The right point of view cannot guarantee how good a thing or a relationship is, but it can determine the lower limit of bad. The most afraid of forming a deformed love relationship, or husband and wife relationship, so the lover is instinctive, understand the love will love is the ability, do not forget their own at the same time can also love each other.
Really, the correct view of love and marriage is extremely important in feelings, including the operation of marriage can also play an unexpected benefit.
To some extent, the correct concept of marriage often directly determines the direction of marriage, so as to avoid marriage being trapped by the sense of interest.
Perhaps there will always be contradictions between people, but contradictions are not the same as contradictions, some contradictions are only differences in positions, and some contradictions are conflicts on the core cornerstone. The former quarrels at the head of the bed and the end of the bed, and the latter can only lead to the gradual separation between husband and wife, and each other is becoming more and more strange.
So what is the correct view of marriage? Here are five points, see if you have it?
1. First have a correct understanding and attitude towards marriage.
Can't always compare marriage with love, marriage is bland, it will be compared to radiant love, and marriage is also the most realistic life in the world, so marriage is a life event, which also means that we have chosen another way of life.
The content of love is sweet, all the participation of the romantic part of life, and the content of marriage is life, all the participation of the realistic part of life.
What is the content of life? Chai rice oil and salt, old-age care, family affairs, personal contacts and so on. Whoever lives a married life in the way of love, there is no failure, love can only be an occasional snack, passion and romance are not its normal, ordinary and suffering are.
If you don't have the right understanding and attitude toward marriage, you can't have a correct view of marriage.
2. Marriage is a partnership between two people.
Even if you don't love your partner, you can't throw away your career, otherwise the beneficiary is you, and it is you who suffers the loss of benefits. Therefore, we must work hard to operate together, and we must bear any crises, difficulties, and losses together, and understand that you are a community of interests.
Romain Rolland said: "In marriage, everyone has to give and at the same time take back something: this is the law of supply and demand. ”
What you want to get, you have to pay first, so marriage is also a relationship of interests, to balance each other's interests, you pay, but also to take back something, but also to take into account their partner, he paid, but also have to take back something.
You can't always think about your own interests and ignore your partner's interests, otherwise he will have no motivation and motivation.
3. Marriage is a small family formed by two people.
It is two people who have separated from their respective original families and re-formed a small family belonging to two people, and from then on, the interests of the small family must be put first. If both parents always cross the line of your life, you must immediately stand up and refuse, but also ensure your independence.
Children, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have never been the key relationship in marriage and family, if the mother-in-law wants to make trouble, you can't live, you must be divided, this is the principle.
Only the relationship between husband and wife is the key relationship in marriage and family, and what happens should be discussed with your partner.
Parents and siblings are your closest people, and your spouse is your closest person, and this should be clear. The operation of their own small family is not good, and it is inevitable that it will be a burden for parents.
4. Husband and wife can only seek common ground while reserving differences.
Everyone is a unique individual, and it's impossible for you to expect two people to be absolutely fit and perfectly fit, and you'll never find such a person. You have your ideas, I have my opinions; you have your emotions, I have my personality, and everyone's perception is different.
Inappropriate, not terrible, terrible is not respect and acceptance, always with a strong desire to control to try to change each other, this is a violation.
When in love, both people wear masks, and the shortcomings after marriage are exposed, so later, it is also necessary for two people to appreciate each other, to enlarge each other's advantages, the eyes can not always stare at each other's shortcomings, and finally do not have any harsh requirements.
The American writer Peterson said:
"The art of marriage is not to expect the husband to be a god with an aura and a wife to be an angel in flight. Don't ask the other person to be perfect, but cultivate willfulness, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor. ”
5. Have the value of common struggle.
Between husband and wife, there should be the obsession that must be joined hands with the white sideburns, and the determination to bear a common destiny, but all this is based on the values of common struggle. Without the values of common struggle, it is impossible to share hardships and hardships, and we will be in the same boat through thick and thin.
Getting married, not just finding someone at random, directly smashing yourself on each other's body, from now on you have to be responsible for my life, for my dreams, for my desires.
What kind of life you want, you can only create through your own efforts, two people warm each other, encourage each other, and run to a better life together.
The lack of values of common struggle basically proves that marriage has been trapped by the sense of interest, and even if it is not yet married, it has already thought of the guarantee of divorce in case it cannot go on.
I hope that we can all treat marriage with the right attitude, run marriage, maybe there will always be quarrels, but the concept of marriage will become an anchor in life, no matter what kind of wind and rain you encounter, always ensure that your marriage will not deviate from the right course, which will win half.
Looking at the marriage of modern people, many of them have an attitude of indifference, or they obey the arrangements of their families and blindly enter into marriage.
I don't know what my marriage means, my choices are confused, my life is confused, and when I suddenly wake up one day, I start to question my choices.
The essence of marriage will not change, before marriage, you always have to determine your own needs for marriage, and then strengthen your own will, so as not to be biased by other people's views, adhere to your own path.
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