On weekends, I rarely went out with my girlfriends and went to a nearby amusement park.
After the two arrived at the amusement park excitedly, my girlfriend was very entangled with the first project to play.
On the way here, we looked up the strategy on the Internet, and the must-play items were bumper cars, skyscrapers, and pendulums, and my girlfriend said that her colleague also recommended the rapids project.
But my girlfriend had a hard time choosing which project to start playing with.
I asked her which she would most like to play, and she considered a whole bunch of questions:
I think that when I first started playing, I should play something that is not very physical, so that I can play longer, but the projects have to queue, and I am afraid of wasting too much time on the queue, and there is no time to play fun projects later, what should I do?
But if you play these recommended projects at the beginning, in case it is not fun, isn't it a waste of time?
Also, I don't know which one I want to play the most, there are some projects that look fun, but maybe they are scary?
I don't know how to choose, and we rarely come here, if we choose the wrong project, won't we waste our time?
I didn't know what to do, so I had to accompany her there and struggle together.
After hesitating for 20 minutes, she finally made a decision and started the amusement park tour.
Let's not talk about whether we had fun on this trip, I think we will definitely have similar experiences in our lives:
Always look ahead before doing things, always want to make a right choice that will not regret, so think a lot, always hesitate, difficult to take a step, resulting in missed opportunities, regret in the heart.
Graduation is imminent, faced with the choice of whether to enter graduate school or enter the society, some students will make a choice early, while some are always entangled here, wanting to choose the most appropriate choice, hesitating for too long, not only missing the best period of internship, but also falling behind the preparation progress;
I can't start a relationship, it's not that I don't feel for each other, but I always feel that I can't easily open my mouth together, and I'm afraid of what to do if the other party is not good, not the right person. So in the entanglement and hesitation, the other party did not want to wait any longer, turned and left;
……
Standing at the crossroads of life, which path should you choose? Which path is the right one? How do you make sure you don't choose the wrong path?
To make sure we're on the right path, we look ahead, collect all kinds of information, and compare them one by one.
As everyone knows, when we consider the various options, others have already embarked on the journey and enjoyed the scenery along the way, and we ourselves are still slow to take a step, and life seems to be stuck.
We are always obsessed with the right and wrong of our choices, perhaps because we fail to take responsibility behind our choices.
Montessori put forward the idea of "spiritual embryo", believing that every child has a spiritual embryo, which hides the code of growth, which needs to be unlocked by the child's own actions, feelings and thinking, so that the spiritual embryo can develop and grow, and it is difficult to grow if it only relies on the external indoctrination of adults.
People whose mental embryos are well developed will eventually become a person with great independent judgment and rich creativity.
When children are growing up sensitively, parents always make various decisions on behalf of their children, which not only deprives children of their right to make their own decisions, but also cuts off the process of children's implementation of their own will, and eventually children will miss the opportunity to form independent consciousness and concepts.
Therefore, when I grow up, when I need to make my own decisions, I don't know how to choose, and I don't have the ability to face the responsibilities after making my own choices, so I am always afraid that I will choose the wrong one, and I just want to choose the right choice.
In addition, from a deeper level, just want to make the right choice, entangled in right or wrong, perhaps the inner death anxiety is at work.
Death anxiety, innate, is everywhere.
Further look at the psychology behind the right and wrong behaviors of entangled choices, these entangled hesitations are actually fearful:
Life is limited, time is precious, if I choose the wrong one, won't my life be wasted?
In order to let your limited life be used for the right things, you must make the right choice, so when making a choice, you must be careful and not choose casually.
In their eyes, if they choose the wrong one, then time will be wasted, life will have no meaning, and their hearts will experience the feeling of "not living".
And this will greatly stimulate our death anxiety, so we will struggle with the right or wrong choice to combat the fear of death.
Understand that life is limited, so you want to make the right choice, don't want to waste, but don't realize that most of your life is spent in entanglement and hesitation, and the rest of the time is regretting that you missed the time to make the right choice, so after taking the lesson, the next time will be more entangled and hesitant, spend more time, and enter a vicious circle.
And instead of dwelling on the right or wrong choice, it is better to change the concept and treat everything as an experience.
Seon lost his horse, and he knew that it was not a blessing. Even if you make the choice that feels right in the moment, no one can predict how the future will change.
On the contrary, after treating everything as an opportunity to experience, no matter how we choose, encountering good or bad becomes an experience of life.
And there is no right or wrong experience, good things we can experience happiness, bad things will experience frustration.
This is the most important thing in life; Five flavors, life is wonderful.
And when we are old and old, we can think of our colorful life experience, rather than endless chagrin and emptiness, isn't it enough?
Going back to the amusement park trip with my girlfriends, it turned out that no matter which project we chose to start with, there was a long queue, but we all felt that we had a good day.
On the way back, the girlfriend said, "It seems that it is not so important to choose which project to start playing, but it is important to have fun with friends." ”
If life always has to distinguish between right and wrong, how boring it should be~
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