Chamfort said: "Love is always more pleasant than marriage, just as fiction is always more pleasant than history." ”
When we really enter marriage, we will find that married life is not the happy two-person world we imagined. The actual married life is more complicated, more trivial, and there are many variables than we would expect it to be.
I often hear some married women complaining: "Men are really fickle, they are good to you when they are in love, and after marriage, they are exposed in their original form, and they don't care about you." ”
Such a description is not directed at all men, but the marriage that occurs in this situation, in the final analysis, is because the two people have not yet fully accepted the bland married life. Women expect men to be able to spoil her as much as they would when they are in love; and some men quickly lose interest in marriage after marriage because of the lack of freshness.
After a man gets married, when facing a dull life, if his heart is not firm enough, it is easy to have some other thoughts. The more men want freshness, the easier it is to betray the marriage. When "love" is regained outside of marriage, men will say that they have met "true love", and it is easy for women to believe that men are sincere when they hear men say such things.
In those relationships outside of marriage, as long as women believe in men's sincerity, they will feel that they can always give men freshness. Even if the relationship is not legitimate, there is always a way to keep it going.
In extramarital relationships, can a man's freshness really be maintained for a long time? In fact, for this question, many women think wrong.
Before that, we need to understand the problem of where the freshness of men comes from.
Xu Huanshan in the TV series "Thirty Only" originally had a happy and stable family. Although his wife, Gu Jia, is a stay-at-home mom, what she does every day goes far beyond being a stay-at-home mom. Gu Jia can not only take care of the family's affairs, but also keep Xu Huanshan in charge of the company.
It was also because Gu Jia was so good, in front of Gu Jia, Xu Huanshan could not feel the so-called worship. Therefore, when he met Lin Youyou, he had a sense of freshness in his heart, and it was also this feeling that made Xu Huanshan blindly produce feelings outside of marriage.
In the beginning of the period, although Xu Huanshan felt guilty about Gu Jia, he had to admit that he was also enjoying this relationship outside of marriage.
However, in the state of Lin Youyou's step-by-step pressing, Xu Huanshan was tired of this relationship and wanted to end this relationship as soon as possible. Even in the end, there is no trace of nostalgia at all, and I just want to quickly draw a line.
Xu Huanshan's experience is enough to tell us that in the relationship outside of marriage, how long a man's freshness can be maintained depends on the freedom that the woman gives him.
When a woman is willing to obey the man's mind and become a call-to-go, and will not disturb the love object of this marriage, the man has control, naturally will enjoy the relationship, and there will not be too much sense of crisis in his heart.
But when women lose control and begin to persecute men in various ways, men will feel that they do not have the freedom to control the relationship and pose a threat to their lives, and men will have no sense of freshness to women, and instead they will have a sense of crisis in their hearts.
It can be seen that the freshness of a man actually comes from the freedom of a relationship. The more good the control, the longer the freshness of the man can be maintained.
So, in extramarital love, a man's freshness depends on the woman's attitude towards the relationship. Once a woman makes all kinds of demands on men, threatening men's freedom, it means that the freshness of men has been lost.
Van Buller said: "Love is like wealth, it depends on the wheel of fate, it is always in a violent up and down bump." ”
For feelings outside of marriage, women also need to understand this. No matter what men have promised you and made promises, don't easily believe in men's sincerity.
Because for him, only by doing this can he deceive your true heart. If he doesn't have any sweet words, he has to pay something else to win your favor. Compared to those practical efforts, sweet talk is obviously lighthearted and much cheaper.
Even if he is nice to you and is willing to spend money for you, it is based on your willingness to hide in the shadows and not make any demands on him, or the demands you make, which he can easily meet.
Once your requirements are beyond his ability to embarrass him, he is not thinking about how to satisfy you, but how to end the relationship with you.
Do you think there has always been a sense of freshness between you, and that he must be genuinely in love with you if he is willing to betray his marriage? If a woman would think that way, it would be too stupid.
If he truly loves you, why would he let you live in the shadows and not give you a proper identity? If it is true love, he can end the marriage first, and then come to you generously.
If he is not willing to do this, but chooses to bind himself with extramarital love, it is only because he never thought of giving up his marriage.
Once your presence affects his marriage and his interests, he will only make one choice, and that is to give up on you decisively. The so-called freshness also disappeared after these things appeared.
In extramarital love, the woman should not be foolish to think that you can replace his other half, which can give him enough freshness in love. Your presence is only to give you a brief sense of freshness. If he is a long-term man, how can he easily betray the marriage?
Women should remember: when you meet a married man, don't get close to it easily; don't believe the sweet words and vows he says.