Affected by family planning, it is believed that many families are mostly only children, so parents' love for their children has only increased. I would like to give all my things to my children, to meet any demands made by my children, and I can't see my children being hurt a little. But as a parent, there is no correct guidance for the child, so that the child's psychology has a distorted change, once the child's requirements are not met, then the child will vent bad emotions on the parents.
However, children will have this mentality, part of the reason comes from the daily family education of parents, because children have been in a long-term situation no matter what kind of requirements they put forward, parents will meet them. I have never experienced hardship, I have been in the sweet jar of the family, and I may not know how to write the word hard, so I will not experience the hard work of my parents.
Therefore, the child has developed a pampered habit of the disease, feel that everything that his parents give himself is taken for granted, and will not feel cherished for the fruits of his parents' labor. I was touched by a video on the social platform before, and I was deeply touched by the child in the video, who punched and kicked his mother. After reading it, I learned this reason, it turned out that the child was angry because his mother did not buy electronic products for himself, so he punched and kicked his mother.
But the most incomprehensible thing is that the mother did not fight back, the child's grandmother saw it, and came up to stop it, but the child did not listen to the dissuasion and still did not stop. While laying his hands down, he said to his mother that buying an electronic product would not satisfy him, and how to give him a good life in the future.
Children think that their parents cannot meet their own requirements, that is, they do not pay attention to themselves, so they will also have a rebellious psychology. The child looked like he was a teenager, and he only knew how to blindly ask his parents for it, and his parents could not be satisfied, and they also punched and kicked their parents. Do not understand the hard work of parents, do not know how to be grateful for returns, this situation once a long time, the child's psychology will become distorted.
1. Parents spoil their children unconditionally
Basically, parents are very doting on their children, but if parents take too much care of their children, they will also make children lose the ability to take care of themselves. With the seriousness of the parents' protection of the short, the child has also become the demon king of the world, no matter how unreasonable things are done, the parents will not scold.
Some parents dote on their children to do homework for their children, afraid that their children will not be able to finish writing and stay up late, and whenever their children are late for class, they will also take leave for their children and will not let their children bear any responsibility. Children have been in this situation of parental protection for a long time, and once they encounter problems that are difficult to solve, they will be vulnerable.
2. The child's three views are influenced by the parents
In any case, most of the habits of the child are affected by the daily life of the parents, if the parents have the psychology of loving to show off, then the child will also have the psychology of loving to show off and compare. Parents also like to communicate with parents who have superior family conditions in their daily lives, and often say in their children's ears the benefits of having money, and children grow up in this environment from an early age, and it is inevitable that they will have incorrect three views.
3, parents do not appreciate the elders
Some parents not only do not treat the elderly kindly, but also do not do a good job of parental responsibility, then children naturally will not be grateful to their parents. When the child grows up, when the parents complain to the people around them that the child is not filial piety, they should also think about whether they treated the elderly well when they were young. For example, if parents are not filial to their children's grandparents and do not take care of and support the elderly, then children will naturally not take care of and support their parents when they grow up.
1. Let children participate in family labor from an early age
Parents do not think that the child is small, do not need to let the child do some family work, according to the child's health situation, to the child to customize some easier housework. Slowly cultivate children's labor ability, let children do what they can, do not blindly protect children, and let children live under their own wings. Let children learn to tidy up their own rooms, so that children can experience the hardships of life in the process of labor, so they can also appreciate the difficulties of parents.
2. Parents should guide their children to establish correct three views
Parents should not interfere too much in their children's friendship, but children should make friends with the same interests and hobbies according to their own preferences, and do not blindly judge the quality of their children's friends according to their grades. Now the child's ability to learn is not very prominent, but there are their own shining points in other specialties, and the child can also learn some new knowledge from friends.
Everyone has a shining point, parents guide their children to establish the correct three views, in the process of getting along with their children, but also to think differently. Parents to understand what the child really wants, children to experience the parents in life is not easy.
3. Educate children to know how to be grateful
Parents should also be kind to their elderly, but also grateful for the elderly's nurturing grace, children will also hear about it, when the parents are old, they will also be grateful to their parents. When you meet someone who helps you in life, you should also say thank you to others, and teach your child to help each other when getting along with others. In your leisure time, you can take your child to read some grateful books, or watch some gratitude movies to let your child develop a grateful heart.
4. Correct your child's mistakes in a timely manner
When the child is ignorant, some mistakes can be forgiven, and once the child has his own thoughts, he must correct the mistakes made by the child in time. If you blindly let the child make this mistake, and the parents do not correct it in time, then the child thinks that this mistake can be made, and will continue to make this mistake in later life. When children make mistakes, parents must not use violence to counter violence with violence while correcting, and it is not right to patiently explain this matter.
Summary:
As the saying goes: "The son does not teach, the father's fault", parents must set a good example by example in daily life, and establish the correct three views for their children. Teach your child at the right age to do what he can.
Let them develop the good habit of independent life and self-care, so that children can gradually break away from their parents' wings. Parents should cultivate their children's self-care ability from an early age, after all, they cannot always accompany their children, only if they let their children experience it themselves, can they understand the difficulties of parents.
【Transferred from: Sohu original - pillow parenting said】