In the world famous book "Pride and Prejudice", there is a sentence that is worth remembering for a lifetime: "Marriage that only considers money is absurd, and marriage without money is stupid." ”
Marriage is not the same as love, marriage is life, it is difficult for a woman to cook without rice, if people have no money, they cannot solve the basic problems of life such as food, clothing, shelter and transportation, and living is a problem, not to mention what wind and snow.
Some people say that talking about money hurts feelings, and talking about money is very vulgar, but it is unrealistic not to talk about money. In fact, in marriage, talking about money is not shameful at all, but a mature act.
If two people can talk about money before marriage, fit in the concept of money, after marriage, you can have a lot less disputes, if not fit, you can also find out in time that each other is not suitable, separate as soon as possible, so as not to feel regret after marriage.
Tu Lei once said: "Money is not the only criterion for testing true love, but money can measure the depth of feelings." ”
For example, people who tinker with the AA system in marriage, if the husband and wife both approve and are willing, it is better to say, but many people are forced AA, the purpose is not to let the other half spend their own money, in the money to calculate to this step, saying that they love each other, really can not be convincing.
What's more, on the one hand, with the other half AA in money, on the other hand, he hopes to AA only in money, that is, he hopes that you will not spend his money, but your contribution to the family can not be less, even, I hope that you can not spend his money, but also can take over the housework, have children, let him sit and enjoy his success, only because in the eyes of this selfish man, doing housework, having children, and honoring the elderly are all women's obligations, can not AA.
obligation? It is true that according to the traditional model of male and female protagonists, women need to have children and pay more in the family, but in that traditional model, do women need to go out to work to earn money?
To put it bluntly, what they are looking for is not a wife who shares their own happiness and hardships, but a free nanny who can solve their own expenses.
"If you still don't want a divorce, we'll see you in court!" My son is only 4 years old, my income is not low, enough to support my son, fight with me for custody, you have no chance of winning, I advise you to think about it, so get together and disperse. ”
In the face of her husband's request for peace, Ms. Zhong unceremoniously refused, and then began to consult a lawyer, preparing to face her husband in court and end the marriage of the two people.
The reason why Ms. Zhong is so desperate and refuses to give her husband a chance is because her husband has disappointed Ms. Zhong too much, and she has not seen the slightest hope of continuing to live.
01. The reason why my salary is low is because I need to take care of both career and family, but my mother-in-law and husband can't see it at all;
Ms. Zhong's marriage was defeated by the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and the AA system, and when the AA system was mentioned, Ms. Zhong felt extremely cold.
Her husband and she replaced the AA system a year ago, when Ms. Zhong's monthly salary was only more than three thousand, less than one-third of her husband's, so her husband and mother-in-law have always disliked Ms. Zhong, accusing Ms. Zhong of having a low income, making no contribution to the family, and spending money indiscriminately.
However, Ms. Zhong is also a college graduate, the ability is not bad, if she can concentrate on work, you can also get a high salary, Ms. Zhong's low income is because she found a nine-to-five, no need to work overtime.
"What can I do? My son is still so young that I can't take care of my family, and I have to set aside time to spend with my son. Moreover, although my husband has a high salary and can earn more than 10,000 a month, he not only works overtime is the norm, he is busy until more than ten o'clock in the evening to come back, and he often needs to travel, it is difficult to take a vacation, and it is very likely that he will receive a call and rush to the company. Does he have time to take care of his son? Does he have time for housework? ”
The husband needs to work hard for her career wholeheartedly, so Ms. Zhong can only sacrifice herself and set aside time to take care of the family. She needs to take care of her son, do housework, and improve her cooking skills, so that men can have delicious, nutritious meals to eat, to maintain good health, in fact, she is not easier than her husband.
"If he is good to me, considerate of me, respect my efforts, no matter how tired he is, it is worth it, after all, he can't work hard for the family alone, I sit on the side and enjoy his achievements and don't do anything!" However, he really made me feel cold. ”
02. My mother-in-law taught my son to mention AA to me, and what really made me feel cold was my husband;
After Ms. Zhong insisted on divorce, her mother-in-law did not call her less, hoping that she would change her mind, seeing that she could not enter the oil and salt, the mother-in-law was anxious, and questioned Ms. Zhong: "I have apologized, how are you?" ”
Listening to her mother-in-law's words, Ms. Zhong was even more angry, if it were not for her mother-in-law's wild entanglement, treating herself as an outsider, and instigating her husband, they would not have come to this step.
