Marriage is not only a matter for two people, but also a matter for two families. Once married, both parents become each other's parents, and should treat each other equally, rather than neglecting each other.
However, in the vast majority of families, women are generally more demanding than men. Men can not honor their in-laws, they can not give their parents-in-law a pension, but women cannot, women must be filial to their in-laws, they must give their in-laws a pension, otherwise it is a great filial piety.
Therefore, some people have laughed at themselves that if a daughter-in-law does not raise her in-laws, she is not filial piety, a son-in-law does not raise her parents-in-law is called normal, a daughter-in-law does not visit her in-laws for half a year is called ignorant, and a son-in-law does not visit her parents-in-law for half a year. Nine of the ten mothers-in-law have a loving son-in-law, and nine out of ten mothers-in-law have a strained relationship with their daughter-in-law. In the final analysis, it is because they can't compare hearts to each other.
01, the husband gives 1000 living expenses per month, so that the wife is at home full-time
For a woman, perhaps the most beautiful thing is that a man says to you, "I raise you." However, such a sentence of "I raise you" is a nightmare for Zhang Qiao.
Zhang Qiao and her husband have been married for 8 years, and they have been at home full-time for 8 years. At the beginning, Zhang Qiao, who had just married, became pregnant, and if she was not in good health, she could only resign and go home to raise a baby. Later, when the eldest son grew up, he unexpectedly came to the second daughter, and Zhang Qiao could only lie at home again, no longer looking forward to going out to work.
During the period, Zhang Qiao also asked her mother-in-law to help with the children many times, so that she could go out to work and earn money to reduce the burden on her husband. But the mother-in-law was unwilling, saying that she was not in good health, and let Zhang Qiao find a way to solve it by herself.
Her husband also advised her to stay at home, saying that he could afford to raise a family alone. However, the husband's so-called affordability is a joke for Zhang Qiao.
Because although her husband said that he could support the whole family alone, his so-called support was to only give Zhang Qiao 1,000 yuan a month, and the rest of the salary was all saved by himself. Unless there is a large expense, Zhang Qiao generally asks her husband not to pay for it.
02, soft grinding hard bubbles, living expenses from 1000 to 1500
At the beginning, Zhang Qiao had a dowry and a subsidy from his parents, and the days of being at home full-time were not sad. But in the long run, enjoying more subsidies from his parents, Zhang Qiao also felt guilty and was unwilling to accept gifts from his parents.
In this way, Zhang Qiao's hands became very tense. No matter how frugal they are, they cannot meet the various requirements of their two children. Zhang Qiao consulted with her husband and hoped that he could increase his living expenses to 3,000 per month.
But no matter how hard Zhang Qiao grinds the bubble, the husband is only willing to increase the living expenses to 500. Zhang Qiao had no choice but to acquiesce to this compromise. But with the passage of time, the mother-in-law, who had been pretentious, fell ill.
The husband went out early and returned late every day, unable to take care of the burden of taking care of the mother-in-law, and naturally was dumped by the husband. Zhang Qiao began to work hard and complain, and did not dislike her mother-in-law because she had not brought a child for a day.
But Zhang Qiao is not disgusted, does not mean that the mother-in-law appreciates it. But when Zhang Qiao sometimes did not take good care of her, or could not wait for her mother-in-law to eat, her mother-in-law lost her temper and complained to her son.
03, my wife was refused to work: you still have to wait for my parents at home
More times, Zhang Qiao naturally had a chill, and when she got to the back, her mother-in-law lost her temper and accused, she simply left the stall alone, who loves to serve who waits, anyway, she is not used to the stinky temper of her mother-in-law.
As soon as Zhang Qiao went on strike, her husband was passive and had to take leave to serve his mother for a few days. Her husband repeatedly persuaded Zhang Qiao not to be angry, and the whole family was counting on him to support her. Zhang Qiao was not happy when he heard it, as if whoever left him would not be able to live.
Zhang Qiao proposed to go out to work to earn money to support his family, and no longer live a life of upward mobility. As a result, my husband refused and said: You have to serve my parents at home, you go out to work, who will do filial piety?
Watching her husband throw the pot himself, Zhang Qiao felt speechless to the end. The in-laws and mother-in-law are not her own biological parents, and she is willing to serve her mother-in-law for two or three years, which has fulfilled her duties and duties as a daughter-in-law. Why does her husband still ask her to wait without complaint?
What's more, while the husband dragged his salary in the palm of his hand, he morally kidnapped her to serve her mother-in-law and perform filial piety for him. Even if she loves her husband again, this feeling will slowly be consumed with various trivialities.
Zhang Qiao did not compromise, and she was not willing to compromise. When she was at home full-time, she compromised once, but since then she has no self, and even spending an extra penny has been pointed out by her husband, calling her a loser.
Now her husband wants to kidnap her by serving her mother-in-law and make her sacrifice herself, which is simply a fool's dream. Even if she is divorced and she lives alone with two children, she will not bow her head again.
Today's Topic:
Do you think Zhang Ting's approach is right?
Half-summer commentary: Dissect the emotions of marriage, teach you to read the human nature of the human heart!