not easy to provoke, as a daughter-in-law, Ms. Fang, as early as the first few years of marriage, there were many unpleasant incidents with her mother-in-law.
The causes are some trivial things, but the mother-in-law said non-stop, and finally always have to break out a big war to stop, and finally Ms. Fang is really unbearable, and the husband discussed well, and the mother-in-law lived separately, and finally stopped the storm.
The husband has a younger brother, who was just married the year before, and the sister-in-law is also a bad person. Shortly after getting married, Ms. Fang heard from her husband that her sister-in-law and her mother-in-law had quarreled several times, and on two occasions she even moved her hands.
Hearing this news, Ms. Fang only felt funny: It seems that my unproductive mother-in-law has now encountered hard stubble, and I really don't know who can tell the difference between her and her sister-in-law?
However, this year, the mother-in-law fell ill, and the doctor diagnosed that she needed to stay in bed for a long time, and at the same time, she had to have someone to take care of her, so that she could slowly recover.
Originally, Ms. Fang and her husband planned to discuss this matter with their brother, and it was better for the two families to take turns to take care of their mother-in-law, but the sister-in-law directly refused. Ms. Fang can guess that because she and her mother-in-law have a bad relationship, she is naturally unwilling to take on the responsibility of taking care of her mother-in-law.
There was no way, but Ms. Fang had to do it herself. During the day, the couple hired a nurse to take care of the elderly, and when they returned home at night, Ms. Fang took over, scrubbed her mother-in-law's body, fed her food, pinched her arms and legs, and chatted with her to relieve boredom.
At first, the mother-in-law's attitude still improved, but in the end, the personality will not change there, and after a long time, the mother-in-law's violent temper will rise again.
Several times Ms. Fang couldn't stand it, and said to her husband, or let her brother and daughter-in-law take her mother-in-law away, and I also wanted to be quiet and quiet, rest for a while.
The husband was also very embarrassed, he said: "I asked them about this some time ago, my sister-in-law is still that attitude, dead or alive are not willing, but also put words,
If we really sent our mother over, she would really dare to ignore it. No, my mother has been ill for more than half a year, and she has never looked at it. ”
Second, "You are sick, the person who takes care of you is me, why can't I get a little better?"
The sister-in-law is not willing to take care of her mother-in-law, so the pressure has to fall on ms. Fang's shoulders.
Over the past few days, Ms. Fang and her husband have paid and contributed, and Ms. Fang herself has been taking care of the elderly for a long time, which has also affected the energy of daytime work, and several times she has slept late in the morning, and she has also been criticized by the leadership.
The key mother-in-law still can't think of Ms. Fang's good, more and more arbitrary and unreasonable, fighting on the bed is inconvenient to move, a mouth is more and more arbitrary, several times to scold Ms. Fang shed tears.
Once, just because she hated Ms. Fang's porridge and there was still some heat in her mouth, the mother-in-law directly waved the bowl over, spilled Ms. Fang's body, and still scolded and grinned there, saying: "My illness is for you to give me gas out, and sooner or later I will be killed by you."
”
The husband couldn't stand it anymore, dragged Ms. Fang behind him, and accused her mother-in-law, "Do you have any heart?" Who has been taking care of you for more than half a year since you were sick? It is our family that pays for it, it is my daughter-in-law who serves you meticulously, why do you still talk so hurtfully? ”
Ms. Fang also sighed and said, "Mom, since I can't take care of you so well, and you still think that I haven't done anything good enough, I'll call my sister-in-law tomorrow and ask her to pick you up."
You don't always think that I have a good temper and take me out of anger, when you were in good health, I never heard that you dared to deliberately find trouble for your sister-in-law and quarrel with her, how did you get to me, you bullied me vigorously? ”
Hearing Ms. Fang talk about her little daughter-in-law, the mother-in-law suddenly lost her temper, and it took half a day before she said stunnedly: "Don't send me to her, I won't be angry with you in the future?" If you had sent me over, she wouldn't have abused me like an adult. ”
The husband took advantage of the situation and said, "Mom, then from now on, you will miss her more and be kind to her."
Do you two daughters-in-law have to offend one to be willing? You are now in need of someone to take care of yourself, so don't be so grumpy. Where are you dissatisfied, and we say well, we will also correct, everyone is a family, why do you have to get along so unpleasantly? ”
Don't unleash the greatest malice toward the person who loves you the most
What is the commonality of human beings? We will always habitually hurt the people closest to us, because only they are willing to be hurt by you.
Many people will say that this is nothing, and fight with people close to them, they will not really remember the revenge in their hearts, and then say two good words.
But such repeated injuries will one day make those who are really for you feel hurt, and when they are cold, it is like a cup of hot water slowly turning cold, and it is impossible to return to the original temperature in any case.
Ms. Fang's mother-in-law actually has a number in her heart, she has a bad temper, but in front of the same grumpy little daughter-in-law, she has some restraint, only when she is good at talking to Ms. Fang, she will always be fine, and the bones in the egg will quarrel with her.
But in fact, the mother-in-law herself is also very dependent on Ms. Fang, especially she is now lying sick in bed and needs to be taken care of, and her mouth is constantly disgusted, but if she is really tired of Ms. Fang and wants to leave, she will already clamor to leave.
Learn to give a little more kindness to the people around you, express your inner gratitude and gratitude, and let them know that their efforts are not in vain. Pass on some warmth to each other, then this feeling, whether it is love or affection, can be better developed and maintained.