"After the second child, I became a full-time wife, abandoned by my in-laws": love, let people chicken feathers

01

There is a saying in the Book of Poetry: "Death and life are broad, and the son is said." Holding the hand of the son, growing old with the son. ”

True love should transcend time and sublimate to reality, so that you and I can work together to the end of life. Perhaps, snuggling up to each other and getting old is the wish of countless people.

But is there really such a beautiful love in reality?

Yes, but very little. You know, the essence of marriage is to let two strangers who are not related by blood run into each other, build a family in compromise, get married and have children, and live together for a lifetime.

It is easy to start a family, it is easy to get married and have children, but it is difficult to live together for a lifetime. Because people are creatures that like the new and hate the old, and are prone to disgust, this is doomed to marriage with more contradictions and less harmony.

When in love, both men and women can say something sweet, you coax me, I coax you. In the first few years of marriage, both husband and wife can tolerate each other, grace and love. But what about a few years later?

Theoretically, when marriage reaches its seventh year, both spouses basically live their own lives. Realistically, as long as the husband and wife get along for five years, they are generally tired.

Especially in modern society, people's hearts are impetuous, resulting in marriages that will only become more and more fragile. For the vast majority of people, there is only one chicken feather left.

02

"After the second child, I became a full-time wife and was looked down upon by my in-laws."

Reader Miss Zhang left a message in the background some time ago, talking about her marriage experience.

Miss Zhang and her husband, Mr. Liu, are college classmates, in love for seven years, and finally returned to their hometown to get married and have children. Miss Zhang originally thought that getting married meant that the two of them had achieved positive results and could start a fairy tale life.

Of course, in the three years after marriage, Mr. Liu was particularly kind to Miss Zhang, not only obeying her, but also changing different tricks every day to make her happy, anyway, she felt like a little princess, being held in the palm of her hand.

Especially when she was pregnant with her first child, Mr. Liu also promised his wife that I would take good care of your mother and son in the future, even if you became old and ugly, I would treat you as before.

The continuous sweet words made Miss Zhang particularly satisfied. Women, who are creatures that are easily moved, are said a few good words, and there is no rationality.

After the first child was born, because it was a daughter, the in-laws were particularly unhappy, and gave her a look on her face, and even told her that she hoped that she could have another one, preferably a boy. And her husband did not even stand on her side.

In fact, Miss Zhang also feels that it is better to have a second child. So after a year of recuperation, she took the time to prepare for pregnancy. But the problem came, it just so happened that the company was laying off employees, and she bore the brunt of it.

03

Miss Zhang, who was dismissed, basically has no financial resources, wants to find a job, it is difficult to find, there is no enterprise to want, want to have a second child, and are afraid of being looked down upon without money. As a result, she was torn between the two sides.

However, her husband still told her that after giving birth to a second child, even if you can't find a job, I will raise you, and you should not think too much.

A round of sea oath mountain alliance, sweet words down, Miss Zhang believed, but also successfully conceived the second child, and finally gave birth to a son. There was no way, for the sake of her two children, she could only become a stay-at-home mother.

In the past two years, coinciding with a bad environment and a depressed economy, her husband's salary has not only dropped, but he is also facing a severe problem of layoffs. It is this incident that directly intensifies the contradictions between the husband and wife.

Every time Miss Zhang asked her husband for money to buy milk powder, or to buy some baby products for the child, the husband was always impatient, and said that she would only ask for money, had no face at all, and did not know how to understand the hardships of men.

Even the in-laws of the in-laws, or the eldest brother and sister-in-law, sarcastically said that her life was too good, she did not even work, and directly enjoyed the blessings at home. This made her particularly uncomfortable.

She herself is also very miserable, the in-laws are only good for their grandchildren, but not good for their granddaughters, do they have to abandon their daughters to work? Moreover, no matter how she submits her resume, no one wants it. Businesses would rather have men than women after marriage.

Then, she remembered her husband's commitment and couldn't help but burst into tears, didn't he say to take care of us for a lifetime?

04

Full-time mothers like Miss Zhang, how big is the risk?

To be honest, stay-at-home moms are too risky. They have no financial income, and they have to take care of their children, at any time, they face the risk of being disliked by their husbands and disliked by their in-laws.

Take Miss Zhang, for example, she has to take care of two children, especially the daughter, the in-laws do not like it, and the husband does not say a word, then her pressure is not greater?

In addition, it is basically difficult for women with babies after marriage today to find a job. Because there is no shortage of labor in the market, HR tends to favor unmarried young people and men who work hard. This dooms the situation of stay-at-home mothers to be particularly difficult.

After talking about the internal and external environment, then we may wish to think about a question, is this so-called love really reliable?

It is a pity to say that whether it is men or women, as long as it is the sweet words they say, or the oath of the mountain and the sea, it is generally unreliable. Because people can change, and promises are just casual nonsense, what guarantee is there?

In the case of Miss Zhang, who is right and who is wrong? In-laws are absolutely wrong to prefer sons to daughters. The husband's choice of silence is also his wise protection. And Miss Zhang, who has no income, is also her helplessness.

It can only be said that a marriage is just a calculation of interests. Calculate, calculate, all for yourself. Everyone can't escape the result of a chicken feather. That's all.

Wen/Shushan has deer