1. Go back to my hometown with my boyfriend, at the mouth of the village, my boyfriend is urinating urgently, it is convenient to go to the grove, I am waiting on the side of the road, there is a grandfather coming, the uncle asked me: "Girl, who are you looking for in our village?" Me: "Uncle, I'll go to Li Xiaodong's house!" Just then, my boyfriend came out and I said to him, "Did this uncle say anything about your village?" Boyfriend: "This grandson who does not know, my neighbor" I tugged on the boyfriend's clothes to make him speak more politely, and the uncle next to him saw the boyfriend and greeted him happily: "Second grandfather, you are back?" I, depend, the rural generations are really chaotic...
2. Five years ago I borrowed 8,000 yuan from a female colleague, and as a result, she left her job a week later, and I broke off contact with her since then, and today my WeChat suddenly received a transfer of 80,000. I took a closer look, it was given by the colleague, I did not confirm. Just when I was stunned, the voice phone call came over, and she said, "Brother, this is my money to pay you back!" "I said you're afraid you've misremembered the number, it's 8,000." Female colleague said: "Brother, before it was 8000, but after all, it has been many years, and it was really wrong for me to quit and say goodbye, so more is compensation." Then she said, "Brother, I'll invite you to dinner after work!" "Just for this 80,000, I can't refuse." I haven't seen her in five years, the female colleague looks better than before, it seems that she is doing well now, she beckoned me to sit down, and said: "Brother, first apologize to you!" She was also full of apologies for what happened, and after she punished herself with three cups, she explained it to me. It turned out that her sudden resignation was not intentional, but that the supervisor was pestering her in every way, and she really had no choice, so she left. At that time, she wanted to get away from the city, so she borrowed some money before leaving. In the past two years, she has done her own business, and her income is very good, fifty or sixty thousand a month, and she has recently just come back to develop. So the first time I returned my money, I said as long as 8,000, more than not, she said I must collect, otherwise her conscience is uneasy. At dinner, I was curious to ask her what kind of business she was doing, so that she could make money. She said: "Brother, I was about to tell you about this matter, I think you are very good to me, so I can't forget you when I get rich, I take you to make money, I hate it and give it 40,000, and then I will make money." I said, "Well, I don't have much money, I'll invest 70,000 first, and then I'll see the situation!" "I took the 80,000 she gave me and transferred another 70,000 to her. It is estimated that I took less, and after eating, she blacked me out.
3. My sister is now studying at Tsinghua University in Beijing. Then, her parents gave her 3,000 yuan a month for living expenses. Two days ago, my sister bought a set of skin care products, and 3,000 yuan was spent at once, so my sister began to calculate how to find her father and ask for money. This morning my sister laid dad a bowl of noodles and a poached egg. Dad looked at the noodles and asked: How much is this bowl of noodles worth?
4. Once upon a time, there was a son who married a good daughter-in-law and went into the cave after visiting the church. Dumb Er felt strange, so he asked his daughter-in-law, "Hey hey, what name did I call you?" The daughter-in-law was angry and funny, so she replied to him: "Shout to Prince Yan." On the wedding night, the husband and wife slept one head each, and the wife used her feet to hook her husband, and after the idiot was woken up, she didn't know what to do, so she called out to his father: "Father, you see, Yama Wang ye is hooking me." When his father heard this, he was shocked, and he loudly told Yama Wangye: "Yama Wangye, Yama Wangye, my son is still young, I am already old, if you want to hook me, you can hook me." ”
5. I just walked into my five-hundred-square-meter bedroom today and wanted to start taking a break. I didn't expect my son to come to the bedroom to negotiate with me, and my daughter-in-law watched. Talking about intense times when the son asked his mother to help him! I said beautifully: That's my daughter-in-law, she will help me! My son glanced at me, we are related by blood! The next day I went to the hospital for a paternity test!
6. The couple tested their son's future intentions and put four things in the living room. Books, banknotes, photo posters, Moutai wine, peeking behind hidden doors. My son came home from school and looked around to make sure no one was there. Clip the bill into the book, take a picture of the beauty, pick up the bottle, and enter your room without a word. The couple exclaimed: Oh no, this child must be a talent in the future!
7. My brother told me that there was a new live-fire shooting range in the city, and it felt very novel, so I went to play a few trial rounds. The instructor carefully told me about safety matters and instructions for use, and I suddenly raised my gun and burst out. As a result, his record was unbearable, and he played very poorly. I said to the coach: This result is so humiliating, I want to shoot myself. The instructor skimmed his lips and said: That's great, but I'm afraid you'll have to bring 100 bullets to use it!" #Funny Scene of the Year ##搞笑一刻 #
![The village's New Year's flavor, the fifteenth day of the first month does not need to be decorated with flower lanterns, because they have a drier way to play. Don't talk nonsense, start the whole work. Since you come to see the social fire, this trip will definitely make you worth the trip[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)