The daughter-in-law went to the vegetable market to buy a live fish, took a knife, hesitated for half a day and was reluctant to kill. So, he asked me: "What if the fish are so cute that they are reluctant to kill?" I said, "Or we won't eat it."

The daughter-in-law went to the vegetable market to buy a live fish, took a knife, hesitated for half a day and was reluctant to kill. So, he asked me: "What if the fish are so cute that they are reluctant to kill?" I said, "Or we won't eat it, let's keep it." The daughter-in-law thought for a moment: "Why don't we kill it, just throw it into the pot and stew it, the fish in the province will suffer!" ”

2, just joined the work, when I went to work, I was hit by a big mother and lay in the hospital for three months. The big mother is very good, often come to visit, busy before and after, her daughter also came several times, each time a big bag to buy nutrition and fruit. After being discharged from the hospital, she made two appointments with her daughter, and each time she rushed to pay, feeling that the girl was very good, and thus established a relationship. After marriage, I found that my daughter-in-law had obsessive-compulsive disorder, and it was uncomfortable to have no money on her body, and it was even more uncomfortable to have money not to spend...

3, husband: why do you like to have dogs before marriage? Wife: Obedient and able to watch the door, you can warm your feet in winter, and when you are not happy, you can kick it with two feet to relieve gas. Husband: So why don't you raise it now? Wife: With you, I don't need it.

4, chatting with his buddies, he suddenly said a sentence emotionally, "I raise you?" "Inexplicably moved, just wanted to explain at length that I have a boyfriend, we..... He sent another sentence: "When I raised those pigs, if you can eat half of them, I will not lose so badly..."

5, Mother's Day, everyone has sent flowers and gifts. shallow! Only companionship and sincere confession are the best gifts for mothers. I walked up to my mother and said affectionately: Mom, thank you for more than thirty years of nurturing grace. Mom: Get up, block the TV!

6, the mother-in-law bought a lottery ticket a few days ago and won the first prize, the prize is a 72-inch large color TV, the result was just installed for a few days on the broken, so I invited the downstairs Xiao Wang to repair. Xiao Wang especially liked the mother-in-law's mother-in-law's erha, after repairing the TV, she let the family help her repair the air conditioner. After repairing the air conditioner, the mother-in-law also wanted to ask people to help repair other electrical appliances, Xiao Wang pointed to the erha at home and said: "Auntie, my cooking skills are particularly good, or I will get you a dry pot of dog meat to taste!" ”

7, the mother-in-law a few days ago bought a color drift won the first prize, the prize is a 72-inch large color TV, the result just installed a few days on the broken. So I invited Xiao Wang downstairs to repair it, and Xiao Wang especially liked the Erha raised by his mother-in-law. After fixing the TV, she asked the family to help her fix the air conditioner. After repairing the air conditioner, the mother-in-law also wanted to ask for help to repair other electrical appliances. Xiao Wang pointed to Erha at home and said, "Auntie, I have a very good cooking skill, or I will get you a dry pot of dog meat to taste!" ”

8, the sister-in-law is poor and loves the rich, in order to live in the seaview villa, she abandoned her brother and little niece and married an 85-year-old rich man. The brother always found a partner, and raised the little niece alone. Not working on weekends, my brother took his 4-year-old niece to the park to fly kites. It was a very windy day, the kite was blown away, and my brother went home frustrated. On the way home, the little niece asked: Daddy's kite flew away, so when did it fly back? My brother looked sad: When your mother returns home, she will come back! Then, the little niece nodded firmly...

9, the little boy who led the family was dumped by his girlfriend when he was young, bought two bottles of 100 bottles of beer to buy drunk in the field. Drunk on the way home knocked down the pig, the pig egg broke one, lost 500 pigs. About a week later, my cousin was knocked down by a pig on a motorcycle, and it looked like the pig. This time the cousin fractured, and the pig raised lost more than 5,000 to the cousin. The next day, the pig keeper brought a few pounds of pork to his cousin, and his mouth was still nagging: This time you can rest assured to ride a bicycle, the pig was slaughtered by me that night.

10) I recently found a perfect marriage age gap. A 20-year-old beauty marries a 50-year-old rich man, and when the beauty is 50, the rich man returns to the west, and the beautiful woman becomes a rich woman. Then the 50-year-old rich woman raises a 20-year-old handsome man, and after 30 years, the rich woman returns to the West and the handsome man becomes a rich man. Then the 50-year-old rich handsome man marries a 20-year-old beauty...

1 Liu Tao stood with Qin Hailu, and it was completely impossible to see that he was a person in his forties! Although both wear a long black skirt with embroidery, the image is different, the former is fairy, the latter is retro. Both are well maintained, and the goddess is full of style.

12, driving the second uncle Cadillac out of the door, accidentally bumped into a girl at the traffic light. I hurried out of the car and saw that the girl was very pretty and was my type. I said, "Rest assured, I'll raise you for the rest of your life." She looked up at my face, got up from the ground and said, "I'm all right, you hurry up." "Looking at her limping figure away, I sighed that there are still many good people...

13, in the car to listen to the villagers swing the dragon gate array, they talked about the topic of children. Uncle asked the widow sitting next door: "Do you like to raise a baby, or do you like to have a baby..." The widow smiled and replied: "I like to raise a baby, I prefer to have a baby...". They all laughed, leaving me with a confused face...

14 After getting married, the groom said to the bride, "Honey, I'm sorry, there is one thing I have been hiding from you, and we will have to send a child support every month in the future, because I still have a child to raise." The bride said, "Nothing, my dear. There's also something I haven't told you that we're going to have to pay a monthly child support because I also have a child to raise. ”