I live in the Tomson Yipin neighborhood, there is a breakfast shop downstairs, the owner is very good to me. When I was a child, I went to school, and the boss would give me an egg and a bun and a bottle of AD calcium milk every day! after

I live in the Tomson Yipin neighborhood, there is a breakfast shop downstairs, the owner is very good to me. When I was a child, I went to school, and the boss would give me an egg and a bun and a bottle of AD calcium milk every day! Later, when I grew up and never had a girlfriend, the boss said, "I have two daughters, you choose one to get married!" I was stunned and asked, "Uncle, why are you so good to me?" He said, "Actually, your mom was my first love, and then we broke up!" I still like her, so I went downstairs to your house and opened a breakfast restaurant, and for so many years, I have been taking you as my own son! ”

2, Zhang San has felt that he is not biological since he was a child. Once when he was playing outside and accidentally fell into the pit, her mother saw it and said, "We don't want this child!" Go back and have another one. Later, when she grew up and had a high fever, her mother touched his forehead with her hand, immediately retracted her hand and said, "It's hot!" His father immediately looked at him with a blank stare and said, "Look at your mother's hot!" "Is this pro?????

3, mistakenly hit and bumped into the pursuit of the boss lady, was fired by the boss under the anger. Within days of being unemployed, I went to a new company for an interview. The interviewer asked me, "Which unit have you spent the longest time?" I thought for a moment and said, "I spent six years in the middle school in town. The interviewer asked curiously, "Then why don't you write on your resume that you were a teacher?" I smiled and said, "That's because I went to school there!" ”

4. Me: Why do I have a fever? Immune system: because I'm sick! Me: Why did you have a fever? Immune system: because the virus does not live long at 40 ° C. Me: But I don't live long at 40°C. Immune System: I admit I have the ingredients to gamble, but today you and the virus must die one!

5, once a few brothers played mahjong, played until the middle of the night no smoke, I proposed to pick up the front cigarette butts to smoke, at first they refused, and then really did not work to pick up, one person picked up a few long cigarette butts began to smoke, after they smoked, I silently took out a pack of cigarettes from my pocket!

6, some people are good to you, is first sweet and then bitter. At first you felt that love was dead, like glue, but in the end it became more and more faint, and soon broke up. Some people are slow-heat types, but the longer they can be exposed, the better they will be for you. Because the person who loves you in the beginning wants to get you. The person who loves you to the end wants to accompany you.

7) People who work together are more likely to have similar experiences and common positions, so they are more likely to become friends. Based on the eight-hour workday, colleagues can be said to be the people we spend the longest time together. It is not unreasonable to say that it is a long-term love affair. Looking up and not looking down, it will naturally give birth to friendship. However, true workplace friendships are not "pure". To say that it is impure is not a pejorative meaning. Rather, workplace friendship is like marriage, paying attention to the right door. The strong prefer to be friends with the strong.

8, giraffe said: Little rabbit, I really hope you can know how good it is to have a long neck. No matter what is delicious, when I eat it, it will slowly pass through my long neck, and the delicious food can be enjoyed for a long time. The little white rabbit looked at him expressionlessly. And, in the summer, the cool water slowly flowed through my long neck, it was so delicious. It's great to have a long neck! Little white rabbit, can you imagine? The little white rabbit said slowly, "Have you ever vomited?" ”

9, tomorrow is my birthday, my boyfriend booked a place at the Burj Al Arab Hotel in Dubai, today we started to leave early in the morning. After tossing and turning, we finally arrived in Dubai, when a Lincoln extension came to pick us up. I felt so happy that I fell asleep straight to the hotel. The next day, as soon as I woke up, I found that the room had been almost arranged by my boyfriend, who asked me to wash up quickly. The boyfriend lit a candle and asked me to make a wish, at which time the boyfriend said: No matter what you ask or wish, I will try my best to meet you. Me: I only have two little wishes right now... My boyfriend interrupted me: Shhh, it won't work to say it...

10, in the supermarket, a little Lori took my hand: "Uncle, you can send me home, I and my mother are separated." I asked her, "You're not afraid I'll sell you?" Lori said, "Mom said, ugly people are kind in heart."

1 I have a classmate Fei Ge, is a stunt flying car fan, has always dreamed of having a stunt motorcycle of his own, that time Fei Ge returned to the dormitory to dictate to us: "Today at the entrance of the supermarket, I saw a brother, looking old and handsome, with sunglasses, riding a particularly large motorcycle, buzzing, fast, feeling domineering, is ugly when lifting the ambulance... ＂

12, just talked about a girlfriend who opened a restaurant, less than a month gained thirty pounds. Walking home from work at night, I lost weight by the way, and when I arrived at the mouth of the alley, I found that there were parents beating their children. I pulled the frame, the parent said: Don't persuade me today, this little bunny cub can't fight, quietly take apart the firecrackers that people don't make a sound of marriage, pour out gunpowder, hide under the gas stove, just my father came to cook today, the sudden flame of a zhang, the old man directly burned into a bald head!

13, a friend looked at a questionnaire and asked me: "If you don't get online for two days at home, will you die?" I replied, "Yes." The friend said, "As for?! I said, "As for! If I can't fix it for such a long time, my wife will definitely beat me to death. ”

14. I worked diligently for two years, and finally got the appreciation of the chairman of the board and was promoted to the head of the department. Because I am usually too busy at work, I don't have time to find a partner. When I went on a blind date a few days ago, the man was quite handsome, and he was also very satisfied with me, saying that he wanted to take me home to show my parents. I twisted and squeezed to get into the car with him, got out of the car to see, and actually stopped at the door of "Home", what is this? I turned away angrily! Only the next day did I know that the original "home" was opened by his family...