Can you believe it? Only people with "great wisdom" can manage the intimate relationship of "strong women and weak men".
In the past we have heard the following voices:
Men are the pillars of the family, men must work hard to work hard, to take care of their families, wives and children.
But now?
The voice has changed, and the difference in status between men and women is no longer so obvious.
Women can also stand up to half the sky, and even more and more women are choosing to become strong women in the workplace.
They are financially independent, spiritually independent, and can live particularly well even without love.
Most importantly: they think from the bottom of their hearts that they are no worse than men.
As a result, the roles of men and women in intimate relationships seem to have shifted.
From the state of strong men and weak women to the state of "strong women and weak men".
But in fact, in the state of strong women and weak men, feelings are often difficult to last.
Because of strong girls, they are fully capable of running their own lives, but they may not be able to manage a relationship and a family.
In this article, you will see:
Why are girls more aggressive?
Why is it difficult for women to have strong and weak feelings for men to last?
How to change the feelings of strong women and weak men?
-01
How are girls getting more and more "strong"?
Not every girl is born with a strong personality.
The reasons that affect the strength of girls are related to the family and also related to the growth experience.
First: The mother in the original family has a strong personality
The environment of the original family has a profound and lasting impact on the character of the children.
In the family, the stronger the mother's personality, the stronger the girl's personality growing up in this family.
Boys who grow up in this environment have a weak personality.
The personality of girls is more partial to their mothers, and they are influenced a lot by their mothers.
If the mother is weak, the daughter is weak; if the mother is strong, the daughter is strong.
Conversely, the boy's personality is the same.
Because strong mothers will have a particularly strict way of educating boys.
There is a saying that goes like this:
If a boy finds a partner to marry, if he wants to judge whether a girl is suitable, it is enough to see what kind of person the girl's mother is.
Second: A person who has lived for a long time has developed an independent personality
There is also a category of girls who have a strong personality because they have been alone for too long.
He left his parents very early, lived on campus when he was studying, and was far away from home when he went to college.
After graduation, he stayed in the field to work and rarely returned home.
Over time, she did many things by herself, made her own decisions, worked by herself, and lived by herself.
He has developed an independent personality and truly achieved economic independence, life independence, and spiritual independence.
As a result, the girl's concept of marriage and love has also changed:
She is no longer attached to the boy, even if she is alone, she has the ability to live a good life, or even a better life.
To start a relationship, she does not have to look at the boy's face and has more say.
And this is a true portrayal of contemporary women.
You will find that the more economically independent the girl, the more she has the right to speak in the relationship.
On the contrary, those full-time wives, who have no income, no work and life, live a relatively humble life.
-02
Why is the feeling of "strong women and weak men" difficult to last?
First: Men are born with strong self-esteem
A male reader consulted me about his marital experience:
His relationship with his wife is typical of strong women and weak men.
His income is not as high as his wife's, but he is basically responsible for the big and small affairs of the family, inside and out.
In addition to working to earn money, housework, cooking, taking care of children, the elderly on both sides, relatives and friends basically rarely participate in the movement.
But even so, his wife still had a lot of dissatisfaction with him.
A sentence that often hangs on the lips is: "You are really useless as a man, others are men who can make money, what is the use of you?" ”
But in fact, this wife did not recognize the reality.
If she doesn't have a husband to take care of the family, run the family, and run the family well, how can she have enough energy to work hard for her career?
If there is no man to take good care of the children, can her career get better and better?
A person's success is inseparable from opportunity, luck and the current state of life.
If you look down on the other party because you have succeeded, that is really "impure motives".
A woman's sentence "You are really useless" directly negates men's efforts and hits men's self-esteem.
Over time, which man is willing to live with you?
Second: only consider the problem from your own point of view, but do not consider the other party
In the feelings of strong women and weak men, women tend to "over-amplify" their achievements and enlarge their own efforts for the family.
So this is easy to happen:
Amplify your own efforts and ignore your partner's efforts;
Only care about their own feelings and moods, and vent directly when they are unhappy; but they will not feel their partners' emotions and cannot empathize.
This is the psychology that a person will inevitably appear after a long time "smooth sailing".
Look down on each other, look down on the people around you.
For a long time, of course, it is difficult for feelings to go on.
-03
How to manage the feelings of strong women and weak men?
First: smart women should learn to "show weakness"
The meaning of showing weakness is to give the opportunity to perform to men at the right time.
Rather than saying that showing weakness is acknowledging.
What is weakness?
For example:
The woman was tired after a hard day and came home from work to see her husband sitting on the couch resting.
At this time, women should not rush to lose their temper and try to do this:
"I'm tired from work for a day, can you give me a massage?"
Lowering your posture and expressing your own fatigue, men generally will not refuse this request from you.
Don't put your own efforts for this family in your mouth, a truly hearted, responsible man will not ignore everything you have paid for this family.
There is a saying: "A woman who is spoiled is the best life."
Why?
Because in a man's bones, he longs to be praised and recognized, so as to satisfy his sense of accomplishment.
Therefore, no matter how strong a woman's career is and how high her income is, don't talk about this kind of thing.
You can be very strong and capable on the outside, but back home and turning yourself into a "little woman posture" is more conducive to maintaining your feelings.
Second: Don't neglect each other's efforts for your feelings and family
No matter how much you pay for this family, how much you pay for your feelings, don't easily deny your partner's efforts.
Because the more you deny, the more it will hit the other person's self-esteem; the more you deny, the easier it is to cause contradictions with each other.
What is a family?
The family is two people operating together, providing each other with a "safe haven" and becoming the most solid backing in each other's hearts.
A good marriage is not about who makes more money, nor is it measured by how much money you make.
but:
When you are in a trough, whether the other party becomes your best reliance.
Only when people are in trouble can they see the truth.
Girls who make more money, should they be strong?
Do men who take care of their families and children have to be vulnerable?
Family, that's not how it's calculated.
If you want to run a good marriage, you can't do without each other's support and respect.
Today's Topic:
How do you view the feelings of "strong women and weak men"?
(Article with picture source network)