Emotions are a testament to being born unique, everyone has different emotions, but everyone's story is the same, hello! Hello, I am Lele, pay attention to my words, into your heart!
01
I once heard a saying like this:
“
The effect of the comparison is generally damage
。
cause
Get used to it for most people
With what you have,
go
than others
target
All of this, in the end, makes oneself feel uncomfortable and self-pitying.
”
However, some people are better than so
"None", there are people who "have" more than ever. Some people are self-pitying from comparison, and some people want to get the satisfaction of vanity from pulling on.
Especially for most married women, there is nothing more worth bragging about and showing off than marrying a husband who will make money.
If this man still cares about the family, she is eager to carry a horn with her, and wherever she goes, she will shout this good thing of rising face to the whole world.
Men, to a certain extent, represent the face of a woman.
However, there are still some women in life, who obviously marry her husband who has the ability and will make money, but always deliberately conceals it, declaring that he has no ability and is in ruins, even his mother's family
"Cheating", afraid of being known by others about her husband's true income.
It is right that the wealth is not exposed, but is it necessary to hide the truth in the face of the intimate mother's family? If a wife goes around belittling her husband, is she not afraid of hurting her husband's self-esteem and affecting her husband's feelings?
Dawei (pseudonym) is because of his annual salary of 400,000, but
The old man was scolded by his wife at his mother's house for not being able to do it,
Depressed for a long time. until
The brother-in-law got married
Only then did he wake up and understand his wife's hard heart.
02
David and his wife were married for two years.
I remember that when my wife was still alone, I always had the habit of sending money to my home. As long as the mother's family opened her mouth, she sent as much as she wanted, and never slackened.
But then they met, and when the two reached the stage of talking about marriage, the wife suddenly stopped sending money to her mother's house. And obviously his income is OK, and his wife always cries in front of her mother's family. Sometimes the brother-in-law came to borrow three hundred and five hundred, and she was unwilling to give it.
Although Dawei felt in his heart, like other men, he felt that his wife did not take her own money to subsidize her mother's family, but was for the sake of the small family. But the wife is like this, it is inevitable that some are too impersonal.
He always joked with his wife, saying that her mother's family had raised her in vain, and after marriage, she was not willing to give up on her mother's family at all.
The wife knew that he was teasing himself, sniffing a few times, and did not bother with him.
The wife also has an older sister, who married a fortune a few years earlier. However, I heard that I have been sitting on the empty mountain, and I don't know how many family foundations are left, anyway, every time I go back to my mother's house, I am very generous and pay attention to the noodles.
The mother's family also snatched a lot of benefits from them, and when it came to using money, they asked for it, and the couple had a good face, and every time they would try their best to satisfy their feelings.
I still remember that when Dawei first went to his wife's house to visit her parents, he originally wanted to buy more gifts, bring some expensive tobacco and alcohol, and perform well in front of his future parents-in-law and strive to leave a good impression on them.
Who knows, but was stopped by his wife.
His wife also specifically told him to eat more vegetables and talk less when he got home, and to see her eyes and act. In particular, with regard to the issue of work income, it is always up to her to speak.
David this man somewhat
"Strict wife control". As long as it's not something that involves principles, what the wife says is what it is.
Apparently, since dawei's gifts were not so high-grade, the son-in-law did not satisfy his future parents-in-law. On the contrary, it is the large-scale gift of the wife and sister couple, so that the old man can not close his mouth happily. At the dinner table, he took care of the eldest son-in-law to eat vegetables, and ignored Dawei. Even his wife's brother didn't even have a minimum title for him
"Hey, hey, hey" called him.
Later, when his wife was cleaning dishes in the kitchen with her mother, he clearly heard that the old man was forcing her to break up, asking her to find a rich person who would help the family in the future.
The mother and daughter had a big fight over this, and their feelings almost turned yellow. It was still the wife's repeated insistence that they successfully entered the marriage.
Moreover, every time he accompanied his wife back to his mother's house in the past two years of marriage, his parents-in-law asked him about his work, and his wife would make him shut up. He also scolded him in front of everyone for his incompetence, saying that he still dared to show his salary of four thousand yuan a month, and it was not shameful.
David was very faceless by her. Knowing that he could be decent in front of his in-laws, his wife had to belittle him, so that he could not raise his head in front of the two old men.
Especially when he went back at the same time as his brother-in-law, the attitude of the parents-in-law to the two sons-in-law was simply one heaven and one earth.
