The term leftover woman first appeared in 2006. A year later, this entry was included in the Chinese new words of the "Report on the Living Conditions of the Chinese" and defined as: a woman with a high education, a high income, and still not getting the ideal destination in marriage after 27 years old.
I remember that for a few years or more, the word leftover woman appeared frequently in the media, and people around me also discussed it from time to time, and colleagues and friends would intentionally or unintentionally come up with the word when they joked. That kind of unabashed malice toward women comes over you, as if it's unforgivable for women to be unmarried at an older age.
Years later, the term leftover men came to the fore and official data showed that there were far more leftover men than leftover women, and the situation of women did not reverse, and it felt more difficult. There are women everywhere on the Internet, what women only love money and do not talk about feelings, women who want bride price cannot marry, leftover men are so many because they can't afford to marry their wives...
Image credit: Penguin
This reminds me of how many years ago, when the word leftover woman was "widely disseminated", which was to force women to compromise under the pressure of public opinion?
The first Marriage Law after the founding of the People's Republic of China clearly stipulates the freedom of marriage, including the freedom to marry and the freedom to divorce, and does not stipulate that marriage must be married. Some people would say that the law is the law, reality is reality, how many people in your life have you seen who don't get married? People are fearful, when you are old enough not to get married, you must not be drowned by the spit stars of the people around you, do not marry and have no children, who cares about you, the face of the parents at home does not want it?
This is a fact, how many women who are urged to marry by the family, their parents say that they are good, and they actually know better than anyone what they are for. There are many women who can't stand it, can only find someone to marry, outrageously marry for the sake of marriage, and the requirements are reduced to as long as the other party is a fertile man (generally this requirement is raised by parents).
There is a female netizen who does not know whether she is urged too hard or hates to marry, marriage is particularly urgent, divorced in a few years, posted to advise unmarried people, marriage must be cautious, marriage really can not be done.
When I was a child, I listened to my parents talk about finding a partner when they were young, and I felt that getting married and having children was a necessary process in life for them, at least most people thought so, and that was how they were executed.
In the words of some netizens, it is the age, through the introduction of people or their own find a partner, feel that it is almost casual to get married, casually have children and then casually raise, and finally casually grow old...
You ask them why they got married and had children, and the answer was telling: What is not married? Everybody else is married, everybody else has kids, everybody else is...
Maybe until the end of their lives, they can't say why they want to get married or they understand it in their hearts, but they can't explain it in their mouths, after all, some things are just clear in their hearts, and it hurts to say it too bluntly.
As for why children are born, most of them are clear: the pension is sent to the end, and the family is passed on. Of course, some may be euphemistic: like children. (Identify with people who really like children and have children for the purpose of "investing")
What is love, do you ask them what is love, love their spouse? Most people will be embarrassed or unable to answer, and some will even feel that the person asking this question is neurotic and has nothing to do.
For them, looking for a partner, it is very happy to find a person they like, and if they really can't find one they like, they will not hate it. Well, eating enough to wear and warm is the most important, what is love, they don't know, maybe it is like it.
The idea of marrying for love has only been widely mentioned in recent decades. Most people in the old society married is the order of their parents, the words of the matchmaker, blind marriage and dumb marriage is the basic configuration, at that time, where there is any love to say ah, the night of marriage only met for the first time.
What is love, there is a text on the Internet that feels love: true love should be two people, understand each other, respect each other, not entangled, not tied, not possessive, and then accompany each other through a long journey.
If this text is what love really is, how many people in real life have love? The statement that marriage is the graveyard of love is most likely nonsense, because whether they are married or not, most people will not have love. Because you like it or have a good feeling or don't hate it, you talk about a relationship with love for the purpose of marriage and love.
Marriage is never based on love, there is the best, and it doesn't matter if it doesn't. When survival is threatened, it doesn't matter whether you love it or not, like it or not.
Some netizens asked whether it is better to get married early or late? Reply: I want to get married, early is good, late is good, Whether you want to think or not is the most important. I don't want to tie the knot, it's not good to be early, it's not good to be late.
No one has the age to marry, nor the love to marry. Age, love and marriage are not necessarily related.