Text/Su Xin
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I remember that there was a song in Mayday that had the lyrics like this: "If human faces all look the same, then you are different from people depending on how you live." ”
Whether a person lives happily or bitterly, whether he lives this life without complaint or regrets, or has regrets, completely depends on the person's attitude towards life.
The same is true of marriage. Some people think that marriage is a grave, but some people think that it is the destination, and how it is, depends on people's attitude towards it.
After a friend divorced, a person with a child to live hard, some people advised her to quickly find a man to marry, otherwise she should be alone how hard ah, some people say, not to marry can also be, but always have to find a man behind the back to help it.
When there are more such sounds, her friends are naturally annoyed, so she blocks out all kinds of sounds from the outside world, because she is ready to live alone in this life.
I remember watching such an interview, the reporter asked a longevity old man the maintenance secret, the old man mysteriously said to the reporter, want to live happily and long, her secret is four words: "Stay away from men." ”
Hearing her answer, the reporter was amused, but if you think about it, what she said is not reasonable?
I have also seen such a sentence on the Internet before: I wanted to find a man to shield you from the wind and rain, but who knows, the wind and rain in this life are all made by this man.
Yes, how many women, in love, are disappointed in men, and are desperate for marriage when they are alive?
I know a 60-year-old aunt who said that women no longer need men, often for these reasons:
01 Despair of marriage
There is a saying that without expectations, there is no disappointment.
I think every woman is full of expectations for it at the beginning of marriage. But not every woman is so lucky to meet a responsible man.
The aunt said that she had a good sister, and in the fifth year after marriage, the man betrayed his feelings, and the man told her that he did not want to divorce, and he hoped that the woman could give him the opportunity to change, but the woman did not want to live in a vacuum, knowing that there would be no more trust in the man, so why force herself to live in the marriage? So she chose divorce.
And the man also did enough desperately, after the divorce, he did not give a penny of child support to the woman and the child, so the woman was completely desperate for marriage.
But she did not sink because of this, she knew that a woman who put all her hopes on men would not end up too well, because she believed too much in the words fickle in the human heart.
So she decided to live again for herself, for the sake of her children, and live again.
Although her family repeatedly advised her to find a man to marry, she still insisted on her own ideas, and this persistence persisted until she was nearly 60 years old.
Some people say that she lives a little wronged, but she enjoys herself, because of the pressure, so she forced herself to continue to improve, she raised her children by her own ability, and at the same time forced herself to become a woman who can keep up with the times. After seeing the women who were bored because of family chores, she was even more determined in her choice.
In the end, it turns out that if some women can live well, she does not need to pin her hopes on men and marriage.
The failure of marriage is not terrible, the terrible thing is that you don't know how to live well, so if you are disappointed in marriage, then don't lose confidence in yourself.
02 Didn't meet the right person
Some people say that to get married, you must find the right person. But some people have not met the right person in their lives, should they find someone to live their lives, or should they be proud to be themselves?
A friend she met and divorced shortly after the flash marriage said she thought that a new beginning would make her forget her past hurts, but who she was with was really different.
Against her own heart, forcing herself to marry someone she doesn't like, the result is that every day in the marriage is suffering, and the facts also tell her that marriage is different from other things, other things can be done, but marriage is really impossible.
If you don't meet someone you really want to spend your life with, it's better to stay single, otherwise, it's irresponsible to others and yourself.
A classmate told me the story of her cousin, who was a very beautiful girl, and many boys in the class liked her, and the cousin also liked a particularly good boy. However, the boy's mother was very opposed, she felt that her cousin was not worthy of her son, and she broke up the two people.
Because she was too young at the time and always acted impulsively, her cousin chose to take a break from school in a huff, and later married a man she did not like.
She had thought that the boy who had once liked herself would be very heartbroken, but later she learned that the person who was most heartbroken was herself.
After getting married, her cousin was depressed all day, and her cousin was very patient at first to enlighten her, and later learned that her cousin married him for gambling, and that her heart was still loaded with others, and the cousin gradually lost patience and no longer cared about her.
My cousin exchanged her lifelong happiness for a painful lesson: Don't marry a man you don't like, otherwise you'll be joking about the happiness of a lifetime.
Many women, in fact, are not so lucky to meet a person they really like, but eventually they have also entered the marriage, but some people are indeed quite OK, in fact, they have met the right person, and there are some people, confused married, and finally confused themselves.
Maybe some women suddenly understand that if they really haven't met the right person, it's better to be single than to be single.
03 Marriage is no longer needed
There was a popular saying on the Internet for a while: "In these years, women make their own money, bring their own children, wash and cook everything, and why do they want to get married?" ”
Yeah, if men are no longer financially and spiritually dependent on women, then women really don't need to have this marriage anymore.
Girlfriends always complain that she works hard during the day to make money, has to accompany the children at night, and usually has to deal with a bunch of chores at home, while her husband, who is only responsible for taking care of other things in her small shop, does not care.
Moreover, what made her most desperate was that she had to pay half of the monthly living expenses of the family, and she also had to give some money to her in-laws. She said she could live the life of a single aristocrat before marriage, and after getting married she fell straight into the slums. Sometimes, she says she regrets getting married, and she doesn't know how long she's going to live, whether she's going to wait until her children graduate from college or if it's going on like this for the rest of her life.
Probably a considerable number of women live the life of a girlfriend, so many women would rather be single than enter into marriage, because they do not need marriage, and marriage cannot bring them the life they want.
Women's double independence, both financially and spiritually, has made them increasingly dependent on men and marriages, and if their world is abundant enough that even one person can live well, then marriage will hardly be a necessity for them anymore.
END.