David's heart was quite unbalanced.
He also made several awkward troubles about this matter, but his wife sincerely apologized every time, coupled with the appearance of wanting to say and stopping, Dawei felt that his wife might have something difficult to say, so he forgave her.
It was not until later that the brother-in-law was ready to get married, and the in-laws forced the two sons-in-law to pay for it, that Dawei understood his wife's intentions.
On that day, the parents-in-law gathered two sons-in-law to discuss the marriage of the brother-in-law. Saying that the woman's family asked for a car and a house to buy a bride price, their old two hollowed out the family foundation, or a big difference.
In view of the difference in economic strength between the two families, the parents-in-law let the eldest sister's family pay 150,000 yuan, and the Dawei family paid 50,000.
The eldest sister's family looked embarrassed, saying that they did not have so much money, but they were questioned by their mother-in-law:
"You two usually eat and drink, and are so willing to give up to yourself, how did you get to your brother's place so stingy?"
They reluctantly paid the money. It is said that after returning home, the two also had a big fight.
As for his wife, she said that she couldn't come up with so much money for a while and a half, and she had to go back and make it up. It took about a week before the money was handed over to my mother-in-law.
At this point, Dawei really understood his wife's intentions.
It turned out that the wife's family had always favored sons over daughters. Long before his wife married him, his parents always snatched money from their two daughters to support their younger son.
The wife is worried that if his mother's family knows that he has money, he will mess with their small family like he did to exploit the eldest sister's family, so she has been deliberately scolding him for being incompetent.
After this incident, Dawei also trusted his wife more and more, and the relationship between husband and wife became better and better.
03
Like David's wife in life
Women who "pretend to be poor" are rare, but many times, this is the great wisdom of a smart woman to run a marriage.
Through their stories, we also understand the following two truths.
One: The woman who puts the interests of the small family first is Wangfu.
It is said that a good woman is the best feng shui in a family.
In this
In the era of "brother-in-law demons" and "mother-in-law slaves" blooming everywhere, marrying back a wife who can carry everything clearly is a very fortunate thing for any man.
The wife is the man's rear.
And a woman who knows how to put the interests of the small family first is often a Wangfu fate, which can make the life of the small family more and more prosperous.
Imagine that a man works hard outside, his own life is already too much to take care of himself, and his wife is always moving like ants, giving her mother's family eight hundred today and a thousand to her mother's family tomorrow. The speed at which men make money can never keep up with their wives
The speed of "moving". Where can such a marriage be happy and harmonious?
On the contrary, even if a man does the dirtiest and most tiring work and carries the most meager income, as long as his wife has a heart with him and is clear on the issue of his mother's family and small family, he can safely hand over the home to the woman.
Men have no worries, in order to be more at ease to work hard for their careers, the life of the small family can be better and better.
Second: Looking after your own home is the foundation of happiness.
Someone said:
"People live in this world, parents will leave us, children will have their own lives, the longest time to accompany you in this life is your lover." 」
Marriage is our lifelong career.
Whether it is a man or a woman, when married, you must break away from your original family in time and take the initiative to make more plans for your own small family.
Just like David's wife.
When there was only one person before marriage, the mother's family could ask her for money as often as possible. After all, at that time, her identity was only the daughter of her parents.
But marriage is different, she is not only the daughter of her parents, but also the wife of her husband, and she will have her own children to raise in the future. Therefore, we can no longer respond to the needs of our mother's family as before. It is to save the emergency and not to save the poor, and to selectively help the mother's family.
However, in real life, there are not many sober women like Dawei's wife.
They tend to perpetuate this habit into marriage. Even if they are married, they cannot distinguish between the primary and secondary, and always use the common property of the husband and wife to fill the bottomless pit of the mother's family. Regardless of whether the economic strength of the small family allows it or not, the husband is not happy.
The result of this is often only to exacerbate the contradictions between husband and wife, so that the marriage will die sooner.
Therefore, girls must understand in marriage:
It is not that the mother's family has difficulties, but it must be based on reasonableness, reasonableness, and does not affect the feelings of husband and wife. At any time, looking after your own home is the basis of happiness.
Well, today is here, LeLe hopes that each issue of the story can bring friends a little emotional thinking, like Lele please pay attention to me, to the article like collection recommended Oh, thank you we will see you in the next issue ~
!["Bride price 300,000, to the parents-in-law pension" After listening to the woman's premarital requirements, the boyfriend resolutely proposed to break up[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)