1. My brother-in-law went out to the downstairs commissary to buy cigarettes, and his Huawei phone stayed at home. Suddenly there was a call. As soon as I saw the display of "10010 icon", I hung up without much thought!?

1. My brother-in-law went out to the downstairs commissary to buy cigarettes, and his Huawei phone stayed at home. Suddenly there was a call. As soon as I saw the display of "10010 icon", I hung up without much thought!? After a while, 10010 sent a text message: "Why don't you answer the phone?" "I felt very uneasy, and the rose reminded God of the past. My niece's familiar voice came from the phone: "Daddy, why don't you answer my call?" My living expenses have been spent. Please call me as soon as possible! "I immediately understood what 10010 meant.

2. When I was in college in Shandong, I went back to my hometown in Shanghai with my parents for a while. In the evening, I took a shower and found that my father had several holes in his underwear, so I asked him why he didn't buy one again. Dad smiled and said, "It's not about saving money to get you to college." "I was very touched to hear this. At this point, my mother came over and shouted, "Don't pull, taking off your pants in front of other little girls won't embarrass you!" ”

3. I went out to run Didi at night and pulled a beautiful girl. After getting in the car, she said, "Brother, run everywhere!" "I said, girl, this is Didi, not rented. The girl said arrogantly, "Brother, I don't need money." Run, listen to me! I got angry at once and ran along the wall with the girl. An hour later, I kindly reminded, "Sister, 300!" The girl looked at it and said, "Brother, are you taking a detour?" How can you get so much money when you pull from the south gate of the city wall to my goose pagoda? I immediately raised my guard: "Sister, you said you would run as you pleased. The girl said unhappily, "If you can prove that I said those things, I'll marry you!" "I said I couldn't prove it. I'm out of luck. I don't want money. The girl was worried: "Brother, Didi recorded the whole process of the car." Check it out. You must have said it. Check it out and you'll know! "I'm getting more and more vigilant. Even if I put 300 backwards, it doesn't prove that you're right?

A scientist went to the market and bought two experimental subjects. He stopped in front of a monkey stall. The scientist pointed to a monkey and asked: How much does this monkey cost? The peddler said: Five thousand dollars, please do not question the price. This is a monkey who only writes program code. The scientist pointed to another and asked: What about this? Supplier a: 10,000 yuan, because it is a website engineer! The scientist asked the third monkey. The peddler said: Just 100,000 yuan. Honestly, his technique I don't know what it would be, but those two guys just called it boss!

5. Programmers can graduate from college with an annual salary of 400,000. On the first day of work, the graduate student looked at the project and said: I think your company is not suitable for me. I'd better leave!! The supervisor was confused and didn't understand why he left as soon as he joined the company. Then the supervisor asked the graduate student: Can you tell me why? The graduate student said: You have a Buddha statue in your code. I'm not sure. "

6. My sister-in-law is a 7,000-year-old student at 211 University. After graduation, she worked as a quality inspector in an oil field. Today I was watching TV at home when my sister-in-law suddenly came back. She said to me in frustration: Sister-in-law, I was fired by the company today! I was surprised and said: Huh? You are so beautiful and excellent. Why did the company fire you? Sister-in-law: Because I am so beautiful! Me: Huh? That's a far-fetched reason, isn't it? Sister-in-law: The company's employees are all men. Quality accidents have occurred frequently since I went there?

7. After my father became a supervisor, he spent 6 million yuan to buy me a house in a big city. The elevator broke down after work today. I'm going to climb the stairs. Next to him was a delivery man carrying a large 50-kilogram box on his back. He was also climbing stairs layer by floor. I couldn't bear to chat with him on the 22nd floor. The delivery man gasped and said to me, "Brother, thank you! I patted him on the shoulder and said, "You're welcome, give me the fried chicken I ordered." ”

8. Goddess: "I want to find a husband who can cook." What will you cook? Scumbag: "There are a lot of mushrooms, chicken, stewed ribs and pickled fish. Then the slag man took the goddess home and held out his hand. It's all instant noodles. Then the goddess married the scumbag. Ten years later, the scumbag asked, "When you knew all my dishes were instant noodles, why did you marry me?" The goddess sneered, "This is the first time I've seen someone blow such fresh and delicate instant noodles." I think you are also a considerate person! "#Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph##幽默 #