When it comes to the topic of old-age care, it has been the top priority since ancient times, after all, no matter how developed human science and technology is, how superb the medical level is, life, old age, illness and death are still the fate that we cannot escape.
Since people inevitably die, they naturally hope to go through a smooth life and suffer less sin, so instead of having unrealistic dreams like immortality, it is better to arrange their old age well.
Since ancient times, the most common way to provide for the elderly is to raise children to prevent aging, and this "child" refers not to all children, but to sons, after all, in the past thinking, the preference for sons and daughters, thinking that daughters are outsiders, can not bear the responsibility of providing for their parents.
Raising children and preventing old age is also the most reasonable excuse for many parents to prefer sons to daughters.
For example, I am an only child, the pearl in the palm of my parents, and my parents are open-minded and never thought of having another son. However, from childhood to adulthood, I have heard relatives persuade my parents more than once to ask for another one, otherwise there will be no one to rely on when I am old, and more than once I have heard someone joke with me that I want to have younger brothers and sisters.
Hearing these words, I felt very angry in my heart, and I didn't understand why girls can't give their parents a pension. As long as my parents treat me well, when I grow up and have the ability, I will definitely honor my parents, although I can't guarantee that I can let them live a rich and noble life, but I will also do my best to let them live in their old age.
There is a saying in the "Yan Family Training": those who are weathered by husbands are also those who walk from the top to the bottom, and those who are first and give to the latter. If the father is not kind, the son is not filial, the brother is not friendly, the brother is not respectful, and if the husband is unrighteous, the woman is not smooth.
Whether the children will fulfill the responsibility of providing for their parents is not directly related to whether they are men or women, and it is directly related to the parents' education methods and whether the parents have fulfilled their obligations.
The younger brother gave birth to two sons, and he had only one daughter, which became the reason why his parents forced him to help his younger brother. Fortunately, compared with his parents who preferred sons to daughters, He Xin was not confused to the extreme.
01.
He Xin is 32 years old this year, and the phoenix man is a big label on him.
"My parents made a living as farmers, earned very little, and had two sons to raise. Whether it is my parents, or my grandparents, they all put their hopes on our brothers, urging us to study hard, we must get into a good university, with academic qualifications, in order to find a good job, make money, as long as one of us has a job, the whole family can live a good life, that is, people often say that one person gets the ascension of the chicken dog. ”
Compared with his younger brother, who was uncertain in heart, playful and active, and could not stand the pain of reading, He Xin was more sensible and more hardworking, and in the end, He Xin lived up to his family's expectations, was admitted to a double first-class university, and became a celebrity in his hometown.
After He Xin graduated, he stayed in the internship unit to work, got the company's weight, promotion and salary increase, and the current annual salary is about 400,000.
3 years ago, He Xin met his wife Du Juan through blind dates, and the two of them bought a marriage house in the provincial city and married each other. Last year, He Xin was delighted to have a beloved daughter.
"After I earned money, I bought a house in the town of my hometown, for my parents to provide for the elderly, since I graduated, my parents have not farmed much, I will give them a monthly alimony, from the home appliances, small to the family's mobile phone bill, are the money I gave, as a son, I did my filial piety." 」
02.
However, He Xin's parents were not satisfied, only because they hoped that He Xin would not only be a filial son, but also an elder brother who could be an elder brother like a father, and could make his brother have no worries about food and clothing for a lifetime.
In this regard, He Xin is really difficult to accept, in his view, brothers and sisters should help each other, but there is no reason for the brother to take his hard-earned money to raise his brother for a lifetime, and the younger brother to sit on the mountain and eat the sky.
Moreover, the reason why He Xin did not marry his wife until he was 29 years old was because he was a phoenix man, although the conditions were excellent, but the original family was his biggest shortcoming, and many girls thought that he was too burdened, both to support his parents and help his brother, overwhelmed, and avoided him.
When Du Juan married He Xin, she clearly informed He Xin's bottom line: "Filial piety to parents is the right thing to do, but your brother is already an adult, married earlier than you, and has become a father, there is no reason to keep nibbling on you." If you dare to help your original family behind my back and find out by me, we will both be finished. ”
After He Xin got married, her parents asked He Xin to send money to his brother every month to help his brother raise two sons, and after Du Juan knew, she told her in-laws that He Xin's salary was handed over to her, how to spend her had the final say, she would give her in-laws 2,000 alimony every month, and the in-laws were sick and hospitalized.
In accordance with his wife's explanation, He Xin "poured bitter water" with his parents, telling his parents that his salary was deducted by his wife, he only had a little living expenses on his body, he was powerless, and he repeatedly refused the unreasonable requests of his parents. However, the parents refused to give up.
03.
"What? AA？ Mom, you're not kidding! I'm married to her, AA what? ”
"How am I kidding? My method is very good! You and her AA, each in charge of their own salary card, living expenses are evenly shared, the rest of the money is in your hands, when the time comes, you give your brother to spend, your daughter-in-law is not qualified to speak ah! ”
It turned out that He Xin's mother found He Xin's family and made a request to He Xin, asking He Xin and Du Juan to implement the postmarital AA system. In her opinion, the eldest son's monthly salary is more than 30,000, in addition to half of the mortgage, living expenses, etc., at least half of it can be left, which is enough to support the younger son's family of 4.
For the sake of the younger son's family of 4, the mother let the eldest son marry AA, He Xin was angry with his parents and asked: "Who gives me a pension?" It's my daughter, and it's her I should raise, not my brother's family of 4. ”
"Do you understand raising children and preventing old age?" Your daughter-in-law does not have a second child, you have no son, and after your daughter marries out, she must honor her in-laws. When you are old, who do you rely on without your two nephews? If you don't help raise my grandchildren now, what should you do when you're old? Mom is also for your own good. ”
Listening to his parents' perverse reasoning, He Xin really didn't know how to reason with them. If the biological daughter is unreliable, can the nephew be reliable? I have a daughter myself, looking for a nephew to retire, is it reasonable? Moreover, judging from the situation of the younger brother and the younger daughter-in-law, it is strange that they can educate their children well.
"My money is only for four people to spend, you two gave birth to me, raised me, I should repay your favor of birth, so, my wife gives you 2,000 a month, in fact, there is no need for so much!" 」 My wife and daughter are the people I care about the most and can spend my money, and as for other people, it's none of my business. ”
He Xin's parents did not forgive, they wanted to sue He Xin, He Xin did not tire of it, decided to reduce the alimony to them to 1000 a month, the parents saw the situation, had to leave He Xin's family.
04.
I remember that the playwright Wanqing once said: "Whether you are related by blood or not, there is only one kind of relative in this world, that is, people who care about you and hurt you, and vice versa." ”
Obviously, He Xin's parents not only favor sons over daughters, but also favor their younger sons, and have uneven views on the two sons, and there is the idea of robbing the rich and helping the poor. When you meet such parents, no matter how much you pay, they also think that they can work more and should. Even if you lose your marriage and lose your small family, they will not feel guilty, may comfort you, can marry someone else, and continue to ask you for money for your young son.
As long as He Xin compromises, his brother can still live without worrying about life without self-support, he will not be motivated, his parents still favor him, and ask He Xin to subsidize his brother, he Xin will always have to be the cash cow of the original family.
Neither men nor women can tolerate having a brother-in-law spouse. Is it worth it to lose the people who love you in order not to love your family?
END.
Today's topic: Do you think He Xin rejects his parents? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.