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In the eyes of young people, marriage is the sweet fruit after love blossoms and bears fruit. They tend to think that as long as two people who love each other enter into marriage, they can live a lifetime and a couple. Live a happy life like in a fairy tale.
But in the eyes of the elders who have experienced the world, marriage is by no means as simple as two people living together for a lifetime. A mother once told her son that choosing a wife to accompany her for life cannot only look at feelings and appearance, without these three things, no matter how deep and beautiful the feelings, you cannot marry.
One: The heart of sharing weal and woe
There is a saying that there will be such a sentence when taking the marriage oath, are you willing to be his wife? Neither disease nor poverty will be separated from him. I believe that when the phrase "I do" was said, the person who said it was sincere.
But when the difficulties really came, the heart she wanted to escape from was also serious.
Husband and wife were originally the same forest birds, and they flew separately in the face of great trouble. People have the instinct to seek advantages and avoid harm, in the face of life changes, do you choose to accompany you for a lifetime, does the person you choose to accompany you for a lifetime have the courage and persistence to stay by your side and face the tribulations of life with you?
Too many people only see the bright prospects of future life when they enter marriage, but they do not imagine that the boat of marriage will also hit the rocks.
If your chosen wife is not prepared for this, then when you encounter a crisis, you will have to bear not only the crisis itself, but also the escape and betrayal from the people closest to you. Such a blow may be greater than the crisis itself.
Whether the person you choose has a heart that shares your happiness and suffering is more important than whether he has a beautiful appearance.
Two: the heart to live a steady life
When it comes to falling in love, the days are always windy and snowy, romantic and warm, as if every day is like a movie. But after entering the marriage, you will find that life is ultimately oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and garlic, all trivial and boring little things.
Before entering marriage, did you talk to each other about your expectations for the future married life, and what exactly did he want?
No one can always maintain love at the highest and hottest time, no matter how strong the love, it will eventually return to plain, fine water and long flow, moisturizing the silent moisturizing of your heart.
Married life is not as wonderful and sweet as imagined, it may be the weight of the market, the supermarket discount in front of the shelves, the chicken flying dog jumping, these need to be accepted with an inclusive heart, because this is the life you choose.
If you are not prepared for this before marriage, then after entering marriage, the goods will be disappointed, irritable, and quarrelsome. If her expectations for marriage are still as sweet as when she was in love, then you should be more cautious about your choice of marriage.
Three: Fit the concept of money
No matter how much you are in love, once you enter marriage, you face the inability to escape the control and domination of money, then whether the two people's views on money are compatible is particularly important.
Some people are willing to buy a bag with a month's salary, and he feels that this is a reward for himself, and he is enjoyed. Some people order a takeaway, two dollars of delivery fee he has to calculate for half a day, he feels that this is in the thrift of the family.
It cannot be said which of these two views is wrong, but the collision of these two views is bound to cause quarrels.
If the attitude of two people to money is not unified, even when in love, under the wrapping of love, such a contradiction does not appear or stimulate, then after entering marriage, there are more places to use money, and the husband and wife have become an economic community, then such a contradiction is an untimed bomb buried between you, and I don't know when it will explode.
Two people getting married and living together is not only the only way to love each other, but more importantly, the consistency of the three views. Marriage is a big ship, and if the helmsmen on the ship have different directions, then the ship can only spin around in place, or even sink.
Warm at first sight is easy, and gentleness is the most rare. Don't rush into marriage because of the heat of being in love. In marriage, there are too many things that are more important than love that you need to study for a lifetime.