1, there are always people in the office with the pen on my desk, do not greet me in advance, say many times is useless. To this day, I replaced 4 of my 5 pens with auto-fading refills.

1, there are always people in the office with the pen on my desk, do not greet me in advance, say many times is useless. To this day, I replaced 4 of my 5 pens with auto-fading refills. Now they finally knew they had to say hello.

2, a girl took a fancy to my buddy, but unfortunately the buddy already had a girlfriend not long ago. The sister wanted me to match it, and she meant: I am not married, anything is possible. I talked to my buddies, and the buddies said, "I know that girl, in fact, I like that girl, but my girlfriend is so good, I will never empathize with it!" Come, show you my girlfriend's trophy..." I glanced at the photo on his phone, and the trophy was impressively engraved: Ichisanda Champion...

3. Visit your old classmates on a business trip! He welcomed me very warmly! After dinner, his father said to me: Come here! Stay for one night. I have already booked the hotel! But I had to agree to it! Then I watched as the family made room for me, changed the bedding... Later, I said to my classmates, "Your customs are very special!" Guests stay for one night when they come. He said, "It's not as special as you think!" My dad was kind to everyone! You are the first to take it seriously. ”

4, junior high school has a day and night self-study, I and my cousin and a few children in the village rushed home, taking advantage of their fighting kung fu, I sneaked into the grass in front of the river and hid. Wait for them to come to me. Suddenly it came out to scare them, and several children ran backwards screaming in fright. Only my cousin turned around, flew up, and kicked me directly into the river.

5, Fa Xiao was originally an employee of the electronics factory, but then won a lot of money playing mahjong with friends, simply quit his job and returned to his hometown to open a mahjong hall. Now fa xiao annual income million, shouting for us to go to the newly opened bathing center nearby to take a bath. When I went in, I took off my clothes and saw that he had a tattoo of a fly, and we were all puzzled. The bath master asked: Boy, everyone tattoos are tattooed dragons, tigers or Guan Gong or something, why did you tattoo a butt fly? After listening to it, Fa Xiao said in a serious tone: Alas, no culture is really terrible, no wonder you have been scrubbing for a lifetime, this is called 'must win' light rubbing, don't let me fly.

6, the last time I went out with my classmates, I called two taxis because there were too many people, I led the way in front, and several of them followed behind. After getting into the car, I said to the master, "Master, there are people following us." The master said, "Well, got it!" As A result, as I walked and found that the taxi behind me was missing, I asked the master, "What about the taxi in the back?" Only to see the master said solemnly: "Rest assured, get rid of it!" ”

7. The new 22-year-old female employee came to me every three to five to ask for leave. I was in a meeting that day, and she answered the phone and everyone heard her say, "Okay, I'll go now, and I'll just say I have a stomachache." Anyway, our manager was good at coaxing. After the call, she stood up and said, "Manager, I want to take a leave of absence!" Me: "You have a stomachache, go ahead, I'm good at coaxing!" Then, she nodded in agreement and really left...

8) A famous doctor said in a chat with an acquaintance: "I have been treating people for 30 years. During this time, I prescribed them all kinds of prescriptions, but in the end I came to the conclusion that the best medicine to cure people's diseases was love. "What if that doesn't work either?" "Then double the dose and find a fat daughter-in-law." The doctor answered.

9, just a certain insurance company called me, saying that I only need to save two hundred yuan a month, and if I died seventy years ago, I have a subsidy of one million yuan. I instantly remembered that when I was in my sixties, my children knelt in front of me with a bowl of medicine, cried and said, "Dad, please drink the medicine." Scared me to throw away my phone!

10, this day Meng Meng walked into the office, quietly walked to The big east side, the big east is very curious. Meng Meng: Brother Dong, do you know who the person who recently promoted the manager of our company is? Daito: Who? Meng Meng: Who else, it's you, I listen to the director! Daito: Really? What did the director say? Meng Meng: Yesterday I secretly heard at the door of the director's office, the director said to the secretary, let's select the manager this time, we have to find a faceless, but also like to seduce the director, this is not to say you! Daito: I'm going...

11, the boyfriend has always been generous in spending money, not long after our relationship, he realized that this way of spending money is not good, so he handed me the salary card for safekeeping. A while ago in the playground playing, he saw a cute little girl who couldn't turn her eyes, I looked at it and liked it, pointed at the little girl and said to him: "If only we had such a cute child in the future." Boyfriend: "That's it?" Easy to do, I can make you realize this wish now. "Then I went over and gave 100 yuan to the little girl and told her that if I called out to my mother, the money would go to her...

12. After eating, I put my finger in the shape of a gun and aimed it at the middle of my wife's brain shell, and shot at the skin. Then I asked my wife: "If this is a real gun, the bullet passed through, you did not die, why?" The wife was stunned for five seconds, and said weakly: "Yes... Is it because I don't have a brain? I said, "Yes." "After a few minutes she started to get angry...

13, as an otaku, often buy daily necessities online. Yesterday I went to SF to pick up the courier, and when I got home, I found that I took it wrong. When I opened it, it was a fairy dress inside, and I instantly made up that the other party was a cute girl. So I seized the opportunity to take off the order and quickly contacted the courier brother. After my efforts, I am already with the courier guy!

14, whenever you fall asleep, the other in the body you will wake up, and then start to go out to maintain peace, fight crime, find missing children, save the lost girl, after a whole night of busy, the sky is dark to drag the tired body back to bed, and soon after the alarm clock woke you up, still wondering why you always can't get up in the morning.