1, I remember once I took a plane to the toilet, so I went to the toilet to open the door, at that time it scared me, there was a flight attendant in the toilet, may have forgotten to lock the door. She was stunned at first, and then she was anxious

1, I remember once I took a plane to the toilet, so I went to the toilet to open the door, at that time it scared me, there was a flight attendant in the toilet, may have forgotten to lock the door. She was first stunned, and then stomped her feet urgently: "Who are you, what are you doing, you close the door quickly" I blushed at that time, hurriedly said sorry, closed the door, leaned on the door and gasped for breath, thinking that it was really embarrassing, who knew that at this time there was a flight attendant's cry: "I let you go out and close the door!" ”?

2. When I got married, my relatives and my wife's relatives entertained together, and a total of 260,000 copies of sub-money were received. My mother-in-law and my mother-in-law discussed one and a half of them, and my wife and I were not happy. In the end, everyone unanimously decided to buy color drifting, and I laughed dumbly after listening to it: "If you plant 10 million, how should you spend it?" The mother-in-law replied without thinking: "If it is 10 million in the real, you two don't have to make it up, each person 5 million to find a better one!" ”

3. After going to college, I was liberated to play games in the dormitory all day, and I despised a roommate in the dormitory who soaked in the library all day. But unexpectedly, the roommate who likes to go to the library the most these days suddenly stopped going. Curious to ask the reason, the roommate said seriously, "That's the Shamisen Bookstore, I don't go!" Me: "What Sanwei Bookstore?" Roommate: "The smell of perfume for girls, the smell of stinky feet for boys, and the smell of dog food for Xiu'en love." ”

4. Today I drove bugatti to the side of the road to smoke. At this time, an uncle wearing a slippers vest stopped next to him and rested on the side of the road. He said to me, "Boy, your car is good, you have hundreds of thousands, right?" Me: "Uncle, you want to be beautiful, this car is 2 million!" The uncle was surprised and extinguished his cigarette butt and said, "I'm going, it's so expensive, it's almost catching up with the rent I collect for a month." "Uncle walked away in a dashing manner, leaving me stunned.?

5. The mother-in-law was carefully selected and finally found a good object for the sister-in-law. Mother-in-law: "He has 5 million savings, and he promises to love you for 10,000 years!" "So the sister-in-law and the man got married!" After marriage, the man said: "The annual living expenses of the two of us are 500 yuan!" The sister-in-law almost went crazy at that time: "What? You said you had 5 million savings, and you said you wanted to love me for ten thousand years! Man: "Yes, 5 million deposits, divided into 10,000 annual flowers, isn't it 500 yuan per year?" ”

6. After work, the female colleague wanted to rub the car and asked me to send her home. To take her to the door, I had intended to leave, but she repeatedly invited me in for tea. When I entered the door, I was stunned, the female colleague's house was really too messy, I had a slight cleaning habit, so I did not plan to go, helped her clean up the house, busy for several hours, the sky was full of stars, which made the house clean. As soon as I looked at my phone, it was already eleven o'clock in the evening, and I offered to say goodbye. The female colleague stopped me and asked angrily, "Brother, after cleaning the housework, you will leave?" So why have you been busy for so long? "I said to keep your house clean and tidy." The female colleague asked, "And then?" "I said I was tired from work and wanted to go home and rest. The female colleague became more and more angry: "What? I can't rest you in such a big house? I suddenly had a stroke of genius and asked, "Do you rent this house?" Rent me one, I take care of cleaning the house and cooking. Then you count me cheaper! The female colleague readily agreed. After moving in, I diligently did housework and cooked every day, but the female colleague was quite critical and talked to me, she said: "Brother, I thought you were enlightened, I didn't expect you.... I ask you again, you have done so much, what is it for?" "The market price of her house is 1600, now count me 500, you say I am for what, less than 1100 rent."

7. Before the aunt married the second uncle, the two families used to sit together and talk about the conditions. She said shyly, "Don't want anything, just have a mouthful of food to eat!" The second uncle was very happy at that time, thinking that his fate was good, he picked up a daughter-in-law, and as soon as he patted his thigh, it became a matter. Later, in the third month of marriage, the second uncle returned from the flour mill for the sixth time, and he began to suspect that the original decision was not too hasty...

8. Yesterday, Uncle Zhang, who lives next door to my house, received a pension. Uncle Zhang took his little grandson to the street, and he said, "Grandson, what do you want to buy today?" Say it! Grandpa bought it for you! Little grandson: "I want a windmill!" Uncle Zhang: "Your requirements are also too low, say, what kind of windmill do you want?" Grandpa will buy it for you! The little grandson raised his finger and pointed to the wind turbine on the opposite mountain: "That's it!" ”

9. This afternoon, Iron Pillar came to a gas station and wandered around for several hours. Later, the staff at the gas station couldn't help it. Several people came to the iron pillar with sticks and said: Comrade, you have been here for half a day, is there anything wrong? Tie Zhu said a little embarrassed: I'm really sorry, this is the safest place, I am trying to quit smoking.?

10. After the father-in-law died of a cancer certificate, the mother-in-law danced square dance and met a new boyfriend who was 12 years younger than herself. He is a guesser and goes to the store every day to buy a big lot! Mother-in-law: "If you buy a lottery and float the prize, what are your plans?" Boyfriend: "If I can win 200,000, I will open a milk tea shop near your house." Mother-in-law: "What if you planted 5 million?" Boyfriend: "Then I will play all over the great rivers and mountains of the motherland until there are 200,000 left, and then open a milk tea shop near your home!" "Mother-in-law:"

11, I took a day off from work today, so I went out to shop and went to the park with my son, we played hide-and-seek in the park, my son was eight years old, my father hid my son to find, my son did not find it. After more than an hour, his son's cry alarmed passers-by, and everyone helped him find it. After two minutes, a reed pole in my mouth came out of the lotus pond.

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #