1. Video chat with my daughter-in-law in the evening and tell her I just finished getting the vaccine. Who knew that she suddenly changed her face and asked me: What about your money for vaccinations? I asked with a confused face: What money, vaccination is free

1. Video chat with my daughter-in-law in the evening and tell her I just got a vaccine. Who knew that she suddenly changed her face and asked me: What about your money for vaccinations? I asked with a confused face: What money, vaccinations are free! The daughter-in-law said with a serious face: Don't think I don't know, there are three hundred yuan for vaccination in Shanghai, send me the money quickly. At this time, my mother also came to me and said: Yes, call the money quickly, my daughter-in-law and I just went to eat hot pot. Hearing this, my heart was suddenly cold, and I said with tears: Have you forgotten that I have been going to Chengdu for more than a month, and I am no longer in Shanghai.

2. The company party, after three rounds of drinking, two female colleagues fell into the arms of the leader, I saw what this became, did not this take advantage of the leader's drunkenness to ruin the leader's reputation? How can the company promote this kind of atmosphere, when I come to them, I will drag the two of them up and loudly accuse them: You can all get drunk when you drink, and your face is lost? Two female colleagues glared at me viciously and said, "What's the matter with you?"

3. The sister-in-law used to work as a waiter in a KTV, earning almost 10,000 a day, and later married an honest person, and the two lived a dull life. But last week, the sister-in-law's husband was in a car accident and did not rescue him, and the sister-in-law was sad. At the funeral, I whispered to her: How much does the insurance pay? The sister-in-law replied: At that time, I did not approve of it, and I did not let him buy it. I asked again: Then how much property did he leave for you? The sister-in-law cried: Two hundred and thirty million. Two hundred million is: remembrance, reminiscence. Thirty million: Don't take good care of the children, don't take good care of the elderly, don't remarry. "

4. Some time ago, my girlfriend chatted with me, and she has been very haggard lately. My girlfriend asked me: Do you think I am thin, can I raise fish in my collarbone? I told her: I'm thin too, and I can see my collarbone. She asked me to show her and looked at it for a while. Then calmly said: Well, honey, your collarbone is 80% shy, play hide-and-seek with me! "

5. On the bus, I was squeezed into the arms of a boy. At first, I was not embarrassed, but after a long time, I got used to it, and I gently rested my head on his body and said, "I sat on this bus for a week, and every time I was squeezed into your arms, do you believe in fate?" The boy said calmly, "I don't believe in fate." I only know how to rent a bus for five hundred, more than a hundred extras, eighty per person. So, I just believe in money

6. My brother and sister-in-law got married after a week of knowing each other, and when they came back from their honeymoon, they made a fuss about divorcing their sister-in-law!! I asked, "This just got married, why do you want to get divorced?" What happened?? Brother: "She hid the past from me!" Me: "Huh?? Is she married for the second time? Brother: "Much more serious than that, she is actually a taekwondo black belt!" ”

7. When one of my buddies went to a bar to drink, they fell in love with a beautiful girl and were embarrassed to go straight ahead. So he had a stroke of genius and wrote a note and handed it to the girl. It reads: If you like me please smile, do not like me please backflip. The girl looked at the note, smiled, stood up and slapped the table on a backflip.

8. I am the school flower of our Shandong Sports Academy, and I am pursued by the rich second generation of the basketball department. After my father knew, he felt that the men's basketball team had no future, and he did not agree with our love affair. This was the first time I came to my house with my boyfriend, and we both walked in the door together and tuo shoes. My dad held his breath and said: Boy, just rush this smell is the same as my girlfriend, people you take away!!

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