1, a couple snuggled in the park, the man saw that the woman's hair was very soft, he couldn't help but sneak a little, the woman said: "Oops! Nasty! The man listened to the heart more

1, a couple snuggled in the park, the man saw that the woman's hair was very soft, he couldn't help but sneak a little, the woman said: "Oops! Nasty! The man listened to the heart more itchy, so he sneaked a little, and the woman said: "Don't do it ~" The man's heart will fly up when he hears it, and he touches it again. Who knew that the woman suddenly stood up and said rudely, "Tell you not to touch it!" Don't touch it! Don't you understand people's words? The old lady's wig is about to fall off! ”

2. My brother had no experience when he took a plane once, and I heard that it was similar to taking the bus. On the day of departure, as soon as the cabin door opened, my brother rushed in and grabbed a seat. Then a man in sunglasses came up and said to me: You get down, this is my seat. I didn't say angrily: Roll! I grabbed it first! When the purser saw it, he also came over and said: Sir, I'm sorry, this is indeed his seat. I'm still a roll word. The man was on fire and shouted, "Okay, you flew the plane today!" "

3, there is a buddy who makes a loan to go on a blind date, go in to see the girl looks very good. So I planned to sit down and talk to my sister, who also had a good personality, and asked my buddies how they came. Dude: Take the bus, what about you? Girl: Electric car. The buddies wanted to send her after eating, and the last 2 met in the parking lot. Dude looked at the female A6, and then looked at his own X5 and smiled.

4, the family's old cow has just laid a litter of cubs, it only cares about eating its own feed, hungry cubs have been barking. I couldn't bear it, so I went and bought some cartons of pure milk to feed the calves. Now, when I pass by the bullpen, the calf will run over and look at me. If I stopped the calf, the cow rubbed me with its head and licked my hand with its tongue. The calf wouldn't be making me its mother, would it?

5, a brother noticed that his girlfriend and a strange man had recently gone very far, and they didn't feel quite right. So I directly found someone to block them in the hotel, and rushed up to the man to beat them up. Then the man felt aggrieved and called the police in front of everyone. Later, the buddies learned that the man and his girlfriend were originally husband and wife, and he was the third party...

6, I am the boss's assistant, a speech I have changed 7 times according to the director's intention, or did not pass. All night for several days, the 8th draft came out, and in the morning the director of the factory came to urge the draft, and in the panic, I handed over the first draft of my brother. But after half a day, I realized that I was holding the 8th draft and knocking on the door of the factory director's office with trepidation. Unexpectedly, in front of several subordinates, the director of the factory smiled and praised my speech draft for writing well and having a strong ability to comprehend it, which was much stronger than the previous drafts.

7, after work home, the door aunt sent my family a few crucian carp, my mother instructed me to scale the fish, clean the internal organs, clean, I am a little reluctant. My mother held out her hand for me to see, and there were two Band-Aids on her hand: "Girl, if your mother's hand is not injured, she will do it herself." When I had packed up the fish, my mother nodded with satisfaction and said to my father, "Our stupid girl is really a liar." "Saying that he took off the Band-Aid, he didn't do anything. I......?

8, my girlfriend is particularly anxious and beautiful, and her temper is particularly grumpy. After getting married, the girlfriend's temper has not been reduced by half a point, and the girlfriend and her husband have beaten her husband to a miserable end. At that party, I advised my girlfriends: Collect your temper, if such a good husband runs away, it will be too late to cry. The next day, her husband ran directly to my company to find me, and said to me with a frightened face: You go to persuade my family's mouth, what opinions do she have to say, after last night's quarrel, she actually took the initiative to apologize, scared me afraid to eat at home, afraid of being poisoned by her.

9, my wife's beautiful manager just moved to a new home, invited her to eat hot pot, I also followed. The female manager has a new teddy dog, and the wife wants to hold it, but she won't let it. In order to break the embarrassment, the female manager explained: You don't mind, it is afraid of life, do not let strangers touch it. A few more times I'll have to hold you. As soon as the words stopped, the teddy jumped on my thigh, rubbed me, and asked me to tickle it. At this time, my wife's eyes, like a cold winter, enveloped me, a murderous atmosphere!

10. In order to participate in the model catwalk, my cousin went to the store to buy high heels. The person who bought the shoes is a rich big sister, and the big sister is called a cold and noble ah. My cousin took a pair of high heels and asked her, "How much is this shoe for a pair?" The eldest sister said coldly, "300! The cousin bargained and said: "Cheaper, 150 sell or not?" Big sister: "Yes, do you want to have a left foot or a right foot?" ”

11, I sold breakfast, I sold breakfast for 10 years, and today I was completely hit by a girl. This morning a girl came to me to buy buns, she asked for 3 buns, I gave her 1, and she had to return them to me. I said, "Girl, this bun is for you, no money." The girl said, "Thanks, I'll eat 3." I looked at her and said, "Are you losing weight?" The girl said, "No, your buns are not delicious, and I can't eat up to 3." ”

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #