1, the female secretary is pregnant, the boss let her drain, the female secretary insisted on returning to her hometown in Gansu to give birth. Before leaving, the female secretary said to the boss: "How to notify you when you are born?" ”...... Boss: "Zhang postcard

1, the female secretary is pregnant, the boss let her drain, the female secretary insisted on returning to her hometown in Gansu to give birth. Before leaving, the female secretary said to the boss: "How to notify you when you are born?" ”...... Boss:" Zhang postcard to me, written on, Lanzhou ramen. ”...... A few months later, the boss left work, his wife handed a postcard, and the boss fainted after receiving it and was taken to the hospital. The doctor asked: What stimulated the shock past? The wife said: After seeing a postcard, I fell. ...... The doctor took the postcard and read: Four bowls of Lanzhou ramen; two bowls with sausages, two bowls without...

2, a new guy from the construction site, the first day of work without wearing a hard hat was seen by the boss inspection, he criticized him for not wearing a hard hat, the guy said that he would do iron head work, the hard hat is not as hard as his head, pick up a brick with his hand, hand it to the boss and say: "I don't believe you shoot, if I shake it I am your grandson." The boss looked at his vows, raised the brick and slapped it hard, and the boy fell down with a "ah" sound, holding the boss's leg and shouting, "Your grandson really shoots, I bragged about it, see I blackmailed you today." Oops..."

3, today after work home through the street, several elderly people are about to retire, have to live a good life of pension!! One of them has been retired for four years. Everyone asked, "Is retirement good?" The old man smiled and said, "The first two years were very good." The crowd asked, "What about the next two years?" Isn't that good?? The old man frowned and said, "In the next two years, my wife also retired." ”

4. The brother-in-law is a security guard in the Tomson Yipin Community, and today he sat in a Maserati with a man and a woman. The brother-in-law walked over to the man and asked, "Hey, what are you doing??? The man replied, "I'm reading the newspaper, and she's knitting a sweater." The brother-in-law asked, "How old are you??? The man replied, "I'm 18!!! Then he looked at his watch again and said, "She has 10 minutes left to be 18." ”

5. Since joining the celebrity group, the girlfriend has changed, and the husband who has abandoned love for ten years has remarried to a very rich old man. Since then, the girlfriend has stopped eating greens and eating yak beef at every meal. I said to her, "Eating more greens is good for your body." She said, "It's all right, don't cows graze?" I also indirectly ate it, haha! I was stunned for a few seconds and asked, "Have you ever eaten dog meat?" ”

6. Happy times are always too short, what should I do if I drink the sugar water of others? So I didn't do it, I didn't stop, and when I was in class, I raised my hand and called the report: Teacher, she stole something in class! At that time, she cried and said that I had drunk all her water, and made a small report, telling me to wait, she must take revenge. I just didn't expect that today, after more than twenty years, she still can't forget... This is not just to take revenge, you come in... She was really my elementary school table mate! "

7, girlfriend in the third year of college made a boyfriend, is a pure love of the little boy. The brother once went out with the boy, it was too late, staying in the hotel, this girl herself was confused and fell asleep in bed, and the next day woke up to see that her boyfriend was still sitting at the table reading a book! She asked, "What did you do last night?" Boyfriend: I read a penal book one night...?

8, the company team building, live in the wild at night, at night I took advantage of the fact that there was no one around, went to the female secretary's tent. After returning to the company, everyone surrounded me and asked me if I had confessed success? I said: You can see the result by looking at my face. Colleagues asked: Even if you don't agree, why did you beat you so badly? I said: I didn't know that she and her sister were twins, so I hugged the wrong person in the tent and confessed to be her sister. It happened that her brother-in-law came in and was beaten by her brother-in-law. A colleague wondered: Her brother-in-law beat you, why didn't her sister pull next to you? Me: If it weren't for her sister pulling me away, I would have run out earlier.

9, the husband went to take a shower, and a female friend on his mobile phone sent a message: What are you doing? On a whim, I replied: I was thinking of you. The other person said: Really? I felt bored, so I replied: I sent the message just now, I am his wife. The other party seconds back: Great! I wondered: Huh? What's too good? The other party said: While they are not there, let's talk for a while, right? I'm her husband!?

10, the wife came home from overtime at night, and when she came back, she wanted to rain and rain. I was seriously ill this morning, so I went to the hospital and came back with Chinese medicine. The doctor asked her to pay more attention to rest, and when I got home, I began to give my wife medicine. At this time, my friend came to visit the door and asked me curiously: Why do you need to use a wok to boil medicine? The wife is sick and has to rush to answer: because he has not washed the other pots!

11, the husband's family loves to play mahjong, their family is big, almost everyone can play mahjong. Before getting married, my mother-in-law was satisfied with me everywhere, but one of them could not play mahjong, and he gave the order to die, and he could not get married without learning to play mahjong. I was also drunk, of course, I learned later, and I was very talented, and for several years I had been running through the family, and no one could beat me. Now my mother-in-law advised me to quit the jianghu, otherwise our family would be expelled from the clan!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #