On the train, a man and a woman meet in Pingshui, but the problem is that they are in the same sleeper box. Of course it was awkward at first, but soon, fatigue still made them fall asleep separately, and the men slept

On the train, a man and a woman meet in Pingshui, but the problem is that they are in the same sleeper box. Of course, it was awkward at first, but soon the fatigue caused each of them to fall asleep, with the man sleeping on the top bunk and the woman sleeping on the bottom bunk.

In the middle of the night, the man woke up and woke up the woman sleeping on the bottom bunk: "I'm sorry, but I froze to death on it, can you please hand me another blanket?" ”

The woman looked at the man, her eyes flowing, and said to the man, "I have a better way to let us pretend to be husband and wife, how about it?" ”

The man was stunned, but then agreed: "Good, great, I really didn't expect it!"

He was visibly overwhelmed with excitement, "So what do we do now?" ”

The woman turned around on the bunk, facing the wall of the car box, and said, "You TM won't take it yourself!" ”??

1. Female: Are there three suites? M: No! F: Are there Mercedes-Benz and BMW? M: No! F: Do you have a 7-digit deposit? M: No! F: So what do you have? M: I......... The woman turned and left. Suddenly the man said: I manage hundreds of people. There are many lawyers, professors, entrepreneurs, and many handsome women.

The woman immediately turned back to hug the man's waist and said with adoration on her face: "Dead ghost, you didn't say it earlier, this is enough!"

So what kind of company ceo are you? M: I'm the group leader.

F: You roll me!。。。。。

2, the younger brother in the company and the boss lady too close, was dismissed by the boss. Later, in the introduction of a friend to sell insurance, my brother was the first to fool my daughter-in-law to buy insurance, crackled and said a bunch, the daughter-in-law a head two big. Suddenly, my daughter-in-law pointed to my brother and said, "Okay, you just tell me how he lost more money than you did!"

3. When in love, the daughter-in-law raised a husky in the rental house.

After getting married, my daughter-in-law did not allow me to keep pets, so I asked her: Why did you like to keep dogs before marriage?

Daughter-in-law: Because it is obedient and can guard the door, it can warm its feet in winter, and when it is not happy, it can also kick its feet to relieve its breath.

Me: Then why can't you keep it?

Daughter-in-law: With you, do you still need it?

4, the mother invited colleague Aunt Liu to come home, the first time we met, I said hello: Auntie hello! Then make tea for a treat! She praised me for being sensible and joked that she was going to introduce her daughter to me!

I was a little shy and excused myself to take a shower and slip away. But I forgot to take the towel and asked my mother for help: Mom. Soon after, there was a knock on the bathroom door, and I quickly poked my head out of it!

Standing outside the door was Aunt Liu, who smiled and handed over the towel and patted my head: Good boy, change your mouth very quickly? This mother screamed so much that I was so comfortable.

5, once again in the evening to become the last one in our factory to go, was seen by our chairman. So I was immediately promoted to supervisor, and it grew from 3,000 to 6,000 yuan a month. In order to celebrate the promotion, I planned to treat myself well, and went to the market after work to buy 100 pounds of pork belly. When I got home, I made a plate of braised pork. Because I didn't do much, I was afraid that my husband would not have enough to eat, so I allocated most of it to my husband. My husband dialed me again and said, "Honey, you still eat, it doesn't matter if I eat less." My heart was very touched, and my husband continued: Wait a minute, my brother invited me to Quanjude to eat roast duck!

6, because the boyfriend successfully promoted to the department manager, a few good brothers went to the five-star hotel to celebrate in the evening, and finally the boyfriend returned home drunk, holding the remote control as a wheat, singing and dancing. The next morning, I met uncle from the same building downstairs, and uncle asked his boyfriend, "Did you sing and kill a donkey last night?" The boyfriend stroked his hand, indicating that he could not speak. Uncle Said Somewhat Angrily, "It's useless for you to pretend to be dumb, it must be you!" ”

7, recently the company next door department came a new female colleague, I heard that it is still a university school flower, big legs, a pure and moving look, I can't hold back the heart of the commotion, thinking that this is my goddess customized version ah. I was thinking about how to talk, so I decided to go online to learn the hookup skills. The next day, I bought her breakfast every morning, every holiday, all kinds of gifts, all kinds of surprises to her, yes, were rejected by her one by one, I went to her in a huff, asked her: I gave you breakfast, give you gifts, are you not touched at all?

The goddess said: I have a boyfriend. I said: What about having a boyfriend, and there is no corner in the world that can't be turned. When the goddess heard my words, she instantly softened her heart and apologized to me, saying: I'm sorry. In the future you buy me breakfast and buy me gifts I will not refuse again. After work that day, the goddess agreed to invite her to dinner. And after the meal, I safely sent her back to her boyfriend's house. Right. From that day on, I became her qualified spare tire.

8, that year, I went on a blind date, and the blind date was a woman! The sister of the woman came out with a fruit plate, but it was beautiful and moving!

Woman: "This is my sister!" "Her sister went back to her room,

I was a little sorry: "Your sister is not married yet, right?" Why didn't she go on a blind date! ”

Woman: "She's prettier than me, and she doesn't need a blind date!" Do you want to talk to me about a relationship, even if it can't be discussed, I can recommend you to my sister near the water tower! "That time, I wasn't fooled.

9. The young man goes to visit the Zen master and asks him for advice on the way to peace of mind. The Zen master did not say a word, first went to chop firewood, then fetched water, put the firewood into the stove and lit it, boiled water in a large pot, and carefully wiped the teacups one by one. The young man suddenly realized: "You mean to be good at experiencing life from the details of life!" The Zen master put down the work in his hand and said calmly, I just went to work and am busy, don't bother me! ”

10, Fa Xiao bought a car, in order to prevent other cars from rear-ending, posted a "don't kiss me" sign behind the new car.

Unexpectedly, as soon as I got on the road, I was hit by another car! A little angry and asked the other party for 500 yuan for repairs,

The other party said: "Just wipe off a piece of paint, you want 500 pieces, too fierce, right?" ”

"Too fierce?" Fa Xiao pointed to the sign and said, "This is the 'first kiss', of course, the fee is higher!" ”