Hello everyone, I take the time out of my busy schedule today to bring you the following article, welcome to taste it together!
Now there is a popular saying in society: children are born by their mothers, raised by mothers, and parents and mothers come to watch.
This is also the most distressing thing for women in the new era, who want to go to work, but look at the children who are waiting to be fed and helpless; being a full-time mother at home is suffocated, and paying more is not valued.
Although it is a love for the mother-in-law to help with the baby, if there is an agreement to be at ease, there will inevitably be mustard in the heart, and this is the beginning of the war between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law.
The mother-in-law promised to help bring the child after giving birth, and the child became angry when the child was born
Xiaoxue discussed with her husband before getting married, no children within three years, and wanted to work hard for her career, so that she would not worry about the small things in life in the future, and her husband also agreed happily.
But shortly after Xiaoxue was married, her mother-in-law came, and she urged her to have a child quickly. It seems that the words are heavy, but in fact, I still hope that Xiaoxue can pass on the lineage as soon as possible.
Xiaoxue did not care about her mother-in-law's words, and always joked about it. Later, the mother-in-law invited Xiaoxue's mother over, and promised that after the child was born, she did not need a small snow pipe, and she should go to work and bring it herself.
At this time, Xiaoxue's husband began to waver and began to fantasize about the good life after having a baby.
In the end, Xiaoxue still failed to carry the repeated urging of a large family and became pregnant with a child, but after giving birth, her mother-in-law became the "king of throwing pots".
Not only do you not ask about the child, but also come once every two or three days in the month, and the husband is busy with work and has no time to take care of it, or his mother is busy before and after.
After sitting on the confinement, Xiaoxue saw that her mother-in-law had not yet expressed her position, so she joked: "Mother-in-law, don't you mean to help me bring the child after giving birth?" Or just live on my side. ”
But the mother-in-law said: "People are old, their bodies are useless, they can't withstand the toss of children, and the children they give birth to are responsible for themselves." You young people will have survived, and when the children are in kindergarten, you can go to work. ”
At that time, Xiao Xue's face was green, and she directly angered her mother-in-law: "You don't help me with the baby, I won't help you retire in the future, people are mutual." ”
Who knows the mother-in-law smiled and said: "Legally I have no obligation to bring a baby, but it stipulates that you have the obligation to give me a pension."
After listening to this sentence, Xiao Xue became even more angry: "You are not good to me, don't count on me in the future, when you are sick, you can't count on your son to take care of you." ”
The two quarreled red-faced, and the mother-in-law went out directly with a sigh of relief.
Although Xiaoxue was addicted, in the end, the matter was not resolved, but it buried hidden dangers for the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. A wise daughter-in-law will not be directly intimidated by this situation.
Mother-in-law is different from mother,000,you can't say whatever you want, you still have to be scrupulous. After all, a quarrel will cause estrangement in the heart, and it is more difficult to coexist peacefully in the later stage.
A clever daughter-in-law would do that
1, let the husband and mother-in-law consult
A wise daughter-in-law will never be quick to talk, and there are contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and the husband is the best conciliator.
For example, in the case of Xiaoxue, the mother-in-law obviously promised to help take care of the child, but the child was born but regretted it, it is better to discuss it with her husband, knocking on the side and saying: "If I don't go to work, the family's mortgage and car loan will be hard husband you alone." ”
If the husband really feels that the work pressure is great, he will take the initiative to discuss with his mother, and the result will definitely be different from the communication between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law. If the mother-in-law refuses, when there is an incident in the future, the husband will also know which side to take.
2. Learn to think differently
People should also learn to think in a different position, the elderly have struggled all their lives, and when they are old, they want to enjoy the blessings of happiness, and they are not willing to take children anymore.
Moreover, the old man is indeed not obliged to help with the baby, just affection, do not deliberately force. Be prepared before giving birth to a child, after all, the child is your own, even if the other party coaxes you to have judgment.
3. Maintain rational communication
There are two types of daughters-in-law who are the most irrational, one is Xiao Xue's quick tongue, which lays hidden dangers for the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law; the other is that she does not explain the key points, and whenever the mother-in-law talks about her own sad history, she begins to soften her heart.
Since we want to talk about it, we should talk about it in a principled way, and if we hesitate and hesitate, we will not blame others in the end.
Because of the problem of carrying a baby, many daughters-in-law and mother-in-law will have contradictions. In fact, from another point of view, their own children will be closer, and there are indeed many problems in the way the older generation raises children.
Don't resent the mother-in-law because she doesn't help with the baby, proper understanding will make the family more harmonious.