1, go out to dinner, see a couple, the girl drank two glasses of wine and got drunk, confused and lying there. Then the guy ate a little and went to checkout, and the highlight was the woman's sudden upgrew

1, go out to dinner, see a couple, the girl drank two glasses of wine and got drunk, confused and lying there. Then the guy ate a little and went to checkout, and the highlight was that the woman suddenly got up! I ate a few pieces of meat on the table, and when I was done, I took out the lipstick and wiped my lips a few times, and then I lay down again, and I lay down... The city routine is deep, I want to go back to the countryside!

2, the cousin opened an Internet café and invested four million. Because I know my cousin very well, I recharged my ID card with 1 million yuan of Internet fees. I have nothing to do after work and will come to the internet, every time I swipe the card: ding! The card was successful, and the remaining 979,950,000 yuan was left. Every time the cashier's sister sees me, she is full of little stars! Until one day. That pretty front desk girl was my sister-in-law's cousin.

3. As a scum, I liked the class flowers and various pursuits when I started high school. With my efforts, Banhua finally relaxed and said: You will agree to you in the first three of the class. Since then, I have been studying hard, and finally I have taken the third place in my class in the final exam. Then, I didn't mention anything more about confessing to Banhua. The reason is that falling in love affects learning...

4. After graduation, I delivered a courier in Shunf and met a rich woman who lived in Bigui Garden. On this day, he accompanied the rich woman to hang out in the LV private custom shop and met his ex-girlfriend. The ex-girlfriend showed off: I am married, what about you? Presumably still alone, right? I looked at the rich woman with a distressed look, who expected her to understand in seconds. Rich woman wrapped me up, dear, people want to buy that global limited edition of the bag! Isn't that nice! Haha, only to see the ex-girlfriend's face immediately blackened.

5. An old man at the east end of our village loves to drink, and every day he is drunk and drunk, and his wife pulls his ears and goes home. On this day, he sneaked out again to buy a bottle of two pot heads. Who knew that he was tripped by a stone on the way and slipped a foot. He felt wet on his legs, thought he had broken the bottle, and felt very sad. But when he looked at it, he laughed and said, thank goodness, it was just blood flowing from his legs.

6, last night a few buddies party, are drunk drunk, on the intermission, I took the mobile phone to play a meeting, the result was found that there is a red envelope in the colleague group no one grabbed, they did not hesitate to point in, open a look is actually 1000 yuan red packet. I thought: This is a big profit. After two minutes, a female colleague took the initiative to send a message saying: Brother, you must abide by the agreement.

7. I was working when I suddenly received a call from my wife. The wife said happily: Husband, I am pregnant, the doctor said it has been more than a month. I jumped up with instant joy, hung up the phone and went to my boss for leave. Excitedly said: Boss, can you give me 5 days off? I haven't been home for half a year, my wife is pregnant, the doctor said it's been more than a month, I can't work now, I want to go back to see. The boss was silent for a while and asked: You haven't been home for half a year? Me: Yeah! The boss asked again: Your wife has been pregnant for more than a month? Me: That's right! The boss nodded and said: Let you go for half a month, go back and find out who the child's father is!

8. Once upon a time, there was a stupid son, who married a good daughter-in-law, and entered the cave room after visiting the church. Dumb Er felt strange, so he asked his daughter-in-law, "Hey hey, what name did I call you?" The daughter-in-law was angry and funny, so she replied to him: "Shout to Prince Yan." On the wedding night, the husband and wife slept one head each, and the wife used her feet to hook her husband, and after the idiot was woken up, she didn't know what to do, so she called out to his father: "Father, you see, Yama Wang ye is hooking me." When his father heard this, he was shocked, and he loudly told Yama Wangye: "Yama Wangye, Yama Wangye, my son is still young, I am already old, if you want to hook me, you can hook me." ”"

9. On the third day after my cousin got married, I couldn't stand it and pretended to work overtime. In fact, he ran to play cards and came home at two or three o'clock in the night, but he did not expect that his cousin was still waiting for him to eat. The cousin was very guilty, there was such a gentle wife in the family, and he also lied to others. My cousin said: I called your unit from 6 o'clock after work, and now, every hour I will sprinkle paprika and salt into the dish. It's all 8 floors up to now, so you can explain it to me after eating.

10. During the summer vacation, my boyfriend and I went on a trip abroad. He studied photography and had a great set of photographs, so along the way I asked him to take pictures of himself. On the way back, he gave me a look through the photos I had taken. He said to me: a good look of ten dollars. I said: That's not good to delete. He replied: "Don't look good to give me a hundred deletes!?

11. When I got to the office, my brother-in-law and the female supervisor were talking, and Alipay's voice suddenly prompted: "Alipay has arrived at 700,000 yuan!" The female supervisor looked at her brother-in-law and said, "Well, you are quite rich, so rich to go to what class, so let's invite you to dinner at night." "At night, the brother-in-law was with the female supervisor. The next day, the female supervisor said that there was an emergency and hoped that her brother-in-law could lend her 700,000 yuan. After a while, the brother-in-law's mobile phone rang again: "Alipay has arrived at 700,000 yuan!" The brother-in-law quickly explained: "This is the SMS ringtone I set!" "Huh? The female supervisor passed out, and the brother-in-law said: "Should I tell her that I really have 700,000 yuan!" ”?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #