1. The company lost power, kicked the female boss in the black, was secretly happy, and suddenly called! The point is that the foot I kicked her hadn't been taken back and the landlady was looking at me dumbfounded, while I was

1. The company lost power, kicked the female boss in the black, was secretly happy, and suddenly called! The point is that the foot I kicked her didn't come back to the landlady looked at me stupidly, and I was embarrassed to die! What a self-inflicted sin!

2. Since ancient times, it has been said that brother-in-law plays little aunt, which is natural and righteous. On this day, the sister led her husband back to the door. The husband ate and drank at his father-in-law's house and fell asleep on the kang. In his sleep, he squeezed the pillow to the side of the bed and hung it halfway in the air. The aunt saw it and went to help him. The brother-in-law grabbed the sister-in-law's clothes, and the sister-in-law violently broke free and ran away. The little sister-in-law thought to herself: I am kind enough to give you a pillow, you are so unreasonable, you must rectify you. Therefore, the sister-in-law inscribed a poem on the wall: "If you are kind enough to go to the pillow, why do you drag my clothes?" Don't look at your sister's face, tear your face. No face! No face! The brother-in-law saw it, and wrote a poem next to the poem: "Drunk and sleepy, wake up late." I thought that the virtuous wife had arrived, but it turned out to be his aunt. misunderstand! misunderstand! After the mother-in-law came to see it, the heart said, "Hey, what's the point!" He also casually inscribed a poem on the wall: "Brother-in-law plays little aunt, there are often in the world." One didn't catch it, and running was cheap. It's dangerous! It's dangerous!

3. Betrayed my sister-in-law to the boss for a promotion! And made an appointment for the two of them to find the location of the hot pot restaurant!

The two were eating happily, and a beautiful woman came over and said: Big brother, I am pregnant!

The boss looked surprised: What?

The sister-in-law gave the boss a slap without saying a word, and then began to cry: You still came out to cheat on my feelings when you got married!

The beautiful woman said: Big brother, I am pregnant!

At this time, the people in the hot pot restaurant were all staring at the boss, and the boss was also anxious to yell: What is the matter with you being pregnant, and the child is not mine!

Beauty said: I am pregnant, can you put out the smoke?

4. After graduation, I looked for a job and went to a company to do sales. After only one month of doing it, I couldn't stand it, and today I went to the boss to settle the salary. As soon as I entered the office, the manager asked me to give him ten yuan first, although I didn't know why, but I gave it without saying a word! Then he started counting the month's salary for me! The base salary is fifteen thousand, just one month. If the pre-sale is not completed, 500 deductions, 300 deductions for performance substandards, 650 advances, and 60 penalties! And then I just walked away, without taking a cloud with me! 

5. I have worked hard in the electronics factory for 8 years, but I am still an ordinary employee and have never had a salary increase. Recently, I think the desire to raise wages has been very strong. But I was afraid that the factory director would not be happy and disagree, and then I sent a message in the circle of friends to say: Should I raise my salary? Looking at it at night, there is only one message, or the factory director: what do you think? Net think something useless.

6. I drove my newly purchased Lamborghini to the highway to experience speed and affection. The top speed is 400KM/h, which is almost like flying. On the road, I saw a truck with three words sprayed on its body: Luck Car. I thought to myself that the driver was saying that the car was very lucky, and there was never a car accident. Today I learned that it was a car transporting liquefied gas!

7. After graduating from college, I went to work in other places and never came home, but I finally went home during the Mid-Autumn Festival. When I got home, I saw my parents cooking in the kitchen, and my father was cutting all kinds of peppers in the kitchen. Mom asked, "What kind of chili do you say I belong to?" Dad: That must be a bell pepper, sweet to my heart! I leaned forward and asked, Dad, what kind of chili pepper am I? Dad: You're mustard, hot eye!

8. Today my son came home very happy and said to me: "Mom today the teacher taught us to write one, two, three, I wrote wrong at the same table, the teacher beat him to cry!" I thought haha who's this stupid son! If I had this stupid son I would have died. I used to watch TV experts say to use the "encouragement education model" for children, so I wanted to praise him: "Baby! What about you?"" Mom, I didn't cry, I'm old and strong!"

#Funny GIF# #幽默搞笑段子 #