1, a rich man from India came to China to travel, got off the plane and booked a ticket back to India on the way to the hotel, and quietly left China without playing. After returning to India, the rich father was strange

1, a rich man from India came to China to travel, got off the plane and booked a ticket back to India on the way to the hotel, and quietly left China without playing. After returning to India, the rich father asked his son strangely: "How did you come back when you first arrived in China?!" The son said with some trepidation: "It's not good, China is going to attack the mainland, the streets and alleys are posted with slogans, writing "print", "laser printing", "fast printing", door-to-door printing, 3D printing." If I hadn't run so fast, I'm afraid I wouldn't have seen you!" Father said: Thanks to the fact that you have learned a little Chinese before, thank you!

2, today Xiaoming's father answered a more esoteric question of Xiaoming, I guess now Xiaoming, ah, will not understand, may understand in the future.... Save and be stingy on holidays and take Bob out to the mall. Xiaoming asked his father, "What is the difference between thrift and stinginess?" Dad said, "When I was reluctant to buy things for myself, your mother said that I was thrifty; when your mother asked me for things I couldn't buy for her, she said that I was stingy." Bob could only understand and nodded...

3. My dad works in an electronics factory and bought an electric car with a month's salary. When I was still in elementary school, I was curious to see electric cars. So he took advantage of the fact that his parents were not paying attention and secretly rode up. As a result, the handlebars were twisted, and even people with the car hit the tree. My mom rushed out and slapped me to the ground after making sure I wasn't injured!

4. On this day, I accompanied my buddies to go on a blind date, and when we saw the girls, my jaw dropped in shock. Girls are ugly, we both see a little do not believe their own eyes, how can there be a girl can look so ugly. The girls didn't look at the buddies, and the girls said: It's just that I'm not good enough to deserve you. Friend: It's okay, although you look ugly, shorter, next to you, full of pimples, and a little darker, but I don't mind at all. Then they got married.

5. When I was a child, I exhausted my means to go to the game hall on the street to rub two games, but unfortunately I often stood by the river and had non-wet shoes. As a result, I was caught unexpectedly, and I thought I couldn't escape this beating, but my father said to me gently: First go home to take a bath and eat before going out to play. I suddenly felt that my dad was so kind and respectable, a strong nod, a cigarette rushed to the bathroom, just took off the clothes Daddy grabbed the belt and broke in: You bunny cub, take off your clothes today, I see what block you can use, you have to give you a long memory!?

6. When I went to the company today, I called a Didi. After getting on the car, I found that it was a female driver, and halfway through, the sudden change of direction of a car, the female driver did not react, and the car was going to drive to a tree on the side of the road. I said: Hit the brakes! As a result, the female driver did not listen, and even covered her face with her hands. Then the car hit a tree, and I said, "Why are you covering your face with your hands?" The female driver said: I just cut the double eyelids, I am afraid of crashing and breaking...?

7. Next to a reservoir, a little boy lost his voice and cried bitterly. It turned out that the little boy and his father were playing hide-and-seek by the reservoir, one person hiding and one person looking for it, and when it was his father's turn to hide, the little boy searched for an hour and did not find it. Later, the police accompanied the boy for another 20 minutes before finding the boy's father. Later, I learned that Dad was hiding in the lake, stretching out a reed to breathe.

8. The old man took sleeping pills because of the depression certificate and deserted himself, leaving a legacy of 600,000 yuan. The mother-in-law took the money and took her brother-in-law and remarried to a man 20 years younger than her. The stepfather was particularly fond of his brother-in-law, which led to a particular rebellion against the brother-in-law. That time, when the brother-in-law came back from school, the mother-in-law said: Bring me the test paper. The brother-in-law refused to take out the test paper for a long time, and the mother-in-law said: It doesn't matter, I have a strong psychological resistance ability! The brother-in-law said helplessly: "But my body's ability to resist blows is not strong!"

9. After my cousin graduated from high school, he worked in an electronics factory and felt that the female supervisor was very good. Delivered to her door last night, the black man was bold, and his cousin bowed his head weakly and said: Can I kiss you? She didn't speak, and her cousin tried to get a little louder: Can I kiss you? She still didn't react, well, the cousin gave up... Suddenly the female supervisor said angrily: I hate you men the most, just say and don't do it!?

10, a few people play mahjong together, and they talk about those dating sites. A buddy said with great contempt: The current girl, who dates strangers at every turn, does not love herself at all. Like what dating software, shake it!!!! My cousin listened and said, "Even, I'm annoyed by this phenomenon." The buddy listened to the doubtful question and asked: What are you annoyed about? Cousin: I've been shaking for so long that none of the people who asked me out !!!!

11. Stole the money from his daughter-in-law's safe and bought two Chinese cigarettes. The daughter-in-law was particularly angry when she found out and had a big fight with me. Finally, the daughter-in-law said breathlessly: If the old woman wants to say a word to you first, she will follow your surname. I don't want to show weakness: In the future, if I take the initiative to say a word to you, it will be Wang Ba. Last night, I worked overtime at the company, and when I came home, I found a strange man sitting with his wife and eating together. I was furious, and I went up and grabbed the man by the neckline, intending to beat him. My wife immediately stopped me, and I yelled at my wife: You get out of the way, or I will beat you together. After hearing this, my wife not only did not get angry but smiled: You are a big king, eight, finally can't help but talk to me first, right? This is my cousin, originally wanted to ask him to come and teach you a lesson, see you care so much about me. Fortunately, it was a false alarm, otherwise I would really become the eighth king...

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #