Doing this well will help solve your child's boredom!

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A child wants to be motivated in learning, there are two prerequisites, the first learning is the child's own business, and the second is that he must have the ability to take responsibility.

Hello everyone, I'm Shen Jiahong.

In the consultation, many times parents say that their children lack motivation to learn, and even have boredom and refusal to learn.

I often ask the parents of these children, "Do the children do housework in the family?" ”

Many times, the answer of parents is negative, they say that children do nothing in the family, basically food to open their mouths, clothes to reach out, like brushing pots and washing dishes, sweeping the floor, even including their own clothes, children will not do.

Then, I ask the parents, "Is learning worrying about the child or is the parent worried?" ”

Parents basically answer that they are worried.

Then, we will see that for the child's learning, the first is not in the child's hands, and the second, because he does nothing at home, then he loses the ability to take responsibility.

Therefore, we say that once the child has these two situations in the family, the child's motivation to learn is basically not too strong.

So, how to find a solution to this child's motivation to learn?

First of all, let the child learn to take responsibility for his own things.

If he is not able to take responsibility for his own affairs, it is difficult to make him take responsibility for his studies.

So the parents asked, "Sometimes we let the child do housework, he is not willing to do it, we can't do this?" ”

In fact, we will see parents let their children do housework, they do not do it, and in the end many times parents will do it for them.

Don't underestimate the child doing housework, the child does housework not only by doing housework, but also allows our children to find a sense of success, so that children can find a sense of value.

More importantly, by doing housework, children can find the ability to take responsibility for their own affairs.

Then, when the child regards learning as his own thing, he will also take on this responsibility, including listening carefully to the lectures in class, doing the classwork carefully, and being able to successfully complete the homework when he returns.

It's all about the ability to take responsibility.

So, in what ways to cultivate children's ability to be responsible?

We can cultivate our children's ability to take responsibility by doing housework.

When the parent says that I let the child do what he does not want to do, I will discuss with the parents in the treatment room, there are some things that if our parents don't do it, can he really not do it?

For example, for the simple matter of washing clothes, I will ask parents: "Do you usually help your children wash clothes?" ”

Many parents may say, "Wash, if we don't wash, the child himself will not wash!" ”

Then, I would continue to discuss with my parents, "Suppose we don't wash his underwear and socks, do you think he won't wash them and keep them there?" ”

Well, it is clear that this thing is imagined by the parents.

If we don't wash our child's underwear and socks, he won't have underwear and socks to change after a few days, and then he'll have to choose to wash off his dirty underwear and dirty socks, or he'll have to keep wearing them.

So, there are some things that when our parents don't do it, the children themselves will do it themselves.

A lot of times, we take it for granted that if we don't do it, then the child won't do it, so we take it all up. When our parents do this, the child slowly becomes less willing to take responsibility for his affairs.

Some parents say that washing clothes is very simple now, so we can just throw our clothes in the washing machine. I would say to my parents, "First of all, he's going to throw it himself, right?" And he also needs to dry after washing, right? After the clothes are dried, he also needs to collect them, right? ”

Then, I would ask my parents, "Suppose you wash his clothes, will you collect them for him?" Will you fold it for him? ”

My parents said, "These are all dragons, and we'll do it all." ”

Then, I told my parents, "From now on, if you continue to help your child wash clothes, can you not collect it for him, can you not fold it for him, but let the child collect his own clothes and fold his own clothes?" ”

Even for such an arrangement, some parents will worry about whether the child will be angry and whether the child will not be dissatisfied with themselves.

So, we see that obviously this is not simple, it is not only a matter of doing things for the child, but more importantly, our parents will worry that the child does not like him, and will worry that the child will not be happy with him.

In this, we see that parents have such a need to please their children. When we keep asking children for this part of the favor, there are many things we will do for them.

I said to my parents, "Doing laundry is not simply doing housework, if you really want your child to be able to get out of school and refuse to learn, you have to start slowly from this matter!"

Therefore, you should not simply think of the washing of clothes as a matter of habits of behavior, it is a method of treatment, a method of change, a drug. ”

When I say this, parents suddenly reflect, "Oh, it turns out that this part can help the child like a drug." ”

Yes, we need to start from these small things, and cultivate the child's ability to do housework and take responsibility for his own things.

As parents, we can't take care of everything that belongs to our children. In this way, it is difficult for our children to take responsibility for their own affairs.

Then, if our child does not take responsibility for his own homework, it will be difficult for him to take responsibility for learning.

Therefore, we say that if we want to solve the problem of children's boredom and refusal to learn, if we want to solve the problem of children's motivation to learn, we must start from doing housework, and slowly cultivate children's ability to take responsibility for their own affairs.

Well, today's sharing is here, thank you!

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