Perhaps many people have such a question: since there are so many leftover men and women, why can't they choose each other? In this way, can't we solve the problem of unsaling?
It seems that this view is quite correct. But when you think about it, you can't stand up to scrutiny.
Emotional things, if it were so simple, wouldn't breed so much embarrassment.
Therefore, regarding the fact that older leftover women and older leftover men are off the list, we can't just look at it from the surface. There are still many deep-seated issues behind this that we need to think about.
Fan Xiaomeng is 32 years old this year, which is a typical older leftover woman. Among her mate selection criteria, there is one. She wouldn't choose older leftover men.
When asked why, her answer was simple. She said: "The older leftover men, more or less have some problems. And myself, I have some problems. Two problematic people together, a lot of things are difficult to run into. So why should I make it harder for myself? Simply do not choose older leftover men. “
Admittedly, this view is also very real.
Therefore, the first reason why most older leftover women do not choose older leftover men is that they are unwilling to add more trouble to themselves, thinking that older leftover men have problems, and they do not have the ability to resolve it.
In fact, from the perspective of the older leftover women themselves, choosing a single object, of course, to choose a satisfactory one.
If you have other options, you generally will not choose older leftover men.
This may be a reality in the world of feelings.
There are many people who only see the surface of things, but have not seriously considered the reasons behind this.
From this point of view, most of the older leftover women may have the same idea as Xiao Meng. They should have other options. So, don't ask yourself for that.
Unlike Xiao Meng, the key reason why some older leftover women do not choose older leftover men is that they have been hurt by older leftover men. Therefore, I am not willing to choose this type of man.
As the saying goes: "Once bitten by a snake, ten years afraid of well rope." "This is the case with the reader's little dream.
She once had a blind date with an older leftover man, and at first she still felt okay. But later I found out that the reason why this man became an older leftover man was that he was good at eating and lazy.
But when he was on a blind date, he didn't show it at that time, and his family was okay. His family has always spoiled him.
In this way, after more than two months of dating, she chose to give up.
Xiao Meng said: "This kind of man, no matter how well his family is basically, cannot bring me happiness." “
But since then, Xiao Meng has more of a skeptical mentality for older leftover men. The family arranged blind dates for her, and she would not choose this type of man.
But whenever she meets such a man, she will not go on a blind date directly.
Admittedly, if you've experienced one such hurt by her, you might understand why she did it.
In fact, there are many older leftover women who have similar experiences with Xiao Meng. This is the case with them, and they will not choose older leftover men.
Of course, this is our own right. From a certain point of view, when encountering this situation, we must also learn to let go. In this way, it will be helpful for our own emotional life.
There are some older leftover women who do not choose older leftover men, and the most fundamental reason is that they do not have to choose this type of man. That's the third reason.
How can this be understood?
In fact, this is easy to understand. Reader Ah Hui is 33 years old this year, and from an outsider's point of view, it is actually easy for her to get off the list. Because there are a lot of suitors around. She just has some disadvantages in her age. In other respects, it's all good.
She now has her own business, her own house, her own car. The material conditions are very good. And it's not bad looking, and the key is that the personality is also very good.
She is in good condition in all aspects, but why did she still not take off the list?
In fact, it was something she herself didn't want to think about feelings. She was a woman who longed for freedom. She wanted to live the life she wanted.
And if this man doesn't completely impress her, it's not the type she wants. She wouldn't look at it more.
From this point of view, she does not have to choose older leftover men.
Therefore, some women have a similar situation with Ah Hui. They are the kind of older leftover women who are of the better quality.
This type of elderly leftover woman is not worried about the matter of getting rid of the list. Because they want to get off the list, as long as they lower the requirements slightly, they can quickly achieve this goal.
From this point of view, you can understand why they don't choose older leftover men.
Older leftover women do not choose older leftover men for no more than three reasons. Let's sum it up again. The first is to think that the older leftover men have problems, and they do not have the ability to get along well with each other. The second is that he has been hurt by the older leftover men and is unwilling to be hurt again. The third is that there is no need to choose older leftover men, because there is no shortage of suitors.
In fact, each elderly leftover woman's own specific situation is different.
What kind of single object to choose is up to us. But in the long run, as long as you want to get off the list, you have to face it seriously.
And what type of man you want to choose as the object of the single is your own business. As long as you feel that your mate selection criteria are no problem. Then don't care what other people say. Just stick to your principles.
(Image source network.) ）