1, last night and the female boss hooked up drunk, I and her worship, known as brothers, and then she transferred 890,000 to me, early this morning she called me and said: "Honey, put."

1, last night and the female boss skewer drunk, I and her worship, to brotherhood, and then she transferred 890,000 to me, early this morning she called me and said: "Honey, give me money back, the company is left with some money, you take it all, the salary can not be sent!" "I noticed that she called me dear, is this trying to swindle the money back?" Didn't you say it was good to be a brother last night? Who knows, like this, this money I don't give her, she can beat me not?

2. The family suddenly lost power, and took advantage of the black to kiss the daughter-in-law, and the mother-in-law whispered: "Oh,...... Hate, don't make trouble..." I was stunned at once, why did I kiss the wrong person? I wanted to make sure it was the wrong kiss, so I touched my girlfriend's ass... The mother-in-law whispered again: "Why are you so annoying..." I thought to myself: "This is over, really kissed the wrong..." Embarrassed, I really wanted to find a seam to drill into... But obviously it's my girlfriend! I thought about it, anyway, I kissed it, touched it... Before leaving, I asked my girlfriend: Did I kiss you just now? The girlfriend said, "Yeah, what's wrong?" I hurriedly said: It's all right... Rest assured,,, butt should not be wrong! ......

3. When I went to college, I was recognized as a school grass, and after graduation, I was raised by a rich old woman. She gave me 300,000 pocket money every month, and I had a happy little life. After work last night, I drove her Ferrari home. She was alone at home, afraid of gossip in the neighborhood, so I sent her downstairs and I was ready to leave. She saw that I insisted on leaving, so she had to give me a USB stick for me to take with me. You say I don't even have a computer, what's the use of wanting a USB stick??

4, I found that the people who do micro-business are really evil, a friend of mine is to make a fruit, said that eating can detoxify, but also sent me a box for me to try. I thought to myself, since it is free or sent by a friend, then eat it, as a result of eating one I have diarrhea, called to complain that he is detoxifying it, normal phenomenon, insist on eating, there is no toxin in the body, the result is now I dare not fart.

5, my wife opened a clothing store, the daily income is more than 10,000, and I look down on me all day long. I don't think I make much money, so I took a big order one day and made more than 10,000 yuan. I sighed and walked into my wife's clothing store: Wife, how much do you earn today? Wife: What happened to twenty thousand? Me: Uh-uh, it's okay, I'll just ask. Wife: Ask what to ask, the dish is bought, the room is packed, what should I do! Me: Oops, oops!

6. Dating your girlfriend for more than a month. In the evening, my brother once went to her house to meet her parents. A meet. Her dad told me to go to the balcony and talk. Say: Lad. You've only known each other for a month. Do you know each other? I took a deep breath of smoke and said: I don't know much about the specifics. Only to know that she likes to grind her teeth when she sleeps. There is a scar on the thigh. child. Cold outside. We said inside. After entering the house, her father said to her mother: "The child is her mother." Our cabbage has made the pig arch...

7. The wife received the latest makeup technique at the beauty salon. Ten minutes later, her lips were bright red, and her eyes were very brightly smeared with eyeliner, eyeshadow, and mascara. She didn't know how the average person reacted to this outfit, so she put on her sunglasses and went home. Back home, his three-year-old son was playing outside the house, and his five-year-old brother was in the house. She decided to see how her eldest son reacted first, so she went into the house and took off her sunglasses. The eldest son looked at the mouth and stuttered, and after a while he said, "Mom, you are no longer like your mother." The wife asked very uneasily, "Shall I wash it all off?" The eldest son said, "No, let's go outside and scare my brother!" ”

8. The ex-wife of the father-in-law is pregnant and borrows money from the father-in-law to have a fetus. My father-in-law had no money, so he borrowed 5,000 yuan from me. At dinner in the evening, my father-in-law quietly pulled me to the bedroom and said: "Daughter-in-law, the last time I borrowed your 5,000 yuan, I can't take out so much for the time being, your mother is too strict." You can only repay the loan in installments. Me: "It's okay, family, don't use it." Father-in-law: "Daughter-in-law, really?" "Me: Really, I'll deduct 499 out of your son's 500 pocket money every month. father-in-law......

9. After graduating from high school, I worked as the general manager of my father's company. Every day in the company is to chase the drama, it is really boring, I drive Toyota out to carry passengers to pass the time. Picked up a couple at the entrance of the cinema. The man said, "Honey, you go back first, I'm going to go dark with my friends all night tonight." The girl didn't speak, a look of resentment. After arriving at the destination, the man got out of the car. The woman shouted at me, "Driver, go to the nearest hotel, and then you can collect the car." "I'm just a warm-hearted guy who runs out with one foot on the throttle. The man chased me for five whole streets!

10, the wife of the rich man is a very domineering person, usually to the rich are vicious words. Not long ago, the rich man's wife died because of an accident, and the rich man looked at the portrait of his wife and couldn't help but think of the scene when his wife scolded him before he died, and he gritted his teeth in hatred and raised his fist. At this moment, a sudden gust of wind blew and blew the relics up. The rich man hurriedly retracted his fist, accompanied by a smiley face, and said, "Stop anger, stop anger, I am joking with you!" ”

11. Female: Are there three suites? M: No! F: Are there Mercedes-Benz and BMW? M: No! F: Do you have a 7-digit deposit? M: No! F: So what do you have? M: I......... The woman turned and left. Suddenly the man said: I manage hundreds of people. There are many lawyers, professors, entrepreneurs, and many handsome women. The woman immediately turned back to hug the man's waist and said with adoration on her face: "Dead ghost, you didn't say it earlier, this is enough!" So what kind of company ceo are you? M: I'm the group leader. F: You roll me!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #