01
A question for everyone: Do you think the bride price is not to give the woman her own money? If it is money given to the woman, is this money free for the woman to dispose of? In addition, is the bride price the joint property of the husband and wife?
I know that there is such a post, I hope this post can give the majority of girls a wake-up call.
"On the second day of receiving the license, my husband asked me to return the bride price to his parents, and after being rejected, I filed for divorce, what should I do?"
The female protagonist said that the man's parents' economic conditions were better than the woman's parents, and the two of them married the woman's parents and gave the little tens of thousands of dowries. The man bought the house four or five years before marriage, and the woman never mentioned adding a name to the house. Before marriage, the man did not say that the bride price should be returned to his parents, but the woman said that the bride price would be brought to the small family.
After they received the certificate, the woman brought the bride price and dowry to her small home, and she was ready to use it when she gave birth to a child and bought a car. However, the man felt that the small family and his parents were naturally also a family, so he asked the woman to take out the dowry money and return it to his parents for the wedding banquet.
They got along for a year and a half before receiving the license, the dowry was 150,0008, and all the dowry money was brought back to the small family after the marriage was agreed upon, as a backup fund for changing houses, buying a car and having children. About the conflict between the two of them: There is a disagreement on the bride price, to put it bluntly, the man does not agree with the woman taking the bride price, and feels that the woman has the bride price money and does not trust him. They were at odds over financial management, and the man said that he could agree to the woman's financial management, but the dowry money had to be returned to the parents first.
The latest development is that the woman believes that if she is allowed to manage the finances, she can refund the dowry of 100,000 yuan, and she will also add money to buy the car herself. But the problem is that the man does not agree, and the man insists on returning all the dowry money to his parents, and the men and women will become independent financially.
After reading it, I felt quite indignant, felt that this heroine was not worth it, all compromised to this, and even the man still did not agree, then what else to talk about? What is there to talk about, since the issue of the bride price is not properly discussed, two people divorce on the line, after the divorce can just refund your full bride price, but also save the man still worry about the woman's dowry.
It's really funny, the woman has agreed to return the bride price, and also the so-called bride price money is spent on the small family, the man is still so strong. Isn't that what the calculation is? Before marriage, the girl said yes, deceived the girl to get a license, and then the next day began to ask for dowry money, and the family did not agree to propose divorce.
Leave is away, who is afraid of whom.
It is really the big world, there is no wonder, so sensible girl meets a man who calculates her, in the face of such a man, do not hurry to run?
02
The male protagonist of the post is really cheap to take advantage of the big hair, on this he still feels that he suffers a loss, it is really enough! His pre-marital property had nothing to do with the woman, who also knew that this would not occupy his house, so she never proposed to add a name.
The man only gave 158,000 dowries, but the bride price woman brought back to the small family with the dowry given by her parents, and she prepared to keep the house and buy a car to have children later, which is a reserve fund, and this money must be spent on their two little families.
I really can't figure out what the man is not satisfied with.
Dare to love the man just want to marry a daughter-in-law without anything, where is there such a cheap thing under the heavens.
Besides, they were properly negotiated before marriage, and the two people were licensed to get married, now what do you want to get back? Is there a little spirit of contract that what you say doesn't count?
I have always felt that the bride price is given to the woman, it is the man who gives the woman a birth guarantee, in case the woman has no job because of pregnancy and childbirth, she at least has money to lean on. If you think about it, if the woman loses her job because she is pregnant, and the man does not give money at that time, how do you let her live. It is easy for the man to become a father, and he will not affect his work because of this, but women are different.
Since the dowry is spent to the woman's own money, it should also be decided by the woman herself.
"Strange Story" once had a debate: I am an independent woman, should I receive a bride price?
Professor Xue Zhaofeng said from the perspective of economics: "We have three keywords, one is independence, one is marriage contract, and the other is expectation. That's why I chose. We are social animals, we all have to rely on others for our lives, so how can we be independent? One of my own definitions is the contract of freedom, the expression of independence. If a girl wants to be a pilot, but can't have children in two years, she says yes, then she is an independent person, made an independent judgment, and entered into such a contract. True independence is the concept of true independence when you make a decision independently and perform the contract responsibly. Independent women should not be kidnapped by labels.