"Why do I need to sacrifice my career to take care of my family? I have a direct relationship with my mother-in-law, and in her eyes, I have always been an outsider. ”
Although the mother-in-law served Ms. Zhong to confinement, she was not so much here to serve the confinement, but rather to add to Ms. Zhong's blockage, during that period, the two of them were eager to quarrel every day, and the husband helped her relatives not to help, so that Ms. Zhong suffered a lot of grievances. When her son was 4 months old, her mother-in-law still lost her temper, saying that Ms. Zhong did not know good villains, returned to her hometown, and refused to take her grandson.
In desperation, Ms. Zhong had to invite her mother, take her son to the age of two, and then change the nine-to-five job to take care of the family as much as possible. However, the mother-in-law came to be a demon again, thinking that Ms. Zhong's income was low, and marrying her son suffered a loss, and kept making suggestions to her son to let her son AA with Ms. Zhong.
"If your son is a man and deserves my lifelong trust, he shouldn't listen to you, really mention AA to me, and implement AA alone in the face of my strong opposition." I do hate you, but it was he who really let me down. Can a man calculate with his wife to this point in terms of money, and he also deserves a wife? ”
03. My son was born in October, so why did you get a son for nothing?
The husband unilaterally imposed AA, which disappointed Ms. Zhong to the extreme, and what was even more excessive was that the husband did not want to spend a penny on herself, and hoped that Ms. Zhong would take care of her son, take care of the housework, and let her work hard with peace of mind as before, which made Ms. Zhong feel speechless.
On the one hand, she found a well-known early nursery and sent her son in, on the other hand, she quit the job that was low-paid but had free time, submitted her resume, participated in interviews, changed jobs, and spent a lot of time at work.
"My son I will take care of, but if you want to eat the food I cook, if you want me to do housework, there is no door, why is it only AA in money, and housework is not AA?" Have the ability, AA to the end. ”
The husband and mother-in-law are not convinced, and every day they quarrel with Ms. Zhong, and Ms. Zhong is too lazy to take care of them. In fact, Ms. Zhong has long been ready for divorce.
After the mother-in-law taught her son to mention AA to her daughter-in-law, Ms. Zhong's salary also rose a lot, and with the support of her mother's family, Ms. Zhong had full confidence that she could take care of her son, so she filed for divorce with her husband.
The daughter-in-law proposed divorce and took away the grandson, and the mother-in-law was naturally unhappy, and did not do it, and asked Ms. Zhong what she was doing.
"Marriage AA, of course I was born to me, is there a problem?" Son is your family? My son was born when I was pregnant in October, and I suffered so much for him, what did your son pay? Why do you belong to your house? ”
The husband and mother-in-law were dumbfounded, and refused to divorce, but Ms. Zhong had already made up her mind and returned to her mother's house with her son, and now she was preparing to hire a lawyer to confront the man in court and get back her own interests.
04. Women, giving up their careers for men, really don't deserve it.
Yishu also said such a passage: "Never underestimate the coldness of men when they break up, the most stupid thing for women is to give up their jobs for the so-called family, if they want to be independent in thought, they must first be financially independent, at least when they are scattered, they still have the ability to support themselves, and they can continue to live with dignity!" ”
Women, giving up their careers for men, really aren't worth it. Love can not be kept fresh for a lifetime, men can not let you rely on a lifetime, if you take your life to bet on his reliability for a lifetime, you will often lose a lot.
Instead of thinking about relying on men for a lifetime, it is better to improve yourself, make yourself better and better, and become your own dependence.
Improve yourself, if he is reliable, you can work with him hand in hand, two people work together to run the small family well, if he is unreliable, you at least have the ability to protect yourself.
END.
Today's topic: Do you think Ms. Zhong should insist on divorce? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.