1, in the morning, my sister changed clothes in the house, I went in without knocking on the door, and my sister screamed and covered her upper body with clothes. I said: I'm afraid of what, my dad left for work, just me and my mom at home, both

1, in the morning, my sister changed clothes in the house, I went in without knocking on the door, and my sister screamed and covered her upper body with clothes. I said: What are you afraid of, our father went to work, I am at home with my mother, are all women, what are you afraid of. My sister replied: I am afraid that you have low self-esteem...

2, a girl was admitted to the public institution work, before someone wanted to introduce the object to the girl the girl did not have the heart, said that it is still young, to play for two more years. Recently the girl took a new driver's license, after the driver's license arrived, she asked everyone to help find a boyfriend, this huge contrast before and after made me confused, and I couldn't help but ask her why she was not in a hurry to find it before and is now in a hurry? The girl replied: My home is too close to the unit, I can't drive a car, I want to marry farther... Me: A woman's heart is a needle in the ocean, I really can't figure it out!

3. My sister-in-law is a strong woman who works as a department manager in a famous enterprise and is usually very busy. Today the company came to a new project, the sister-in-law did not have time to pick up the little nephew, please give it to me. I drove to the kindergarten and heard a couple of kids chatting. A younger friend said: "I found my parents particularly interesting, they said that I picked up the monster. The second child: "What's so strange about this, many parents say so!" At this time, the nephew said quietly: "My father and mother said that I was sent after shopping for 200." ”

4. My husband often goes to a friend's house to play mahjong at night. I said angrily, "You don't have any hobbies other than playing mahjong. The husband was also angry: "What do you mean?" You go find a few people, and I'll give you a good talk! "So I called three of my ex-boyfriends. When my husband looked, his face was green, and he would never play mahjong again!

5. After breaking up with my girlfriend, I healed myself alone in the café. Just when I was sad, a beautiful woman came up to me and asked: Handsome man, do you mind taking a picture? I was so excited, I didn't expect happiness to come so suddenly, I smiled gentlemanly: Of course I don't mind! Then Beauty picked up my coffee cup, took a few selfies, turned around and left.?

6. I am 26 years old this year, but I still have no partner, so today I went on a blind date. But the man didn't look at me, and I was very confused, so I asked him why he didn't look at me. He replied without hesitation: "Short." Once the brother saw such an honest person, he said to him, "You are so straight, are you not afraid of being beaten?" He quickly changed his mouth: "It's not short, it's fat." His face instantly turned red after saying that, and yes, I smoked.

7. When playing Peace Elite, I met a girl who opened up, and I thought she was very bold, so I asked her to come out to meet. I asked my mother for four hundred dollars, and my mother asked me what I was doing, and I said dating. She happily gave it, and just after leaving the house, she met her father. He pulled me aside and said, "Boy, four hundred dollars and half of each of us, half a month I don't know the taste of smoke." I said, "Dad, this is money for my dates and can't give it to you." Dad smiled and said, "You're still too young, the one who accompanies you to play Peace Elite is me, I bought a 10 yuan plug-in for smoking!" ”

8. A high-quality student who graduated from a famous female manager university, with a height of 168 and a very beautiful appearance, but she has no boyfriend. Yesterday I asked the female manager, "Why don't you find someone who is so beautiful?" The female manager said: "----Straight no favorite." I asked, "What do you like?" I'll look at you looking for something. The female manager said: "I like Chinese culture. "Left behind—I'm messy in the wind...?"

9. When two people are dating each other in a hotel, the girl asks the young man: "How much do you save?" Young man: "Not much, only 3 million." Sister: "That's not much, it's already a lot, what do you do?" Boy: "The brick factory." Sister: "Your savings will not be 3 million bricks." Boy: "Or else!" ”

10. Because of the blocked fallopian tubes, I have not had a child for 5 years. A few days ago, my husband's mesh bag was 500,000 yuan for me to go for surgery, and not long after the operation, I became pregnant. Now that my child is eight and a half months old, I am very bulky and very inconvenient to move. My husband, who has never done housework, can only cook for me to eat. This morning, my husband went to the vegetable market to buy vegetables, and in front of a stall, my husband asked: Boss, is this melon sweet? The boss looked at him, didn't speak, and continued to greet the others. The husband thought that the boss did not hear, the voice was louder, and asked: Is this melon sweet? The boss was instantly furious, glaring at him and shouting: You are here to find stubble, right? You say bitter melon is sweet or not?

11. When I was in high school, in my girlfriend's rental house, I suddenly heard a knock at the door. The girlfriend stood up in shock and said: No, my dad is coming! I said with a hippie smile: There is me, there is no uneven thing, it is okay for you to open the door! After opening the door, a middle-aged man, I immediately walked up and said politely: Uncle, you have come just in time, pay your daughter's rent this month. The girlfriend was next to him, and he kept smirking, and the middle-aged man also laughed and said: Boy, yes, the lying face is not red or white! I thought to myself, could I have been punctured, and turned my head to look at my girlfriend. The girlfriend laughed and said: He is the landlord!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #