1, the daughter-in-law went to the night shift, came back late, I couldn't wait to sleep, in the middle of the night she just fell asleep, I got up and asked: "Who are you?" The daughter-in-law said, "You're stupid, I... Your daughter-in-law!! "Me

1, the daughter-in-law went to the night shift, came back late, I couldn't wait to sleep, in the middle of the night she just fell asleep, I got up and asked: "Who are you?" The daughter-in-law said, "You're stupid, I... Your daughter-in-law!! "I took a breath of cool air, and I was immediately scared, when I had a daughter-in-law, I don't know how." Subconsciously, I ran away with my legs, and as a result, I was pulled by my daughter-in-law and snapped two mouths, and I suddenly woke up and realized that I really had a daughter-in-law. I said, "Daughter-in-law, you wait, and I'll cook for you!" "The leftovers are not good, no matter how late my daughter-in-law comes back, as long as she is hungry, I will cook myself." That's right, I do have a daughter-in-law, I have to remember.

2. At night, the female supervisor said that the air conditioner in her house was broken, and asked me to go to her house to repair the computer, otherwise it would affect the mood to work overtime. I drove there, and after I went, the female manager said that the air conditioner was fine by herself, and asked me to see the copy she wrote. The female supervisor gave me a lesson and said: "We must learn to do things, for example, if you like to fish, you go to accompany the fishing, the leader likes to play mahjong, and if you like a person, you will..." I suddenly realized, taking advantage of the female supervisor's kung fu to go to the bathroom, I sent a message to the boss with the female supervisor's mobile phone, this time I want to be promoted and rich.

3. On this day, Mr. Came back from a business trip and said to his wife: Our stock, the vote changes too quickly. Mrs. : Did it go up or down? Sir: As soon as I take the plane straight stock, the price rises, and as soon as the plane I sit on lands on the stock, the price immediately falls!! Mrs. : Wow, now so advanced, the stock price is controlled by airplanes?? Sir: Then I can't help but come down?? Mrs. : For the sake of the shares, if the price can't come down, you can't come down!! Sir: What I'm worried about is not the stocks, the tickets, but the oil of the plane is gone.....

4. On this day, my wife was sent abroad by the boss to study for two days, and I suddenly felt that the whole person became brisk. I was looking for my brothers to play two handfuls of mahjong, but my father-in-law came and said he wanted to invite me to drink. There was no way, I could only greet him first, I couldn't drink his old wine worm at all, and after a while I was on my head and lying on the table very uncomfortable. In the confusion, I suddenly heard the voice of his phone call: "Daughter, the task is complete!" ”

5. Yesterday my girlfriend told me to take me to his house, so I spent a lot of money to buy a lot of gifts. When I got to my girlfriend's house, his mother wouldn't let us in, and she said that I didn't deserve her daughter. I rushed directly into my girlfriend's house and sat on the couch, and seriously said to her mother: "Auntie, I know that you look down on me, I have no house, no car, and no money, but I have a determination to give me three years, if not, don't need you to pick me up, I will go by myself, you will give me a chance, promise me to communicate with your daughter..." I said with my heart and lungs for more than an hour, saying that my girlfriend's mother was a handful of snot and a handful of tears, and kept saying: "I promise, I promise... Hurry up and put your shoes on!! ”"

6. After drying a bottle of Wuliangye, the brain became unconscious, and he actually called a Bentley Didi. In the pouring rain, we looked at each other for a long time, like the opening of a generation of grandmasters in a movie! I asked, "What about your car?" He asked me, "What about your Bentley?" Me: "Aren't you a Diddy driver?" He said, "Big brother, I'm Didi' drive!" ”

7, cousins are 30 years old, blind dates several times, the other party did not look at her. After the introduction of the matchmaker, the daughter is going on a blind date again, and I heard that the other party is a good boy. Third uncle: "You'd better tell the other person that I'll send you a house as a dowry." Cousin: "Why do you say that?" Third Uncle: "In this way, the chance of success will be higher!" ”

8. Last night I received a call from a friend saying that he was hospitalized, and I went to see him at noon today and asked what was going on? The buddies laughed bitterly and said: The night before the night at home to drink, a person drinking is not interesting, just pull the family dog to drink together, who knows that it is not good wine, drink too much and bite people... Oh, look at you like this, it seems that this dog's wine is really not good.?

9. After being introduced by the matchmaker, I went on a blind date. After the meeting, I had a good conversation with the woman, that is, the matchmaker fidgeted and watched the time from time to time. After the meeting, the matchmaker went to the bathroom, and the woman also stood up to leave, and I was busy asking for contact information. The woman laughed and said: You are a good person, I will not lie to you, this matchmaker is my mother-in-law, the girl who originally dated you went with someone else, my mother-in-law did not want to smash the signboard, nor did she want to miss the red packet, so I came...

10, the buddy's girlfriend was unmarried and pregnant, the buddy did not want to be responsible and ran away, I saw that she was very pitiful, so I spent 80,000 dowry to marry her home.

11. This weekend, a brother goes out to have an emergency, and the roommate rests at home. Dude: Don't go anywhere for a while, your sister downstairs will come to you. The roommate woke up with excitement and quickly got up to clean up. After a while, the girl really came up. The girl carried a down jacket and roared: Finally come back, this is your balcony fell down the cigarette butt burned, this down jacket I just bought a week, how to lose it?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #