Sincerely exchanging true feelings and striving to be recognized is the minimum respect for the givers, and it is also the premise for us to invest in the true feelings.
Whether it is love or affection, we never skimp on our own efforts, but if this kindness and generosity are used by others, it is really a great sadness.
The world is uncertain, and the feelings between people should be two-way and cater to each other, if one party only knows how to take, it must be cold.
A family with both children and daughters should be very happy and harmonious. Although parents have to face more pressure, they have also gained double the liveliness and warmth.
Unfortunately, the phenomenon of "uneven end of a bowl of water" always exists, and the idea of "son preference" has always eroded the hearts of some people.
There is such a type of parent in life, they always regard their daughters as outsiders, and even regard their daughters' efforts as stepping stones for their sons' growth.
Reader Liu Hui (pseudonym) wrote to her parents that she was never loved by her parents, did not accompany her when she got married, and gave her father two thousand medicines a month after marriage, but later learned that her father secretly bought two apartments for her brother.
01. Although she has good grades and is very smart when she is young, Liu Hui's childhood is not very happy. Her parents often work outside the home, and in addition to taking care of herself, she also has to help take care of her brother.
Although she is better, her parents rarely mention her in front of outsiders, and Liu Hui can feel that the family's love for her brother is far greater than her own.
But she didn't mind, after all, as an older sister, it was right to let her brother go. She could have gone to college, but later chose to give up because her parents did not want to pay tuition.
By chance, Liu Hui followed her sister from the same village to work in other places. In the factory, she found a stable job and fell in love with Xiao Liang (pseudonym).
02. She was happy during that time, although her parents asked for some money from time to time, she was immersed in love and soon decided to get married and start a family.
His parents demanded a dowry of 80,000 yuan, but they did not have a penny to accompany the dowry. Liu Hui is very faceless, and even frequently disliked by her mother-in-law because of this matter.
But she didn't care much, on the one hand she was used to taking care of her family, on the other hand, her income had increased, so she gained a certain amount of respect.
Knowing that she made more money, the frequency of her parents' "complaints" also increased. Liu Hui was filial and obedient when he was young, so he always secretly subsidized his mother's family without her husband.
03. Buying a house after marriage, the down payment is still tens of thousands, Xiao Liang hopes that Liu Hui can come up with this money. But she had long promised her family to leave tens of thousands of yuan for her brother as a dowry, so she refused.
Because of this, the husband and wife had a fight, and she felt that she was right. Once back at her mother's house, she saw her father eating Chinese medicine to condition her body, and she was immediately distressed.
It is said that her daughter is her parents' little cotton jacket, and Liu Hui has been giving her family two thousand medicines a month since then. But the more generous you are, the more your parents ask for money.
She was caught in a dilemma, she was obviously not rich enough, and she did not buy a house, but she always couldn't bear to see her relatives bear a little grievance.
So every time when family affection and love face conflict, she always subconsciously chooses the former. Such an act caused her to quarrel constantly in her marriage.
04. Until a dinner party, the father said after drinking: "How stressed I am, I am saddled with a million loans, of course, I have to take some medicine to condition the body!" ”
As soon as this remark came out, Liu Hui still couldn't believe it, and after some questioning, he learned that his father had bought two apartments for his brother for many years, and the mortgage had always been paid back.
Counting down, the parents spent no less than two million for their brother, but they did not spend anything on themselves, which completely broke Liu Hui's heart. For a moment, she felt that her life had collapsed.
After Liu Hui woke up like a dream, she wanted to go home and theorize with her parents, and even wanted to fight for a suite, but she couldn't pull down her face, and she didn't know how to be good.
Emotional analysis:
The rest of her life is very long, everyone will grow up because of different experiences, from this matter, Liu Hui should be able to find the focus of life.
There is nothing wrong with caring for your loved ones, but you can't overdraft your love and marriage. After having a family, you must put the management of the relationship between husband and wife first.
First there is a small family, there is everyone, a smart woman, can distinguish between the heavy and the heavy, clear the priority, and properly handle the relationship between family and love.
As parents, we should learn to consider our children, and at a certain age, we can ask for it at the right time, but we can't blindly squeeze it.
Unequal treatment and patriarchy are tantamount to trampling on the trust of daughters. Such behavior is not only extremely unfair, but also hurts people's hearts.
For the rest of his life, may every child be treated kindly by his parents; for the rest of his life, may every elder be respected and cared for by his children. Only when the two generations understand each other can they harvest the warmth of the extended family.