01
We look at problems a lot of times and can't be too self-centered, otherwise you are likely to hurt and lose someone who loves you very much. Girls can be spoiled in love, but remember not to be pampered and proud, you must also be more considerate of the man who loves you, he is really not easy.
I saw a question on zhihu: near the wedding date, I mentioned a diamond ring, and my boyfriend was furious, was it too much?
And listen to my brief analysis: the heroine has been in love with her boyfriend for four years, has been licensed, her boyfriend has bought a house before marriage, his parents have made a 50% down payment, and the rest of the mortgage he repays himself. Since you have received the certificate and are husband and wife, regardless of whether the wedding is done or not, you are legally qualified and legal couples.
The female protagonist's boyfriend is more stressed during this time, one is that he has resigned and has not found a new job, and the other is that he is under the pressure of a mortgage, and he has no savings, and he has to rely on the help of his parents. This is really humiliating for a guy who has already started a family.
Their wedding date is coming, the male owner does not want to buy a diamond ring, feel that the diamond ring does not maintain value, there is no need to buy, mainly or the economic pressure is too great, he can not afford to give the female owner better, think nu work hard to buy two gold on the line. This is completely understandable to me, after all, how capable is it to do so much, why do you have to buy a diamond ring? Besides, the diamond ring is really not worth preserving, and it is of little use.
The heroine originally thought that it was okay not to buy a diamond ring, but one night she suddenly thought that "the diamond ring is a sign that directly proves that a person is married", she felt that there was no diamond ring is a loss, even the diamond ring is not bought, how to prove that she herself is married?
I think the logic of the heroine's thinking is a bit strange, is it difficult to buy a diamond ring to represent that you are married? What a strange logic. The diamond ring proves nothing, don't be fooled by some poisonous chicken soup. How to prove that you are married? Don't you have many forms? Is it difficult to advertise or directly say "you are married" with everyone's circle of friends?
The heroine said that she only mentioned the diamond ring, and then her boyfriend said a lot, but in my opinion, her boyfriend said nothing wrong. The heroine is indeed too pretentious, can't tell when, and is not particularly considerate, a bit of nonsense, unreasonable trouble.
Look carefully at these words said by her boyfriend, which will make people feel a little sad about this male protagonist.
They paid a dowry of 158,000, gave a dowry of 10,000 when they were engaged, bought a gold bracelet, and bought a diamond ring before the engagement, she was too small to wear. Her family will pay the same dowry and a county house, and the two families are equal in strength.
The strange thing about the heroine is that she does not understand where she is excessive? In her opinion, there is only one wedding, and how can it be too much to ask for a diamond ring only once for a wedding? She didn't understand why she just mentioned the diamond ring, and her boyfriend's reaction was so big.
What is the biggest problem with this heroine?
Obviously, he is already married, but he still calls her husband a boyfriend, and he has received a license, and he has not yet realized his married identity. She is not clear about her concept of "marriage", in her view, marriage means that there is a wedding, but it is not, marriage begins from the moment you get a license, and the wedding is just a ceremony.
02
YIBAO Emotion says:
Obviously, I am already married, but I still call my husband a boyfriend, which is also very interesting.
Listening to the respondent say this about her own situation, her husband really did not have any problems at all. Just get married, as for spending so much money? There is no need for this, you can exert as much energy as you can, and if you spend all your money when you get married, how will you live in the future.
Don't know what you're in?
My husband is in a turbulent period of changing jobs, and he has not found his next home? There is no savings, what do you have to spend more money? Both people are married, and they have to rely on their parents for help, which is really humiliating, adults, it is time to be self-reliant and self-reliant.
In addition, I will tell you the truth as a person who has come over: diamond rings are really useless, unless you are a mrs. Kuo who needs to show off.
Don't spend your money on useless ostentation and comparison, I've never worn a ring in six years of marriage, and I'm in trouble. How do others know my married identity, I will directly tell people ah, in addition, I have children, marriage is not very obvious? My husband also doesn't wear a ring, neither of us has the habit of wearing a ring, and we pick it up every day, which is strange and troublesome.
I only had one ring, a few thousand dollars, or Bought it when I was in love on a trip to Phuket, 4500 pieces, not a very good ring. After I bought it, I put it in a drawer, and I didn't wear it a few times, so I thought it was not cost-effective. I don't wear it much when I buy it, isn't it a waste? So we got married later, and we didn't have a wedding ring, and we didn't have three golds, and I was really not very interested in jewelry or something, and I just had one or two to wear occasionally. Especially after having children, jewelry is worn less.
Don't put "no diamond ring when you get married" on the line, because it is really not practical.
Don't have any comparison psychology when you get married, what marriage is only once, I must take it seriously, these are all poisonous chicken soup, you will not feel that you have lost.
Did you have a wedding? A lot of money has been spent, 158,000 bride price, 10,000 dowry and a gold bracelet at the time of engagement, and the man has given you enough. The man's pressure is also very great now, there is no job, no savings, and you have to rely on your parents, at this time, you are really not suitable for extravagance and waste.
Now that you have received the license, don't divide you and me anymore, you two are really a family.
If two people want to live a good life, they have to plan for the future, and they can't spend too much money on a wedding. Buying a 2 gold or 3 gold is also very good, there is no need to ask for a diamond ring, because this little thing feels that the other party is morally PUA you, you don't have to, it is you who think too much.
03
The essence of marriage
Many people are not clear about the nature of marriage.
Marriage is the two of you withdrawn from your respective original families, you form a newborn family, whether it is the dowry or dowry given to you by your parents, are the start-up funds of your small family. After receiving the certificate, it is a husband and wife in the true sense, you have to be husband and wife, face suffering and wind and rain together, you can face the difficulties and make the days better and better.
This is what it is, just because a diamond ring is so noisy, how will the future days be.
When we look at problems, we can't only think about ourselves, we also have to think about each other, and we have to reflect on ourselves from the perspective of a bystander to see if our behavior is really inappropriate. It's not that he doesn't give it to you, but that you do have financial difficulties after you live.
I analyze this problem today, I hope that more young couples can think more about each other when considering the problem, there are many people who will have a variety of small disputes when the "wedding date is coming", the more you have to understand each other at this time. Don't compare yourself with others, what the wedding will be like, just do your best. Don't care about the so-called face, the form of marriage, these are not important, what matters is how you define your wedding.
The thoughts of the parties are the most important.
I hope you can understand this, don't hurt your husband anymore, they are already married, and say boyfriend, it is really quite unusual. If you have money, you can go to extravagance and waste, if you have no money, or save a little, after all, the most important thing for you is that in the future, you have to live by yourself.
Today's topic: Do I have to buy a diamond ring to get married? Welcome to leave a message.
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★ Author: YIBAO; emotional original author, writing about the warm emotional affairs of this world.