1. Last night, my husband and I went to bed after taking a shower, and when we slept in a confused way, I suddenly felt that someone had locked my neck, and it felt like a hug, and I struggled to the death, and finally woke my husband up. My husband let go of me and said that he dreamed of fighting with thieves, and I was sweating at that time, and I could still be in danger of my life this year!
2. Two days ago, my mother said that she went for a walk in the park and saw a pair of women with a good sense of picture! The girl looks like she's in her 20s, and Daddy looks like he should be in his 40s, so he peels chestnuts for girls to eat; he's been talking and laughing and playing with each other, so loving! But the mother said later: "But I don't know why they don't stop kissing mouth to mouth after them?" ”
3. Last night, because the air conditioner temperature was turned on so low, I couldn't help but sneeze in the morning. I struggled to get up and get ready to make breakfast, and my husband said, "Don't do it, I'll go downstairs and buy something ready-made." I was a little moved and ready to go back to sleep. As a result, the son said: It is not that you are not allowed to sit, but your father is afraid that you will sneeze into the pot. Bear kids are provocative, right?
4. A male colleague is not very handsome, but driving a Porsche, once stuck in a traffic jam five minutes late. After that, he kept lying on his seat, and several beautiful female colleagues comforted him. Today I was also late for work, only a minute late, and I was also educated, and then when I returned to my seat, no one came to comfort me. Just when I wanted to look up, I only heard a few female colleagues shouting: "Boss, he goes to work and sleeps..."
5. The computer I bought for two months' salary is always blue screen today. I was computer blind and had no choice but to call my brother to check it out. He watched for ten minutes, then asked me, "Did you produce this monitor from Ha Liu?" I didn't hear clearly, and casually replied, "Hmm." Then, he said, "What is produced by Harbin Pharmaceutical Sixth Factory is blue screen!" ”
6. A newlywed couple is planning to go to Shanghai for a honeymoon, and the husband calls a hotel in Shanghai to book a room. When the husband heard the customer service quote, the husband was stunned and said: Too expensive. The customer service added: This is a house that can see the night view of Shanghai at night!!! The husband replied: Well, how much do you get us a room with no night view???
7. The sister-in-law's subject is three hanging, and her boyfriend wants her sister-in-law to break up! I was very confused, asked the sister-in-law: What's going on, you can retake the test after taking a driver's license, won't break up? The sister-in-law whispered: Alas, during the road test, a car suddenly came across from me, I forgot to step on the brakes, and directly hit the public toilet on the side of the road! Me: It's normal for a novice to hit a wall and hit a tree and hit a car, so you can pay attention later. Sister-in-law: But I didn't know that my boyfriend happened to be in the bathroom at the time, and when he came out, he saw that I hit the toilet, not to say that I was going to murder my husband!???
8. After the cousin's underground relationship with the company executive was exposed, he was fired and received a breakup fee of 10 million yuan. My cousin was particularly pleased and invited me to a high-end Western restaurant for dinner. We were eating when she suddenly greeted a strong man who was passing by, and the strong man nodded and left. I weakly asked her, "Sister, you actually know this kind of person, and you have a big scar on your face." Cousin: "Oh, don't mention it, in fact, his scar is because of me, and I will always call him brother." I immediately stood in awe, full of swords and swords, blood and rain. My cousin then said, "He was my driving school instructor, and I went into the ditch when I learned to drive!" ”?
#Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph# #年度搞笑名场面 #
A wave of wonderful GIFs to !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