What is a marriage contract, the agreement is to sign a contract, but the marriage contract is more often a blank piece of paper. It's you saying "I do, and you're together." The bride price is not a sale, and in the future it is not a clear price, but the established result of the negotiation between the two parties. You don't agree or you can not sign a contract, no one forces you, all of which is the result of consultation between the two sides. ”
He believes that "in marriage, both men and women are equivalent to taking their own resources to run a business, and the resource packages given by men and women are not the same, with body, fertility, appearance, family relations, and their own future potential for growth." However, everyone is different, the resources given are different, and the time to function is different. Some people are a little earlier, some are a little later, and for now, it is usually women who pay early, pay their fertility, and focus their energy on raising the family. Most men are late in life, and the role does not rise until the age of 30-40.
This marriage is like a partnership, with one side doing the sowing and the other doing the fertilization and harvesting. The one who sows the seeds is the woman, and the one who fertilizes and harvests is the man, however, the person responsible for the harvest later, that is, the man who harvests, is easy to knock on the woman's bamboo bar. Therefore, before marriage, if the woman wants to ask the man to give a little mortgage (plus the house) to show it, to do a little protection for the future marriage, is this wrong, yes!
Professor Xue Zhaofeng suggested that women receive the bride price from the perspective of economics, after all, the woman's payment is not the same as the man's, there is a physiological difference, then she wants a little mortgage to the future marriage to do a little protection, which is not wrong in itself.
As long as this dowry is not a sky-high price, it is within a reasonable range, in fact, it can be accepted.
And how to deal with this money, since it is given to the woman, it should be left to the woman to solve it herself.
The heroine of the opening chapter is more sensible, bringing the bride price and dowry back to the small family, for the sake of improving the quality of life of their small family in the future, this money is the reserve fund for them to improve their living standards in the future. Unfortunately, the woman's kind intentions the man did not appreciate it, the man just felt that he had paid 158,000 dowries, and now that they have received the certificate, he naturally thinks that the dowry money can be returned.
The abacus is to play a clear door, to put it bluntly, that is, I don't want to spend a penny to get a wife, and I want to be independent economically. So please ask the woman to have children after marriage, is it difficult for you not to raise them as a father? After marriage, the economy is independent, is it difficult to have an AA system in the future life?
Such a boy should not get married, his behavior is to put it bluntly, that is, cheating marriage.
03
Some boys are really too chicken thieves, afraid of their own losses, in fact, he is the vested interest in the marriage.
What I want to say is that if this boy is nice to his wife, don't be so anxious, this money will end up spending on the two of them.
When you are married, you two are really a family, and you yourself must be withdrawn from the original family. But this boy just thinks that his parents have suffered losses, since you feel that your parents have suffered losses, then please work hard to earn money and filial piety to your parents, count on the woman's head, what is the matter.
Couples who are financially independent in marriage really should not get married.
I don't think it's necessary for the woman to ask the man to hand in his salary, but you have to have the right to know, and how you two manage the economy of the small family must be discussed. But the boy in the post is too strong, the woman does not agree to withdraw the bride price, he will mention divorce, and really don't think that you can threaten the woman, it is a big deal that the two people really left.
When I got married, it was equivalent to no bride price, my husband gave 30,000 yuan, and then this money was finally spent by me on decoration. We've been married for a few years, and I've worked hard to earn money to raise kids, but I'm willing to do it because he's worth it, and I'm willing to share it with him. If my husband was a very selfish scumbag, I would have divorced a long time ago, without hesitation.
Do women really care about the bride price? In fact, many women care more about the other person's heart for you. If you treat her well, this money will eventually be spent on your little family. But I still agree that women have their own small treasury, just in case your feelings change one day, it is better to arrange your future life with a little money in your hand.
We have to believe in love, believe in the men we love, but the problem is that sometimes reality is very face-slapping.
Well, I hope that women will polish their eyes when they get married, the bride price is within a reasonable range, we can also understand the difficulties of boys, but if they have been given, after receiving the certificate, they will be counted back, for such men, you should think clearly, weigh your own marriage, and do it yourself.
Today's Topic: What is the ultimate use of your bride price? Welcome to leave a message to discuss.
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★ Author: YIBAO; emotional original author, writing about the warm emotional affairs of this world.