1. There is a village chief in China, who absconded to the United States and has nothing to do, so he opened a private clinic and put a sign at the door, saying that the disease is cured and paid $500; if the treatment is not good, it is refunded $2000. There is one

1. There was a village chief in China who absconded to the United States and had nothing to do, so he opened a private clinic and put a sign at the door, saying that if the disease was cured, he would pay $500; if he could not be cured, he would return $2000. An American doctor saw the sign and thought it was a good opportunity to make money, so he decided to go to the village chief's clinic. American: I lost my sense of taste, and there was no taste in my mouth when I ate. Village Chief: Nurse, take box 22 of the medicine and drop three drops into the patient's mouth. American: Depend, it's gasoline! Village Chief: Congratulations, the sense of taste has been restored, pay $500. The American doctor had to pay and left unhappily. He returned to the clinic a few days later, intending to get the lost money back. American: I lost my memory, I couldn't remember anything. Village Chief: Nurse, take box 22 of the medicine and drop three drops into the patient's mouth. American: Oh, isn't this the last time it treated the taste of gasoline!? Village Chief: Congratulations, your memory is restored, please pay $500. The Americans had to pay again and left in anger. I returned to the clinic a few days later. American: My eyesight is very poor. Village Chief: Sorry! I don't have any medicine to cure this disease, this is refund your $2000... American: But it's only $800! Village Chief: Congratulations, your eyesight has been restored, please pay me $500... The Americans were not reconciled, and after a few months they went to the clinic again, saying that the ears could not hear. The village chief muttered to the nurse: This is trying to fight with us to the end, it is better to add some consumable medicine to the No. 22 medicine and let him go! The Americans listened and ran. The village chief caught him and said: Your hearing has been restored... Before the village chief could finish speaking, the Americans threw down three hundred and never came back. The next year, the American sat in a wheelchair and let the assistant push and go to the clinic, thinking that this time no matter what you say, I will pretend to be crazy and stupid, see how you treat the disease? Who knows, the village chief was overjoyed to see the situation, and quickly called the American's wife: Honey, your husband is forced to do this, what are we still sneaking around? The Americans heard this and grabbed the phone to question their wives. Who knew that the phone was not connected at all. The Americans are really crazy after admitting to paying the medical fee... ”

2. The brother-in-law is a programmer, and staying at home all day without going out has become a natural stay. One day, the brother-in-law came to the Porsche 4S shop to see the car. He pulled out 5,000 yuan in cash, patted the table and said, "I bought a Porsche." The salesman exclaimed, "Sir, you're kidding, this little down payment isn't enough." The brother-in-law said doubtfully: "Isn't it written on the outside that Porsche 5000?" Salesman: "Well, if you go out and go north, the company's Audi is only 100." ”?

3. I came home from work that night and then on the side of the road I saw a girl walking in front of me. I saw him with one foot on the teeth of the road, while the other foot was walking on the highway, just like this limping. I saw that she drank so much and was ready to go forward to take advantage, but I didn't expect it to be my sister-in-law, so I quickly stepped forward to support her: "Why do you drink so much?" The sister-in-law blushed and said, "Are you really sure I drank too much?" I cried and laughed: "Well, I'm sure!" Then my sister-in-law suddenly wrapped her nose around me and cried tearfully, "I just thought my legs were lame." ”

4. The abbot tells his daughter Fangfang a bedtime story: the cuckoo will lay eggs into the nests of other birds, then the other birds will think that they are their own children, and help the cuckoos raise their children! Daughter Fangfang suddenly interjected: Daddy, the cuckoo is so smart! The abbot laughed and teased Fangfang: Then I will also send your little troublemaker to someone else's house, so that you will not make me angry! As a result, her daughter Fangfang actually said: Maybe I was originally put in your house by someone else? The abbot was overwhelmed: This is too much of a blow to your father,!

5. The old man bought himself a Rolls-Royce Phantom on his 50th birthday and gave me bentley Bentayga to drive. I was driving out at noon today, passing a delicatessen, and I was going to buy some brine to eat. I asked my boss, "Boss, how does your cooked food taste?" Boss: "Dude, let's gossip less, the taste is not good!" "I saw that the boss was also a honest businessman, and immediately bought two pounds back." You don't say, the taste is really good, it is too salty, suddenly remembered the boss's sentence: "gossip less, gossip less talk!" ”

6. The brother discovered that his sister-in-law had secretly undergone birth control ring surgery in order to avoid giving birth to a second child. He was so angry that he divorced his sister-in-law. The sister-in-law was upset and planned to seek some comfort from the little nephew. The sister-in-law cried and cried: Son, your father and I are divorced, are you not going to comfort your mother? The little nephew said quietly: I think I want to comfort my father, my father is so ugly, it is not easy to find a daughter-in-law after divorce!

7. The radish stew I ate in the morning, I ate it with a fragrant one, and my son who watched it also ate a few more bites. At work, I didn't hold back on the bus and let out a loud fart. I quickly looked around and found that the wooden man had found me, and I was secretly happy. At this time, a buddy next to me patted me on the shoulder, "Brother, you are still urging the driver to hurry up." ”

8. A few days ago, the sister-in-law went on a blind date, and after the matchmaker asked the sister-in-law: How does it feel about the man? The sister-in-law said bluntly: Inappropriate! Come in and do it, can such a man still talk? Matchmaker: No, I see that people are quite gentlemanly, how can they do it? But people take the initiative to talk to you, you have nothing to say. Sister-in-law: Don't say anything to come in and do it, three times five divided by two dishes are all eaten by him, I haven't tasted it, how can I know the taste?

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