The female colleague went to withdraw the money, took ten thousand and vomited fifty thousand, she looked up at the monitoring! Counted ten thousand in the bag, and the rest was put on the cabinet and left! Half a month later, I received a telegram from the head of the legal department of the bank

The female colleague went to withdraw the money, took ten thousand and vomited fifty thousand, she looked up at the monitoring! Counted ten thousand in the bag, and the rest was put on the cabinet and left! Half a month later, I received a call from the head of the legal department of the bank, saying that I had gone to the court to sue him! The roommate scornfully said: "I just passed the judicial examination this year, I didn't take the money, and I have no obligation to keep it for you!" The supervisor was silent for a moment: "What you took away is the ten thousand of our bank, and the ten thousand that remains is yours." ”

2, my brother married his first love, after marriage life is very sweet. At noon today, my sister-in-law was coquettish to my brother: Husband, I saw Armani out of new clothes today, I haven't bought clothes much recently, I only bought so many sets in a few months, they are not enough to wear, people say that people rely on clothes, I wear good looks, you take out have face ... My brother understood in an instant, and said lightly: Say the point. Sister-in-law: 30,000 discounts.

3, yesterday with friends party, drink until twelve o'clock in the evening to go home. I woke up in the morning with a headache and wanted to pick up my phone to see the time. The result was stunned, and Liangjiu asked his wife strangely: Why did I spend the screen of my mobile phone?? The wife smiled and said: You have drunk too much for many days, grabbed the family erha for a while, and handed the mobile phone to the dog and said to it, are you very wronged?? Wronged you hit 110 ah, you fight ah!! Then, Erha was provoked to bite on the phone!!

4, the sister-in-law gave birth to 5 children, and finally gave birth to a big fat boy, the brother-in-law was very happy, in the high-end hotel to set up a banquet. After eating, I had a bit of a stomachache, so I went to the toilet and squatted down. It may be that the food is a bit braced, and I have been burping and can't control it at all. At this time, a brother next to him spoke: "Brother, they are all held up like this, do you still eat?" ”

5, Gan Dad drove the Maybach to take me to buy LV's new bag, I did not expect to meet Gan Dad's first love. Daddy pulled hard, tightly wrapped me in his arms, and the first love asked: Is this your girlfriend? How big is it? Me: 38! The first love didn't say a word and gave my dad a slap and said: I misread you! Then the head went away without looking back.

6. Dad used to be a senior executive of Evergrande Group, and received a bonus of 7.6 million yuan after retirement. He loved small animals so much that he bought a husky for $288,000. After dinner last night, I went out to walk my dog, and a beautiful woman with glowing eyes ran over and said, "Oh, it's so cute!" I smiled and said, "If you like pets so much, give them to you!" Beauty nodded her head, so I put the dog on the leash and said to the dog, "Goodbye, master!" ”

7, I and my wife have been married for five years, she and I discussed a shared bank card, each person paid a salary and then deposited 500 yuan in it. I hold the card, the password she sets, but no one can spend the money inside, and don't tell the children how much money is in it, and surprise them after death! On this day, I stumbled upon her to tie the card to Alipay and also to Taobao. As a result, I checked the balance and saw that there was still 12 dollars in the card! Wife, aren't you afraid that after we die, the children will not even burn the paper for us after seeing that there are only a few dollars?

8, my husband ran to drink with his buddies when he got off work, and I couldn't rest assured so I followed. Half drunk, they talked about what was particularly memorable, some said that they stepped on the snake on the toilet in the middle of the night, and some said that they met their ex-girlfriends on a blind date. My husband smiled and said: The most memorable thing is that my daughter-in-law and brother-in-law once went to my house. His buddies all laughed evilly and coaxed: Quick to say, how unforgettable? Who knew that the husband took a sip of wine, and Yu Yu said: My brother once saw the magic of makeup, and I saw my daughter-in-law's face after removing makeup.

#Funny# #搞笑段子 #