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"Try to find people of similar age when getting married, don't be more than three years old, marry older men, and finally get involved in 3 generations."
This is a mother's advice to her 23-year-old daughter.
Aunt Wang's daughter was born in 1998, with good facial features and a tall figure, and there has been no shortage of suitors behind her.
She was busy with her studies and had no time to fall in love, but now she has graduated from college and has been working for half a year.
Aunt Wang feels that it is only a matter of time before her daughter falls in love when she is older, and even talks about marriage, so there are some things she wants to tell her daughter in advance.
What she did not expect was that although her daughter was young, her thinking was exceptionally mature.
She said something unexpected to Aunt Wang:
"I already know this truth, you see that the great uncle is 8 years older than the great aunt, and the great aunt has not had a few good days in this life." Since the age of 45, he has shouldered the responsibility of supporting his family, and now he has to take care of his uncle who is paralyzed in bed when he is old. Look at you and your father, you are the same age, you have always raised a family together, relying on each other. ”
Aunt Wang never imagined that her daughter would be so good at observing life and having her own judgment on everything.
"Marry someone and don't marry an older man", this is the mother's advice to her daughter, and it is also a good word.
From the perspective of parents and girls, this sentence does not mean anything discriminatory, they just say a reality, even a bloody lesson.
There are too many lessons from the past, and everyone is naturally willing to learn lessons, sum up experience, and not let others fall over and fall again.
Everyone has such a thought, it is very normal, after all, marriage is a lifelong event, who will not think about themselves?
In this matter, young girls do not marry older men in the same way that girls avoid phoenix men and ma bao men.
Marrying an older man, it is three generations that suffer
Marriage has never been just a matter of two people, but a matter of two families, and it can be expanded a little, which is actually a matter of three generations.
As a result, girls are greatly affected by three generations after marrying an older man.
01 Parents are more stressed
The older man means that his parents are older, the parents are older, and naturally they cannot help their sons and daughters-in-law in life, and this burden will eventually fall on the woman's parents.
In order to help their daughters reduce their burden, many parents will take on the responsibility of bringing their grandchildren, and some will even give corresponding financial subsidies.
As a result, the old age of the woman's parents will be relatively hard.
But if women are not looking for older men, but men of similar age, the results will be completely different.
Young men mean that their parents are young, and in-laws can help their lives to a certain extent.
02 Women suffer in middle age
Women need to face decades of long time after marrying an older man, and due to the huge age difference, women's middle-aged and elderly people will have a very hard time.
Men's bodies age faster than women, many men have various health problems as soon as they pass 50, even if he is not physically ill, he will face the problem of unemployment when he is older, and at this time all the burdens will fall on women's shoulders.
I once met an aunt in her 40s who worked two jobs alone, working as a housekeeper during the day and as a cleaner at night.
No way, the husband is old, can't find a job, even if he finds it, it can only be a low-income job such as security.
In order to give her children money to study, she had to carry a mountain alone.
This is a woman's middle age, and a woman's old age will be more sad.
As the saying goes, "Young couples come and go." "The reason why a person gets married is so that in the future, when he is old, he can have a person by his side, and the husband and wife can take care of each other."
But for women who marry older men, the results are diametrically opposed.
From a natural and physiological point of view, there is a 95% chance that a woman will act as a perennial nanny.
She will take care of her sick husband in bed until he leaves this world, and after his husband is gone, she will face the rest of her life alone, after all, most of her children are not around.
03 Children start low
It is also unfair for a woman to marry an older man to a child, and unless the man has strong financial conditions and has already prepared a house and a car for the future child, the child's life will be difficult.
If a man doesn't get married until he's around 35, it means he's in his 50s when the child goes to junior high school.
What does this mean for children?
The child needs to spend money, and when he is rebelling, it is when he is most powerless.
Not the most terrible, the most terrible is an older man, who can raise his children to adulthood is already good, and it is almost impossible to buy him a house and a car.
In this extremely competitive contemporary society, without the support of parents, the child loses at the starting line at the beginning, and his life may be more difficult than his father.
Some people may say that they do not support children to eat the old, in fact, parents who say such things are not responsible for themselves, because the changes of the times are like this, and the current situation is like this.
This is an era of fighting daddy, two generations work together to create a better life, and people with six relatives and no one else have a harder time living than others.
You say that your inability to work so glamorously, but instead give the child a big hat, it is really speechless.
Unless the other party is particularly good, marrying the same age is the best choice for women
Many women are love brains, deceived by others' words and two words, and their brains are full of love and love, but they do not care about real life at all.
Life is realistic, chai rice oil and salt are realistic, food, clothing, housing and transportation are also realistic.
Life is not only the present, but also the future.
If you think more about the future, you will not act impulsively, and you will not let your parents and children be wronged because of your own momentary confusion.
When a man is older, he must make up for the age disadvantage by several times the advantage of other men, otherwise he is not worthy of being chosen.
Marriage is a woman's 2nd reincarnation, and what kind of man to choose will directly determine your future.
Sober women tend to live better, are you sober-headed?
I am Shadow, an original author who focuses on the field of emotion.