He Suohuan, a writer of gender-emotional psychology, writes sentient stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.
I saw a set of data on the Internet: the number of single people on the mainland has reached 240 million.
Once upon a time, when we talked about love, we were still full of longing and expectations, fantasizing about the wind and snow moon of love, Lang Love concubines, you and me.
But at the moment, young people are less and less courageous to fall in love and get married, and choose to be independent and alone.
Love has become a "luxury", and adults no longer talk about love easily, but will think deeply about the price behind love.
This generation of young people is living a "low desire" life.
-01
"Economic conditions" determine the direction of feelings
Young people are reluctant to talk about love, not because they are "poor".
This is mainly the reason why men are reluctant to marry.
Boys who work hard in big cities need to face greater pressure and difficulties if they want to settle here.
Even if you have a high income, it is too difficult to marry a girl who is indigenous to a big city.
High income, can not afford to buy a house, and eventually dragged to more than 30 years old, or to return to their hometown to live.
And boys living in small cities are also facing difficulties.
Bride price, house, car, stable job, income.
There is a chain of contempt in the blind date market, like the "blind date corner" that flourished, which is a grand test for men.
If a boy wants to get married, the hard conditions he needs to face are:
There are cars and houses, there is income, there are deposits.
In addition, the original family must also have a certain economic foundation.
Economic conditions alone are enough to make many people "daunted" by marriage.
It's really hard for young people.
Just a few years after entering social work, the work is still in the ascending period, the savings are not much, the desire to fall in love, but it is hindered by reality.
Who would really want to be single if they had the option?
Even if a person's life is good, in the end we still have to go to marriage.
However, on the road to marriage, we have to go through one obstacle after another.
There is a set of data on the Internet:
40% of girls want their lovers to earn more than 10,000 a month.
From this point of view, we know why boys are less and less courageous to fall in love.
-02
Continuous sexual enjoyment of singleness, intermittent sexual desire for love
This is exactly what most young people have in a relationship mindset.
When they are eager for love and marriage, they are at the trough of life, depressed, hoping to be cared for and comforted by another person.
Seeing people around them in pairs, classmates and friends getting married and having children, they have a feeling of "being abandoned".
The more depressed a person is, the more he longs for the redemption of feelings.
But this mentality is also fleeting, and most of the time, they still enjoy the single life.
Living alone, unrestrained, do not have to worry about love every day.
A person's day can be less expensive, and you can save some money every month.
Living alone, having more selectivity, being able to grasp one's own life.
Of course, there are still some people who live a "low-desire" life because they have an inexplicable fear of intimacy in their hearts.
Worried that they will not have a good marriage, bad feelings, and no ability and sense of responsibility to bear the days of two people together.
Some people tend to overestimate the energy that love brings to themselves, and some people tend to overestimate their performance in relationships.
Two people who have never known each other, because of their feelings, come together, which means that the next life will be tied to each other.
Different living habits, different concepts, different behaviors, and different mentalities towards feelings.
The more I think about it, the deeper the idea of young people being single becomes.
-03
Marriage is a low-return option for young people
Many people tend to consider the cost and return of doing something when doing something.
People want to choose something that is cost-effective, not something that is extremely low-value.
Relationships are not stable, and marriages are even more so.
When more and more people change their mentality, marriage is no longer an "unwavering" thing for them, but becomes a combination of interests of two people.
If you can win-win, then the marriage will maintain a stable posture.
If they become more and more depressed and unhappy in their feelings, they will decisively choose to end this unfortunate relationship.
You think that marriage is the beginning of a romance and happiness before the flower, the wind and the snow.
But in fact, two people who can't even learn to love themselves enter marriage, which is actually a disaster.
Marriage without a foundation of love is like walking on a tightrope, crumbling, and may fall at any time.
Feelings without an economic basis are putting themselves in an unsecured environment, and they may suffer from emotional reaction at any time.
Marriage requires feelings, and it is inseparable from a certain economic foundation.
And this is the true portrayal of the current marriage market.
Two people who love each other again, when it comes to talking about marriage, will also break up because of the bride price, the house, and the opinions of their parents.
Young people living a life of low desire is actually a silent confrontation with life.
Today's Topic:
Give you another chance, will you choose marriage?
(Article with picture source network)